DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been so sad lately, and I can't seem to snap out of it. Everything seems to be falling apart. My bills are way behind. I'm afraid to answer the phone for fear of another creditor threatening me. My husband just left me. I lost my job six months ago. I'm not kidding. All these things have happened. On the positive side, some friends have helped me out. I stayed on one friend's sofa for a month, since my husband put me out when he broke up with me. I've been in a shelter for a few weeks, but it's horrible. I don't feel like my life is worth much anymore. I don't see how it could possibly get better, and I have nowhere to turn. I feel like giving up for real. Can you help me? -- Lost, Chicago

DEAR LOST: Thank you so much for writing to me. It shows that you haven't totally given up yet. With the list of bad things that have happened to you, it's understandable that you would feel depressed. It is normal to sink into melancholy when so many negative things encroach upon your life.

That said, you do not have to give up. You do not need to be alone. In fact, I recommend that you not be alone right now. You can call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK. You can also touch base with any friends you have who are available to lend an ear, a sofa or some love. Your life can get better. Get help now. Your life is worth it!

DEAR HARRIETTE: I met this man last week in the neighborhood pharmacy. We spoke to each other for a few minutes, and in the middle of our conversation, I discovered that he owns his own business, just like me. I am excited because we have the same aspirations of working for ourselves, and, more important, I did not use a social media website to meet him. The potential for a relationship sounds promising, but I have some concerns. For example, when would we find the time to date each other? Do you think it is a good idea to work together on a few projects? I am thinking we can make money together and see each other at the same time. -- What a Girl Wants, Brooklyn, N.Y.

DEAR WHAT A GIRL WANTS: It's a little soon to know if this meeting could become a relationship yet. It is great that you met someone who shares some common interests with you. Though you are both busy, it is possible to carve out time to go out, to talk on the phone, etc. If you cannot find any time, that does not bode well for a relationship in general.

If it feels natural to work on a project together, that could be an option. But I caution you to get to know each other first to see if you are compatible as friends and to discover if you share business values.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was doing the laundry the other day and found a business card with a woman's personal cellphone number in my husband's pants pocket. I know that it could be completely innocent, but he wore those pants on a night when he stayed out exceptionally late. When I asked him where he had been, he sort of brushed me off. He smelled like he had been drinking, which is not the norm for him. I don't want it to be true that he is having an affair or even thinking about it, but it really troubled me. I know I could be overthinking this. What should I say to find out the truth? -- Possibly Betrayed, Detroit

DEAR POSSIBLY BETRAYED: Rather than letting your mind get the best of you, talk to your husband. Pick a time when he is fully awake, sober and free of distractions. Express your concern about his behavior on that ill-fated day when he came home intoxicated. Tell him you found the business card in his pocket and it sounded an internal alarm for you. Ask him what is going on. Be direct. Ask him who the woman is on the card. If you actually do suspect that he had an affair or is considering it, tell him of your suspicions and ask him to think about your marriage before crossing that line.

Will he answer you honestly? That is hard to say. Watch his body language to see what his being is telling you. Ask him if he is committed to your marriage. If so, choose to figure out things you can do together that can strengthen your bond.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I are separating after 14 years of marriage. We have two sons, and they are having a terrible time dealing with it. My husband has said some horrible things about me to them, and I fear that he is teaching them bad ways to treat woman. I know I don't have any control over what he says or does, but I am distraught by it all. It's bad enough that he is dumping me for another woman. Why does he have to bad-mouth me, too? What can I do to help my boys learn how to be good men? -- Ferocious Mom, Westchester, N.Y.

DEAR FEROCIOUS MOM: Somehow, you need to get to your husband and remind him that the two of you will always be parents to your children. Ask him to try to remember this as you go through your divorce. Appeal to his love for the children as a reason that he should resist speaking negatively about you or your marriage. Suggest that it is possible to break up without being disrespectful and that this is important for your sons' health and well-being.

If necessary, get your attorney involved. If you believe that he will continue to defile your name, ask your attorney to go to court to request a hearing to discuss custody of the children.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a college senior, and I am concerned about my upcoming journey into the real world. I am preparing myself to apply for jobs, but I am very shy. I have tried to be assertive and I have attended job fairs on campus, but when I go, I just briefly greet the recruiter, put my resume on the table and run away. What are some networking tips shy people should keep in mind when approaching recruiters? -- Shy Senior, Rochester, N.Y.

DEAR SHY SENIOR: Keep your focus on your goal -- to find a job. Be clear about what type of job you want. Make sure your resume expresses your interest in that particular job and your experience in that area. Do your research to find out which recruiters represent jobs in your area of interest. Seek those particular people out as you move through the job fair. If you can, create a checklist of who you would like to meet in advance and get a map of the job fair. It will be easier for you to go to each targeted recruiter rather than feeling like you have to search through an endless sea of people.

When you approach a recruiter, make eye contact and offer a firm handshake. State your name and say that you have looked him or her up and believe that you might be a good fit for the company. Having done research in advance shows that you are a strategic thinker and a planner. The recruiter will probably appreciate that and invite you to talk. When you talk, stick to the facts at first. Say why you want to pursue your area of interest. Answer any questions you are asked. As you loosen up, share things about yourself that reveal your uniqueness. Follow up with a thank-you note expressing gratitude for the opportunity to meet the recruiter. State that you hope to be considered for the position you discussed.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My assistant, a recent college grad, wears some inappropriate things to work sometimes. She has come into my conservative law office wearing purple sparkling nail polish, shorts and high-heeled pumps and, on occasion, jeans. Everyone else except the people in the mailroom wear suits -- women and men both. For her job interview she wore a conservative business suit, so I didn't have a reason to believe that she would turn into what looks more like party girl. I like this young woman and want her to succeed. How can I tell her that she's making the wrong choices? -- Improperly Clad, Chicago

DEAR IMPROPERLY CLAD: Consider it your duty as her boss and seemingly her mentor to educate her about how to succeed in your industry and your company. She needs to learn that the corporate culture dictates that she be conservative and modest in her attire, including her nail color. Point out specifics on how she has veered off course. Show her people in your office who are dressed for success. Suggest that she plan her attire within the boundaries of what she sees. Somewhere in there she can cultivate her own style.