DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been a part of a chat group for a year or so. We originally bonded from our love of playing video games, but we have now turned into a global support system for each other. We have spoken through video chats, and I have found all of these people on social media, so I know I am not being "catfished." I want to organize our first meetup in person. Would it be crazy to invite them to stay at my place? I don't have the funds for an international flight, so I figured I'd be doing my part by allowing them to stay in my house. -- Online Family, West Palm Beach, Florida

DEAR ONLINE FAMILY: Given that this is a group of people -- and not just one -- chances are that you will be safe if they all descend upon your home. What could easily be awkward, though, is managing expectations and expenses. Should you decide to suggest this idea, why not float it first to see who is interested?

If there is substantial interest, lay the ground rules in writing to the group. Without changing the energy of your communications, let them know that you are happy to have everybody stay at your house if everyone agrees to pitch in with particular responsibilities, including chipping in for food (and cooking) and keeping things tidy. Make your list as thorough as you deem important, and only move forward if several people agree to come. A one-on-one meetup could be awkward and unsafe.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My wife has gone completely bananas baby-proofing our home. She is 8 months pregnant and snaps at me if I don't replace the plastic outlet cover the second I am done using power. Also, I don't always close the gate on the stairs since we do not yet have a child. She thinks these habits of mine will carry over when we have a child, but I think she is overreacting. How can I get her to realize we have months before we seriously have to worry about a mobile baby? There's Time, Pittsburgh

DEAR THERE'S TIME: Beware the intensity of a pregnant woman's demands. I say that having been pregnant myself. The mothering instinct kicks in, and for some women it becomes all about safety. And dare I say, for some of us, a certain skepticism arises as to whether anyone, including Daddy, can possibly keep the child safe enough.

You are dealing with a woman who sounds like she is living somewhere in that state of mind, so tread lightly. Do your best to try to remember to close the gate and cover the outlet. These are simple yet important requests. When, in your estimation, your wife goes too far, ask her to reel it in a bit. Point out that the baby will not crawl, or even sit up for that matter, for a long while after it is born.

Promise to work together with your wife to protect your child. And then, remember to do it. Don't slack. Do pay attention -- all the time. It is actually extremely hard to do, by the way, which is why your wife wants you to practice now.

(Harriette Cole is a life stylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I pay the phone bills of my adult children. They range in age from 18 to 29. I don't mind paying these bills, but my wife recently questioned why I'm doing so if they never answer my calls or text messages. I typically get ignored for a few days. For my youngest, I've tracked down his friend's phone numbers so I can contact him through them when he isn't responsive to me. Should I take my wife's advice and stop paying their phone bills since they don't use these phones to communicate with me? -- Ring Ring, Norman, Oklahoma

DEAR RING RING: As children grow up, it is natural for them to become more independent. This often means that they communicate less with their parents. That said, if you are footing the bill for their independence, you might have a bit of leverage here. Let me ask how often you call them. If you expect to speak to them every day, that may be unrealistic for certain children.

What you need to do is establish a rhythm with them that you both agree to honor. Ask each of them for a once-a-week call on a particular day, preferably within a window of time. Try that to see if it can become routine for you. If they continue to ignore your calls and you believe that you aren't being unreasonable with the frequency of your calls, put your foot down. Tell them that you are unwilling to continue to pay for their phones if they refuse to communicate with you on an agreed-upon regular basis.

Ultimately you may not be able to find an established time with each of your children, but chances are high that they will make the effort to be in touch more if they value your footing that bill. What you want to be mindful of is not lording the money over them. They are likely able to pay their own phone bills. What you really want is to be in touch.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have begun the process of downsizing to move into a small apartment. Originally, I thought I could have a minimalist lifestyle, but I've realized I am too attached to my clothing. How can I possibly let go of my prom dress, my first pair of high heels or my old college sorority shirts? Is downsizing not a possibility for me? -- Memories, Chicago

DEAR MEMORIES: Go through your belongings carefully and put them into piles. Which items do you need for your life -- for all four seasons? Which items fit into the memorabilia category? And which are simply extra? Maybe they don't fit, are out of style, whatever.

Allow yourself the opportunity to let go of things that are holding you back from your move. Solicit help. You may want to start by reading "The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up" by Marie Kondo. This is a precious book that will help you learn how to let go of things that are cluttering your life.

(Harriette Cole is a life stylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My teenage daughter confessed to me that she called the police to shut down a party in our town. She knew other kids in her grade were invited to this shindig and she wasn't, so she called the police to make sure nobody had fun on a Saturday night.

Honestly, I am disappointed in her. I know being excluded hurts, but I never thought my own daughter would turn into the town rat. What can I say to her so she understands I feel bad for her but don't think this is the way to make friends? -- Don't Squeal, Bronxville, New York

DEAR DON'T SQUEAL: Your daughter knows that her call to the police will not make friends. She is way past that point right now. She feels hurt and angry, and she came up with an effective way of retaliating against the other teens. This certainly is not a wise action. It is completely selfish and mean-spirited.

To get her to see that doing such a thing will only make life worse for her, you must appeal to her interests. What does she like to do? Who would she like to hang out with? What stands in her way?

Sometimes the reason that teens reject one of their classmates has to do with the behavior of that person. If there is something your daughter should do to temper her interactions with these desired friends, you can talk to her about that. What you don't want to do is encourage her to be anything but herself. This may mean that she needs to cultivate a new friend group. You can help her with that by enrolling her in extracurricular activities that require her to meet new people.

As far as addressing the call to the police, ask her to imagine how she would feel if someone did that to her.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friends constantly lament about how their beach bodies are not ready and they don't know why. They are heavy drinkers, and with heavy drinking comes heavy eating. I try to limit my alcohol consumption so I don't end up hung over and to avoid the calories, but these lessons seem lost on my friends.

Is it my responsibility to try to steer them away from food when they are drunk? They constantly tell me not to "let them" eat while drunk, but I feel as though it is inevitable. -- Booze and Bikinis, Morristown, New Jersey

DEAR BOOZE AND BIKINIS: You are not responsible for your friends' alcohol consumption or for their calorie intake. Because you obviously care about them, you may want to tell them, at a time when they are sober, that they are killing their chances to meet their beach-body goal.

When they ask why, remind them that alcohol is highly caloric and so is binge eating, and they are doing both on a regular basis. Point out that it is their choice what kind of bodies they will have in a few weeks.

(Harriette Cole is a life stylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)