life

Debt Relief Companies Are Too Good to Be True

Sense & Sensitivity by by Harriette Cole
by Harriette Cole
Sense & Sensitivity | March 6th, 2014 | Letter 1 of 2

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been noticing commercials for companies where they can take your debt and basically make it go away. Like, if you have a bunch of credit card debt, the companies can reduce the amount you owe and get the creditors off your back. It sounds crazy, but since there are so many commercials about it, I figure it must work. Otherwise, how could they afford to buy the commercials, right? I have a mound of debt and can't figure out how to get free of it. I'm wondering if I should try one of these things. -- Dump Debt, Jackson, Miss.

DEAR DUMP DEBT: Things that seem too good to be true tend to be exactly that. Debt settlement companies are popular in that they do help consumers to reduce their credit card debt, but typically the consumer is left with plummeting credit scores.

What experts recommend instead is to work with a federally accredited company that is affiliated with the Independent Consumer Credit Counseling Agencies. CNBC personal finance correspondent Sharon Epperson says that you want to work with a reputable company that can help you create a budget and strategically dig yourself out of debt. Typically, these nonprofit companies offer support free of charge. To learn more about the support you can get through these agencies, visit aiccca.org/.

life

Sense & Sensitivity for March 06, 2014

Sense & Sensitivity by by Harriette Cole
by Harriette Cole
Sense & Sensitivity | March 6th, 2014 | Letter 2 of 2

DEAR HARRIETTE: My wife and I are in a financial bind because of her indecisiveness. She has been unemployed for two years now, and she is the only person I know who can secure various job interviews but never gain full-time employment. My wife has dreams of opening a day care center in our community. I have the money for her open the day care center, but I still need some help managing the monthly household expenses. I asked my wife if she could find a job while she works toward the day care opening. I believe in my wife's dream; however, I still need her to help me pay some of these bills around the house. Do you think I am being too pushy? -- The Partnership, Memphis, Tenn.

DEAR THE PARTNERSHIP: Sounds like you need to create a budget that gets you to your goals. Let it include exactly how much additional money your family needs your wife to earn in order to reach that figure. You may find that having her work in a focused manner on all the details of the day care facility is most cost-effective. If your calculations show that you really do need the extra income, help her to recognize that and assess what kind of part-time work would be the smartest to seek. Then help her look for it. Stop thinking she can't find a job. That could be a self-fulfilling prophecy. Instead, encourage her to find a way to help your family make its dreams come true.

Instead of being pushy, work together with your wife as a team to get to your goal.

life

Daughter's Dandruff Is Easily Treatable

Sense & Sensitivity by by Harriette Cole
by Harriette Cole
Sense & Sensitivity | March 5th, 2014 | Letter 1 of 2

DEAR HARRIETTE: My 7-year-old daughter has dandruff. I don't understand it. I wash her hair thoroughly and condition it well. She doesn't share hairbrushes with other children. She has dandruff that you can't even believe. I need to get this under control. -- Flaky, Salt Lake City

DEAR FLAKY: Guess what? Dandruff is a common scalp condition for children and adults. I know that doesn't make it any easier for you to handle, but it is important to know that you are not alone in your struggle to get your daughter's dandruff under control.

Experts suggest that dandruff may be caused by a number of things, including not washing the hair often enough or even washing it too much. Oily skin or particularly dry scalps can be culprits as well. Skin conditions like eczema or psoriasis may be contributors. Even the weather or dryness of the air can pose a higher chance for you to experience dandruff. (See The Mayo Clinic's thoughts here: mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/dandruff/basics/causes/con-20023690).

There are many over-the-counter solutions that have worked for people, including Selsun Blue and Sulphur 8. I can tell you from experience that neither of these products has a winning aroma, but they work when used together. If you use over-the-counter products that do not work in a few weeks' time, go to your daughter's pediatrician for more help.

life

Sense & Sensitivity for March 05, 2014

Sense & Sensitivity by by Harriette Cole
by Harriette Cole
Sense & Sensitivity | March 5th, 2014 | Letter 2 of 2

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am so jealous of my single friends. They seem to have so much fun hanging out at new restaurants and being invited to all the cool stuff while I am juggling work, my husband and our toddler. Don't get me wrong; I love my family, but I miss being able to have even a little bit of fun with my girlfriends.

