DEAR HARRIETTE: After upping my fiber intake following a trip to my doctor, I have been having a very rumbly stomach. I need to pass gas much more frequently than in the past. I've been eating a ton of beans and broccoli, so my weight is going down, but my embarrassment has been going up. Sometimes I cannot even excuse myself. What can I do about this completely mortifying problem? My doctor did not tell me to expect this. -- Toot Trouble, Brooklyn, New York

DEAR TOOT TROUBLE: The first thing you should do is call your doctor. Check in with him and describe exactly what your diet has been, including what the increase in fiber has been. Your doctor may choose to have you modify the quantity of fiber that you are consuming.

You should also drink a lot of water. In order for the fiber and nutrients to move through your body easefully, you need to be properly hydrated. Adding fiber without balancing that addition with at least an equal amount of water could be clogging your system rather than helping it to cleanse.

Finally, do some research on fiber sources. Beans are known to produce gas for many people. Look for foods that are gentler on your system that will lead to the same goal.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been working at my current company for a few months now. Recently, my boss CC'd me on an email describing a work trip to China. I am ecstatic about this opportunity; however, I've never taken a professional trip. How can I make sure I don't make any rookie mistakes when traveling overseas? The trip is for a week and would include three employees plus my boss. -- International Success, Chicago

DEAR INTERNATIONAL SUCCESS: What an exciting time this is for you! To prepare for your trip, start with your boss. Ask to have a brief meeting to talk about the trip. Come with a list of questions about how the meetings will be run, what the expectations will be of you, and whether there are any social customs that your boss feels are important for you to know and follow.

From there, do your own research. Read about cultural mores in China, particularly in the town that you will be visiting. Learn about food delicacies, greetings, dining etiquette, business etiquette and professional attire. Check in with your HR department to learn if there are any guidelines in place that your company typically follows. The more questions you ask, the more you will learn.

When you are on your trip, take your cues from your boss. Be observant. Notice how your colleagues interact with your local hosts and business colleagues. Be bright and friendly. If you do make mistakes, which is quite common, stay pleasant and willing to learn the appropriate way to handle a situation. It's not as important for you to make no mistakes. It is important for you to recover from them with grace and dignity.

(Harriette Cole is a life stylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My fiancee and I are finally moving in together. This is my first time in a while living with someone other than my children, and the same goes for her. I have a very minimalistic approach to how a house should be decorated, while she loves to make a house into a home. I've been struggling with how to incorporate both of our decorating styles into a shared living space. She loves earthy tones, while I love modern, sleek furniture. Is there any way each of us can win without clashing? -- Mix & Match, Indianapolis

DEAR MIX & MATCH: Here's where creativity needs to step in, along with a healthy dose of patience. What many couples do -- if they have the space -- is to let each partner have a room that they can decorate any way they want. This gives you complete freedom of expression in at least one area. The rest is a negotiation.

The idea of making the house a home is a great one, which you should acknowledge. Move from there to discussing how to incorporate dashes of color into her earthy palette. Get some interiors magazines to give you ideas. Look at some of the decorating shows on HGTV. Watch together and talk through design ideas and solutions. If you get into the project together, you will have a better chance of developing a shared visual identity that will make you both comfortable. Just remember that compromise is the key to happiness!

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a newfound love for entering contests. I love the possibility of winning something for free. Although I've entered over two dozen contests (for a free bike, free vacation, free fitness classes, etc.), I've never won. I am disappointed, but I keep going because I know my day will come. My friends say this is the beginning of an addiction, but it's all free! No harm if I'm not spending money, right? -- Love Freebies, Minneapolis

DEAR LOVE FREEBIES: I hate to break it to you, but the saying is largely true: Nothing in life is actually free. What do I mean? Even if or when you do receive a gift from one of these offers, what have you given in exchange? Usually, you have given up lots of personal information that marketers use to bombard you with promotions, hoping to lure you into buying something from them.

The amount of time that you invest in trying to get something for free could be better focused on getting yourself closer to a big goal that you have. Rethink how you spend your time and what you really want. And think through the free offers. For example, if you win a free vacation, how will you get there? Do you have the disposable income to enjoy yourself once you go? The swirl of energy that makes these offers so enticing usually fizzles out fast when you face reality. I vote for keeping your eyes on your own dreams rather than a random freebie that just keeps you hyped up.

(Harriette Cole is a life stylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am getting more and more nervous about the upcoming election. I am a very liberal democrat, but I rarely speak about my political views. Debates with others just exhaust me, so I make my voice heard at the polls.

I thought my friends shared views similar to mine until someone parked a tractor decorated with a candidate's slogan in the middle of town. I shuddered when I saw it, but I only heard praise for it when out to coffee with my friends. I now wonder if my silence there suggests that I was in agreement with the tractor. Is it time to speak out about my views, or should I just wait until all of the political talk dies down? -- Take It to the Polls, Meredith, New Hampshire

DEAR TAKE IT TO THE POLLS: Silence can mean many things. It could have suggested to your friends that you agreed with their stand. If you feel adamantly about this political race, even though debating may exhaust you, you should speak up and state why you are making the choice you are making. One thing you can do is organize a debate-watching party, where you let attendees know in advance that you are welcoming people who may support different candidates. Plan to have a discussion after the debate where everyone shares their views. Get others interested in what can prove to be a lively discussion. In this way, you don't have to bite your tongue, and you may just influence a vote or two! At the very least, if you are able to inspire people to go to the polls to express their individual choice by voting, you will have done a great thing.

DEAR HARRIETTE: For the past few months, I have realized that my food money runs very low at the end of the month. Whenever I go to the store, I come in with a mental list of what I need and the meals I want to make. From there, I make impulse purchases in the store, like cookies or vegetables that end up wilting or rotting in my fridge. How can I help my food budget at the end of the month? -- Impulse Chocolate, Syracuse, New York

DEAR IMPULSE CHOCOLATE: It sounds like you are shopping while hungry, which is one of the most dangerous ways to spend your money. Make sure that you go to the grocery store on a full stomach. Also, make a written list of what you need to purchase. As you travel through the store, check off each item from your list. Resist the temptation to purchase anything that was not already written down.

To ensure that you do not feel completely deprived, add one affordable indulgence. A small container of chocolates or a small box of cookies -- something that doesn't spoil -- could be added. As far as vegetables go, select enough for one or two servings to reduce the potential for waste.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)