DEAR HARRIETTE: I am one of six grandchildren on my mother's side. My grandmother likes to spend a lot of time with her grandchildren, so we see her a lot. Throughout my entire life, I have always been the least close with my grandma. She has clear favorites, and I seem to rank last on the list. It has gotten to the point where on my birthday I don't even receive a birthday card, whereas my siblings and cousins get endless gifts and cards. It hadn’t bothered me until now, and I want to speak to her about it. Do you think I should talk to my parents or go straight to my grandmother and tell her how I have been feeling? -- Left-Out Grandchild, Milwaukee

DEAR LEFT-OUT GRANDCHILD: If you feel strong enough emotionally to address this with your grandmother, go for it. Chances are, you will get the best answer if you ask yourself. Be mindful not to put her on the defensive, though, because she may retaliate rather than explain whatever is in her head. Approach her gingerly. Tell her you want to ask her a question. Ask her if you have done something to offend her, or if something happened that made her not care as much for you. If she rejects your feelings, tell her that you feel like she ignores you, while at the same time doting over her other grandchildren. Point out the most recent birthday snub as an example. In the end, tell her that you wish you had a closer relationship.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I have been trying to start a family for about a year. We have had some trouble conceiving, and I have suffered two miscarriages. My husband and I want a child, but maybe now is not the time for us. My husband insists that it is and wants to keep trying. How do I suggest to him that maybe we should take a break? I don’t want to come off as not wanting to start a family with him, but at the same time, I am emotionally and physically drained from all this baby stuff! -- Pause Starting a Family, Wilmington, Delaware

DEAR PAUSE STARTING A FAMILY: Now is a perfect time to bring your doctor into the picture. Schedule an appointment where you get a checkup on your health and guidance on when it is advised to start trying to conceive again. Tell your doctor about your trepidation, and ask for support. You may want to see a psychologist who can help you through the trauma of the two miscarriages.

I went through a miscarriage, and it was devastating for me. Even though it also upset my husband, honestly, there was something about the physical and emotional havoc that it wreaked on me that was unfathomable for him -- at least on some levels. It may take you longer to be ready to try again. Your husband may need a lot of support in understanding what you are going through. Therapy for both of you can be beneficial.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a high school athlete. I play soccer in the fall and lacrosse in the spring. At my high school, there are three separate sports seasons. Since I already play in two of those seasons, I am pretty busy.

The other day, my father told me I should take up another sport next winter to keep fit. As much as I love working out and playing for a team, I kind of like the idea of having an off-season. I would like that time just to hang out after school instead of going from practice to practice. What do you think would be best for me? Is there a way I can convince my dad to have the winter sports season off next year? -- Overworked Athlete, Salisbury, Maryland

DEAR OVERWORKED ATHLETE: Being involved in sports every season keeps you focused and occupied, which is probably on your father’s mind. Your argument that you just want to hang out after school will not likely come as a welcome option for him, as "hanging out" can sometimes lead to undesirable activities. That is not to say that you will find yourself in trouble, but having idle time is not ideal for everyone, especially students.

That said, I see the value in having some downtime. The argument you may want to present to your father is that you would like that one off-season to be able to have more time for homework and a little time to spend with your friends. In truth, you probably will be able to enjoy a bit more rest and devote more quality time to your schoolwork, which is always good.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am currently working in the United Kingdom. My younger sister attends a university in the United States, and her college graduation is coming up. I really want to be there and was planning on making my attendance a surprise.

As she tells me the scheduled plans for graduation weekend, I am starting to think it may be best if I tell her I am coming. As much as I would love to see her face when I show up at the ceremony, I fear that there is too much planning that goes into the weekend, and that my showing up may cause her more stress. What do you think would be the best solution to my dilemma? -- Graduation Surprise, London

DEAR GRADUATION SURPRISE: Your instincts are on point. The last thing you want to do is add stress to your sister’s graduation experience. Chances are, she will be thrilled to know that you are coming.

What you should do is contact her right away and inform her of your intention to be there to celebrate with her on this very special weekend. Ask her if she can secure a ticket to the graduation for you and if you can participate in the various activities planned for the weekend. This is key, because often tickets are limited, and restaurants require reservations during this busy time.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My girlfriend and I have been dating for a while now. Even though we have been together for years, I do not have a great relationship with her parents -- we don't have issues with one another, but we've never had a connection that flowed.

My girlfriend's college graduation is approaching, and I am nervous to attend due to the amount of time I would have to spend with her family. Do you have any advice on how I can survive the weekend with her not-so-welcoming parents? -- Surviving the Parents, New Haven, Connecticut

DEAR SURVIVING THE PARENTS: Keep your eyes on the prize: your girlfriend’s graduation. Remember that everyone is there to celebrate her. Get her parents talking when you are around them by asking them questions about what your girlfriend was like growing up or what they remember about her as a student and as a child. Whenever you are together, ask them to travel down memory lane. This will keep them in a positive state of mind and may distract them from whatever negative feelings they have about you. Stay positive, and remember that they are responsible for your girlfriend’s life. Be grateful for that, even if they are difficult.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a junior in high school. My of my peers have started studying and taking the SAT and ACT exams. Most of my friends have already had numerous tutoring sessions, taken practice exams and attended prep classes. My parents did not attend college in the United States, so they are unaware of these standardized exams. I have been trying to explain to them that SAT and ACT preparation is not something we learn in school; therefore, I cannot seek help from teachers.

I want to join my friends in an SAT prep class, but my parents are hesitant to pay for it. How do I get my point across to them that I need some extra help when studying for these exams? -- Parents Hesitant to Help with SATs, Portland, Oregon

DEAR PARENTS HESITANT TO HELP WITH SATS: Your job is to educate your parents, just as you are being educated. Do some research on the positive effects of being tutored specifically for these standardized tests. By showing your parents the value of this coaching, you create space for them to support you.

Your parents came as far as bringing you to the U.S. for your higher education. You have to carry the baton the rest of the way. Your argument cannot be that all your friends are doing it. Instead, you can share facts you've researched about what scores are required for the colleges of your choice, what type of tester you tend to be, and the advantage that you believe taking such a course will give you.

Also, look into the cost of these test-prep courses. You can ask your teachers for guidance. Not all of the packages have the same price. Finally, if your parents do not agree to pay for the test, ask them to buy you a test-prep book, and you can study independently.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)