DEAR HARRIETTE: I went on a trip with my family as a special tribute even though I couldn't afford it. My brother said he would reimburse me for the cost of travel to help ease my burden. I thought that was so nice of him. He is busy with his work and his life, and he forgot to give me a check or cash when we were all together. