DEAR HARRIETTE: My teenage daughters are obsessed with taking photos of themselves. Just last week, I walked into my backyard to see a bikini photoshoot they were having with each other. They explained that this is all for social media and for likes. I am not comfortable with the amount of time they spend creating an image that isn’t real. Another time, they spent hours doing their makeup on a Sunday, posed against a white wall and edited these photos on their laptops.

Is there any way I can control this situation? I want them to be spending their time learning or adventuring, not staring at screens unnecessarily. -- Stunned on the Sidelines, Raleigh, North Carolina

DEAR STUNNED ON THE SIDELINES: You are not likely to win the battle of getting your daughters off social media. Their behavior is similar to thousands of other teens across the country. You should take a look at some of the social media sites that they like. You will see photo shoots just like what they are doing. This may help to build their confidence. Be sure to monitor what they are posting and where. Talk to your girls about the types of images they are choosing to post. It is important for them to understand that all kinds of people can view social media. Your daughters should think about who they may be attracting. It is your job to make that clear to them. That means scaring them a bit.

In this day and age, sexual predators are a real threat to young women, as is human trafficking. I hate to be so severe, but our world has some negative forces in it, and your daughters must be mindful of being too provocative in their postings. They should never post their address, telephone number or location.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I turned 60 last week. I had a great day and spent it doing what I love, but one thing bothered me -- my own daughter forgot my birthday, while my stepdaughter remembered. She hasn’t been my stepdaughter for a long time (one year), but she managed to get me a present and a card. My own daughter called me yesterday saying that her brother just reminded her she missed my birthday. I know this is simply a single day in a year, but it hurts to know that someone I raised didn’t think to call me to wish me a happy birthday. Should I let this go? I am unsure how to reconcile my feelings. -- Forgotten Father, Las Vegas

DEAR FORGOTTEN FATHER: I understand your hurt feelings, and I’m sorry your daughter did not remember you on your special day. I must ask you, though, how often do you communicate with her? Your stepdaughter is new in your life in that role, so your being “Dad” to her is top of mind. How engaged you are in your relationship with your biological daughter may influence her remembering to contact you on your big day. I’m not making an excuse for her, by the way. I’m just pointing out that family dynamics can be complicated.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: Before the actual prom, there is a “pre-prom.” This is where we take pictures all together and then we head over to prom. Typically, the girls plan pre-prom, and the guys do after-prom. This year, it is a little different because the guys are planning pre-prom.

Most of my friends are going to prom together, but my date is in a different friend group. This means that I will be at a different house for pre-prom. All my friends are saying that I should tell my date that I want to be with my friends so I can be in the pictures, but I feel bad. I was thinking I would split the time, but I don’t know if that is a good idea. What should I do? -- Splits, Buffalo, New York

DEAR SPLITS: It looks like your friend intersections aren’t working very well. Ideally, your plan could work if you coordinate with everyone. If the houses are not too far away from each other, plan to split your time between the houses so that you and your date get to be in each other’s company for the pre-prom photos. This may require asking for the festivities to begin earlier than normal to accommodate travel time. If you discover that you are too far away for this to be practical, plan to meet up before prom and take photos together outside before you go into the event.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a somewhat shy 20-year-old woman. I was invited to a party for a friend who I am not close with. By all accounts, this party sounds like it’s going to be big and fancy. My friend knows a lot of people, and her family has a big, fabulous house near the beach. It sounds like a big deal. My family says the right thing to do is to go. I do not feel comfortable going alone because I don’t know anyone. Would it be rude if I asked this person if I could bring a friend with me? Is that impolite? -- Party 567, Miami

DEAR PARTY 567: I like that your family is encouraging you to break out of your shell and go to the party. It can feel daunting to go for it, but it is important for you to push past your shyness and get out there. It is also smart to ask if you can bring a friend. By all means, call the host and simply ask. If this is a big party and not a sit-down dinner, chances are your friend will be happy to welcome your guest.

If you feel you need to explain why you want to bring along a guest, you can tell the truth and say you’re a bit shy and generally don’t go to parties alone. No need to offer up that information unless you get asked, though.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am currently focused on building my savings account and becoming financially secure. I work a 9-to-5 job, and I bartend on the weekends, so this doesn’t leave much time for myself. Recently, my friend "Alec" told me that he sees me as something more than a friend. I could see us in a relationship, but I am honestly too focused on creating stability right now. Do I let this opportunity pass me by? I barely have time for myself, let alone a relationship. -- Riding Solo, Dallas

DEAR RIDING SOLO: I believe in creating a well-balanced life. From my perspective, that includes a partner with whom you can share your victories and challenges. Sure, it’s important to become financially secure. This should be a goal for every person. But to what end? I don’t think you need to consider financial independence as mutually exclusive of having a loving relationship.

Instead of shooing Alec away, talk to him about your goals and dreams. Ask him to share his as well. Express your focus on building financial security. Find out his perspective on finances and the future. As you talk to him about the things that are important to you, you will discover whether you two have compatible interests and goals. If you do, consider sharing some of your time with Alec as you continue with your life’s plan.

I met a couple recently who met when they were young and each dreaming about designing a better life for themselves. They started out as friends, and ended up getting married and being business partners. From nothing more than talking about the future, they built a life for themselves and a business that was worth millions.

DEAR HARRIETTE: "Sean" and I have been friends for a few years. For most of the time we’ve known each other, he’s been in a serious relationship. That recently ended with his now-ex breaking his heart. At first, I became his confidant because I wanted to help him get through this tough time, but now I am hearing that he is staying close to me to try to use me as a rebound.

I am very put off by Sean right now, and I want to know if he ever saw me as a friend. Should I confront Sean about what I’ve been hearing or just let his messages go unanswered? -- Friends?, Boston

DEAR FRIENDS?: Talk to Sean directly. Tell him what you have heard about his intentions and how upsetting these rumors are. Speak about your feelings. If you like him as more than a friend, tell him. But know that people typically need time to heal right after breakups. Often, the person who is there immediately after does become the rebound person, even if it isn’t intentional.

If you want a real chance with Sean, you may need to step back or at least draw the line as to what boundaries you are willing to cross with him until he is on solid ground. By all means, be honest with him about where you stand and what you want from your friendship.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)