DEAR HARRIETTE: My wife grew up attending summer camp every year with her siblings. It was one of those sleep-away camps up in Maine, where kids go for the entire summer. She explained that at first she didn't want to go because she didn’t want to be away from her parents for such a long time, but then she learned to love it. I, on the other hand, did not go to any form of camp, so the concept is foreign to me.

Last week we had a discussion about whether to send our kids to camp for two months in the summer. I am opposed to the idea, but my wife is sure that it will be amazing for our children. What should we do? -- Sleep-Away Camp, Philadelphia

DEAR SLEEP-AWAY CAMP: I am more like you than your wife. I went to sleep-away camp for a few days when I was a kid -- and I hated it. I even convinced my mother to let me come home early. But I know now that I simply had a bad experience.

Even though I hated camp, I allowed my daughter to go because she was adamant about it. She has been going to sleep-away camp in New Hampshire since she was 8 years old. She is 14 now, and she goes for a month. Many of her friends go for two months. I have to draw the line with that much time. Two months, for me and my family, is too long. It's not because we don’t value sleep-away camp, it is because we want to spend time with our daughter. In the summer, we think it is important to share quality time together.

Once the children go to college, if parents are doing the right thing, they become independent and are not in our presence as much. I want to enjoy as much time together as we can, while simultaneously granting appropriate amounts of freedom.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I dislike my younger sister’s boyfriend. He is a manipulative mooch. He uses his relationship with my sister to get things from my family. For example, he has basically moved into our house, eats all of our food and is constantly asking my parents for things. My parents are so obsessed with him that they got him a fancy laptop.

I feel like I am the only one who notices his behavior, and every time I try to bring it up, my sister and my parents ignore it. How do I get my family out from under this guy’s spell? -- Out of My House, Atlanta

DEAR OUT OF MY HOUSE: Keep pointing out obvious moments when he is taking advantage of the situation, but know that they may not wake up to his machinations until he has hurt them. Be ready to support your family when he makes his move. Meanwhile, point out that until he is an official family member, he should not have full privileges. That may help.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a party planner in Manhattan, New York, and I have just encountered one of my worst clients ever. This particular client came to my office to discuss her arrangements, but she got nasty with me and started an argument because she was upset that the red napkins she wanted are out of out of stock and won't be available in time for her event. I yelled back and kicked her out of the office -- respectfully. My assistant came up to me the other day to tell me that she doesn't like how I treated my client. I told her to mind her business and get back to work. I don't tolerate disrespect, and I don't want to make this situation any bigger than it already is. What should I do? -- Office out of Control, Manhattan, New York

DEAR OFFICE OUT OF CONTROL: Start with yourself. You work in a volatile industry where tempers often run high, yet as the party planner, you are required to keep a cool head. The notion of the customer always being right is alive and well. And you need to adhere to it. Rather than flying off the handle and yelling back at your customer, you should have gotten creative and figured out a viable solution that would please her. Yelling at her and later at your employee reflects poorly on you. Honestly, it also presents you as the one being disrespectful.

In the future, you need to stay calm and become a master problem solver. Your work requires you to handle endless challenges. In order to be successful, you must figure out how to stay positive throughout everything. Your job now is to repair the relationships at work and to build a positive reputation in the marketplace.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m a New Yorker who has been taking the train for my entire life. Day after day, I have dealt with delays and crowded trains. Enough is enough! I feel like I deserve some peace of mind, so I have decided that it is time for me to get a car. The problem is that I don’t have any money.

I’ve been trying to save up the money for a car, but it’s hard. I’m lacking motivation. I need help trying to pull though and save up for a car. Do you have tips for reaching my goal? -- Tired of the Subway, Queens, New York

DEAR TIRED OF THE SUBWAY: As a longtime New York City resident, I understand your frustration with the subway system; however, I will point out to you that it is the most efficient and affordable way to get around the city. Because I drive, I can tell you that if you intend to drive during the workday, you will essentially be trading crowds underground with crowds aboveground.

You may want to try using Zipcar for a while to see how well you like driving in the city. That’s an affordable way to figure out how dedicated you are to owning a car in the city.

In terms of saving for a car, commit to putting aside 10 percent of your income before you touch a dollar. If you do that, you will raise the money in no time. Just keep checking in with yourself to determine if buying a car is the best use of that money.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: When I was in primary school, I had a hard time getting along with other kids. My family was less fortunate, and people saw me as the poor girl and seemed to not want to play or even work on group projects with me. This brought me down several times, but it also encouraged me to continue working hard to become the successful woman I am today.

One of the kids who used to torment me constantly recently reached out to me to congratulate me on my company’s success. I simply replied “Thank you” and exited the conversation. He went on to tell me about his current situation and how he is in need of a couple of bucks. He hasn’t directly asked me for money, but I’m sure that it was implied. I know that I can provide him with some money, but I’m still hurt from his mean words in school. What should I do? -- Still Hurting, Baltimore

DEAR STILL HURTING: Congratulations on creating a successful life for yourself. The amazing reality for many people who were tormented as children is that they figure out how to rise above the fray and design dynamic lives for themselves. You do not have to bail out whoever asks you to just because you're doing well now. You can be generous with whomever you choose.

What you may want to do with this person is to take time to have a chat with him. Get together and listen to his story. If you can give him advice on how he can climb out of his hole, do so. Before you leave, tell him how hurtful his words and actions were when you were kids. Make sure he knows how isolating and humiliating it was for you when he and other kids judged you based on your lack of resources. Then wish him well. You have the capacity to forgive this man and hope for the best for him -- without giving him money.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m a high school student struggling with finding a balance between school, basketball practice and work. I take about three AP classes, and by the time I'm done with my activities, I tend to be too tired to complete my school assignments on time.

Every time I get the chance to take a break, I find myself going straight to sleep when I know that my sleeping hours should be used to complete work. Basketball is the only way that I know I can get into my dream school. Keeping my job is a must because I need the money to help support my mom and me at home. Do you have any tips on how I can balance roles of a student, athlete and employee at the same time? -- Unbalanced, Cleveland

DEAR UNBALANCED: Your goals are admirable, but you may be hurting yourself by taking on so much. If you are unable to keep up good grades because you are too tired to manage your life, that is a clear sign that something has to give. Speak to your guidance counselor and develop a strategy to get to college. You may want to take one fewer AP course so that you can have time to focus on the other two. You may need to cut your work hours a bit to add an hour or two back in for sleep and homework. Refine your schedule so that you can manage it.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)