DEAR HARRIETTE: My wife is pregnant with our first child, and she is truly reveling in being pregnant. She loves the changes her body is going through, and now that she's toward the end of her pregnancy, she wants a nude maternity shoot. This makes me uncomfortable because I wouldn't have someone else see my naked body, and I don't want some random photographer looking at hers. She says this is just about documenting pregnancy and the life she is creating, but I'm still unnerved. Could I take these photos for her as a compromise? She wants a professional photographer. -- Photo Shoots, Madison, Wisconsin

DEAR PHOTO SHOOTS: I want to share with you that some women feel beautiful during pregnancy and want to capture the image of that beauty as it may be a unique experience for them. In fact, it can be the only time that some women feel to the very core of their being that they are beautiful -- it is attached to a hormonal reality, that a child is growing within them. You have no need to feel jealous.

As one who has worked in the world of image for a long time, I recommend that you agree to having a professional photographer take her picture so that it will actually be a great photo. You can be there, if you are both comfortable with that. I promise you that this is not about her wanting to have someone else see her nude. It is about her celebrating the miracle of bringing a child into the world. Help her to celebrate.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I know many high-profile investors. My brother-in-law "Dave" wanted to have a meeting with two investors I know to pitch them a restaurant idea. Dave bailed on me a few days before the meeting. I was embarrassed that my name was attached to someone so unprofessional. This meeting wasn't something easy to schedule, and I didn't want to waste the investors' time. My sister doesn't like family working together, yet her husband thinks it's all right to try to reschedule the investor meeting he bailed on. Do I give Dave another chance? -- Dud Dave, New Orleans

DEAR DUD DAVE: Your wake-up call equals listening to your sister about her own husband. She told you not to work with him, in one way or another. You ignored her. And your decision backfired in your face. Why do you need more in order to stand down?

Your brother-in-law blew his chance to meet your investors. If he is now ready to make a presentation to investors, let him find them. You can tell him that you gave him a chance, which you did, and he walked away. The truth is that anyone who is trying to access funding for a project has to be willing to work hard and always be ready to present if money could be on the table. He was not ready. He is no longer your responsibility, and you have absolutely no reason to feel bad about that. Simply say no. You never know when you will need to reach out to them again. If you damage your reputation twice, they will say no the next time.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was a baker for a number of years. I now work in construction, but I still have my skills. My friends love to ask me to bake them cakes for birthdays when they didn't think to order a cake (or want a freebie). This bothers me because although I like to bake for others, this is just exploiting my abilities. I've tried saying no to the requests, but I get guilted into it or iced out. How do I stop being the bakery for my friends? -- Betty Crocker, Los Angeles

DEAR BETTY CROCKER: Over the years, I have learned an important lesson: It is essential for people to stand in their own power in order to have ease in their life. This means having the courage and presence of mind to understand what your responsibilities are and what your value is, and that it is imperative for you to let others know that. This includes your friends. It is time for you to stop feeling guilty for having talent. It is up to you to stop them from taking you for granted.

To do so, you should make a menu of bakery options that you are willing and happy to make. Figure out how much each item should cost -- including raw materials, time and creativity. List the prices next to the item, and then distribute the list to your family and friends. Let them know that while your primary job is in construction, you have decided to continue to freelance as a baker since so many people are interested. If you receive a request, verify that the person is willing to pay the price. Have a formal order placed and paid for before you start mixing. If they balk, invite them to go to the local bakery. The end.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I feel super insecure about my yellow teeth. Everyone else walks around with straight white teeth. Well, I never had braces and can't spend hundreds of dollars at the dentist whitening my teeth. I've tried the at-home fixes (banana peels, strawberries, coconut oil, etc.), but still find myself trying not to smile so I don't showcase my crooked yellow teeth. How else can I get dazzling teeth? -- Yellow Chompers, Washington, D.C.

DEAR YELLOW CHOMPERS: Look around. Most people with their natural teeth have some version of yellow teeth. Why? Teeth yellow with age. That said, you can avoid certain foods that accelerate discoloration. This includes coffee, red wine, beets and other deeply staining foods. Smoking is a disaster for teeth and overall health.

Beyond altering your diet, you can try a tooth whitener again. Guess what? Baking soda is a natural tooth whitener. Also, some of the over-the-counter dental whiteners can work quickly. But I want to say to you that we all have challenges with personal self-confidence. If you are able to see past your teeth, you will create the opportunity to cherish each moment of your life. Trust me, there are people with no teeth who find a way to savor what's before them. You can, too!

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: While doing a quick self-exam, I found a lump in my left breast. I froze and immediately scheduled an appointment with my doctor. I am almost 60 years old, and I haven't told any of my children about my hospital visits. The lump turned out to just be an infection, but I had cancerous cells removed more than a decade ago. Should I tell my children about my health scare? I don't want them to take my time left for granted, but I also don't want them worrying about me. -- Big Scare, Pikesville, Maryland

DEAR BIG SCARE: Now is not the time to frighten your children for no reason. Instead, make sure that you have a complete physical. Ask every question you can think of, and share every detail of your health history. Do your own due diligence so that you are clear about your health status. Given that your health scare was resolved, count yourself smart and still independent.

Thinking about the future, you should decide which of your children will be your main health advocate. Ask that child to agree to be that support to you. It's best if he or she lives near you so that if and when you have health concerns, it will be manageable for him or her to attend doctor's visits with you and follow up as needed. When you introduce the idea, be sure to say the truth, that nothing is wrong now, but you are thinking ahead and want to have your plans in order.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am beginning a journey of being sober. I realize at this point in my life, binge drinking alcohol is doing nothing but harm for me. However, my friends drink a lot. This makes me think about the saying "Tell me who your friends are, and I'll tell you who you are." I clearly can't make a whole new group of friends, nor do I want to.

How can I be the only sober person without drawing attention to myself? I am becoming sober because I want to focus on my weight loss and mental well-being. -- Friends Love Alcohol, Boston

DEAR FRIENDS LOVE ALCOHOL: Getting sober and being around drinkers does not work. For a short time at least, you will need to separate from your friends. This doesn't mean that you have to part from them forever. It does mean that in order for you to turn a corner and create a new pattern in your life, you have to go it alone for a bit. It doesn't work to try to disguise your non-drinking. Your friends will notice, and unless you are prepared to tell them about your choice and ask them to support you, you have to step aside.

You may be pleasantly surprised to learn that some of your friends may want to join you on this path if you tell them. Your happy medium may be announcing your plans to your friends and asking if anyone wants to make that choice with you. You will quickly learn if you have to go it alone, or if any of them chooses to join you.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)