DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a situation. I have a volunteer at my church, and he can go to sleep at any minute of the day. Last week, there was an early morning meeting, and I found him asleep during an important presentation. There have been separate instances where he went to sleep right in front of an individual in mid-conversation. Good people are hard to find these days, and I do not want to lose him because of his erratic sleeping habits. How can I bring this issue up without embarrassing him? -- Wake Him Up, Queens, New York

DEAR WAKE HIM UP: Your church volunteer may have a serious medical problem, so it is in his best interest that you speak to him about it right away. He may not know that he falls asleep in this way, or he may think it is no big deal. There are a number of health conditions, such as sleep apnea, that could cause one to fall asleep suddenly.

Tell this man that you are concerned about him. Describe to him what you have witnessed with your own eyes. The more specific you can be, the easier it will be for him to receive this feedback. Explain that his sudden falling asleep is affecting his ability to do his work at the church. But more, point out that it could affect his overall well-being. Suggest that he make a doctor's appointment immediately to get a complete physical. Ask him if it would be OK for you to check back in with him about this in the coming days and weeks. He may need your urging to get him to take action.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a teenage mother, and I currently live with my mother. For the past eight months, our relationship has grown distant, ever since my child arrived. I think my mother is angry with me because I became a teenage mom and I became sexually active at a very early age. Is there a way I can create positive dialogue with my mom? -- Momma's Baby, Memphis

DEAR MOMMA'S BABY: As you are experiencing, it is a huge job to take care of an infant. Add to that taking care of yourself, and your life can be stressful. For your mother, these past few months may have felt as overwhelming for her as they probably have been for you. She may feel guilty for not being able to steer you in a safer direction where you would choose not to have sex at all or to have protected sex. She is likely worried about your future, the possibilities for your continued education, the health of your child and how to pay for everything. The list of her concerns is probably long.

What you should do is some deep thinking of your own. What can you do to be more responsible for yourself and your child? How can you contribute more fully to your household? How can you engage your mother so that she knows you love and appreciate her for all that she does? Start talking to her honestly. Ask her for guidance and listen when she speaks. Thank her for all that she is doing for you and pledge to be the best contributor that you can be to your household.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a crush on my best friend. I am unsure if he has gotten the hint, but he has started to act weird around me. We have been friends for four years, and I could not imagine not having him in my life. It scares me when I think about not being friends with him anymore. I tell him everything. My friends think that I should tell him how I feel. I am nervous; I think that if I do tell him, he will stop talking to me because he won't know what to say or how to act around me. I really like him, and even if we just stay friends, I would be OK with that. How should I approach this situation? -- Nervous, Boston

DEAR NERVOUS: Take a deep breath and collect yourself. I believe your friends have a point. Since your best friend has changed his behavior around you recently, there must be a reason for that. Rather than trying to second-guess what that is, you can be forthright with him.

Tell him that you want to talk about something sensitive. With his blessing, go on and explain that you have developed feelings for him and are unsure how to proceed. Tell him how much you value your friendship and that you do not want to jeopardize that for anything. At the same time, reveal that if he shares your interest, you would like to see what happens if you start dating. Make it clear that if he just wants to be friends, you are good with that, too.

Being honest about your feelings should help to ease the tension, regardless of the outcome.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am in high school, and I get pushed into drama all the time. Now I have my own drama. There is this guy I like who goes to my school, but I also like another one who I used to like in middle school. I have different reasons for liking each one, but I don't know what to do. Please help. -- Helplessly in Love, Pace, Florida

DEAR HELPLESSLY IN LOVE: Slow down. You are in high school, and it's perfectly normal that you haven't made a decision yet as to who will be your beau for life. If one of these boys expresses interest in you, pay attention to him first. Get to know him better to see if you share interests. Agree to spend time together.

If the other boy also invites you to do things with him, you are free to do that as well. Take your time to get to know him, too. Do not tell either boy that you are exclusive. And do not cross any intimate boundaries as you are getting to know them. When it is clear to you that you prefer one over the other, you may want to choose to focus your attention on him. If and when that happens, gracefully tell the other boy that you do not want to date him anymore. Being kind when transitioning out of a relationship is critical to maintaining respectful bonds.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My wife of 30 years cut me off from all loving five years ago for no reason. I am 70 years old, and I still have 100 percent of my sexual ability. Do you think my wife has a boyfriend or someone else? I've read that a woman who has cheated can no longer have sex and enjoy it like she did previously. The Bible says if a person causes another person to sin, she is guilty for it. What can I do? -- Need Some Lovin', Taylorville, Illinois

DEAR NEED SOME LOVIN': I think you should invite your wife out for a romantic dinner. Suggest that she order her favorite foods. Listen to her conversation. Be fully present with her. Tell her that you love her and appreciate her and look forward to spending the next 30 years of your lives together. Ask her what you can do that would make her feel great. Use this romantic moment to be a great listener.

If she is open to conversation, ask her what you can do to get her interested in intimacy again. Tell her that you miss that part of your relationship and want to figure out how to rekindle the romantic spirit.

While it is possible that your wife has someone else, it is equally if not more likely that her libido has slowed down. You can ask her why she chooses not to be intimate with you anymore. Be prepared to listen to her answer. As you encourage her to change her mind, do not behave forcefully. That will not win her back.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am 28 years old and have already been married and divorced. My divorce was just finalized, but we have been separated for more than 1 1/2 years. I think I'm ready to date again, but I'm also extremely apprehensive. I'm so used to being in a serious, committed relationship that I'm not sure how to just date around anymore. Also, my divorce was a big part of my life, but I know I shouldn't talk about it with potential dates. How can I be honest about my past without drawing attention to it? -- Single and Ready to Mingle, New York City

DEAR SINGLE AND READY TO MINGLE: Save the discussion about your marriage and divorce for your therapist and good friends. Get yourself out there and do the things you love that involve socializing with others. When you meet someone interesting and eventually go on a date, keep it light. Learn about him by asking questions and listening carefully. When it's your turn, be honest, but do not dump your whole marriage story on anyone in the first meeting. You are single. You can call yourself that. If you end up liking someone, you can share more details about your past.

For now, focus on what qualities you admire in a partner and speak about them. Ask your suitor what he admires in a potential partner. By speaking honestly about your desires, you can learn whether someone is deserving of learning more about you as you discover more about him.