I don't get invited to anything anymore. I know I'm not part of the "in crowd," but I thought my friends wouldn't drop me just like that. Once my son was born, they came over to visit a little bit and bought me presents, but after a few months -- crickets. I feel so isolated. I love my husband, but he doesn't want to talk about all the stuff that my girls and I used to talk about. I am beginning to make friends with a few moms, but I don't want to lose my single girlfriends entirely. What can I do? -- Lonely, Denver

DEAR LONELY: Your life has transitioned, but your heart hasn't settled yet. Your life is completely different from those of your single girlfriends. They have time to hang out. They do not have your same measure of responsibilities. They also do not have your same return on investment, at least from a family perspective. You may be surprised to learn that one or more of them may envy you.

Envy and jealousy will not help matters here. Arrange with your husband to clear one night every couple of weeks when you can spend time with your friends. Call and let them know you miss them and want to hang out with them. Ask if they are up for a biweekly or monthly date. You can have your cake and eat it, too, though the slice may be smaller!

life

Reader Must Ask Brother for Money

Sense & Sensitivity by by Harriette Cole
by Harriette Cole
Sense & Sensitivity | March 4th, 2014 | Letter 1 of 2

DEAR HARRIETTE: I went on a trip with my family as a special tribute even though I couldn't afford it. My brother said he would reimburse me for the cost of travel to help ease my burden. I thought that was so nice of him. He is busy with his work and his life, and he forgot to give me a check or cash when we were all together. Several weeks have passed, and he still hasn't sent me the money. I called him once to remind him, and he assured me he would do it right away. I feel horrible having to grovel for this money, but I would not have attended had he not promised to pay my way. What can I do? -- Broke, Cincinnati

DEAR BROKE: You can call your brother again and remind him to send you a check or wire you the money. It is easy to do now through services like PayPal or Chase QuickPay, among others. Tell him you need it right away.

In the future, don't put yourself in that position. Do not spend money that you don't have. If you have to miss family events or other activities, miss them. Focus on getting your finances straight, and then you can be clear on what you are able to afford. A simple and powerful book to read is "The One Week Budget: Learn to Create Your Money Management System in 7 Days or Less," by The Budgetnista.

life

Sense & Sensitivity for March 04, 2014

Sense & Sensitivity by by Harriette Cole
by Harriette Cole
Sense & Sensitivity | March 4th, 2014 | Letter 2 of 2

DEAR HARRIETTE: Another source of halitosis that is not commonly known is from "cryptic tonsils." My dentist didn't even know what they were when he used a pick to extract a glob of white, hardened food debris showing under the skin from the back of my mouth. I could see it, but had no idea what it was.

I went to my ENT, who told me that some people's tonsils have indentations, or "crypts," around the tissue, which leads to food accumulating and decomposing, hence the bad odor. I went back to my dentist and asked the dental assistants, who had not heard of this source of halitosis either. I Googled "cryptic tonsils" and found home-care solutions from Internet users who had the same problem. Now I am very careful not to eat soft white bread and to clean my teeth and mouth after everything I eat. I also use my finger (in the privacy of my bathroom) to search around those areas where food might be accumulating and smell my fingertip to see if there is an odor. Then I work at getting the offending food particles out. I am surprised that this is not more common knowledge. Sometimes all the breath mints and mouthwash in the world do not help someone if cryptic tonsils are the problem. -- Clean Mouth, Chicago

DEAR CLEAN MOUTH: I really appreciate your input as well as the many people who have written in with their experiences of halitosis and its causes and prevention. What is clear is that there are many reasons that people can suffer from bad breath. Many of them are health-related and extend far beyond whether they brush their teeth thoroughly.

The first stop when dealing with halitosis can be your dentist, followed immediately by your internist so that you can get to the root of your problem.

Next up: More trusted advice from...

  • Last Word in Astrology for May 27, 2023
  • Last Word in Astrology for May 26, 2023
  • Last Word in Astrology for May 25, 2023
  • Woman Fails to Act Her Age According to Son and DIL
  • Brothers’ Rivalry Continues Into Adulthood
  • Husband Plans to Strike It Rich on YouTube
  • My Fear of Feeling Irrelevant is Real, and Gosh, It Is Painful
  • My Old College Roommate’s Back, Negative Energy and All. Help!
  • How Will I Face Mother’s Day Without My Mother?
UExpressLifeParentingHomePetsHealthAstrologyOdditiesA-Z
AboutContactSubmissionsTerms of ServicePrivacy Policy
©2023 Andrews McMeel Universal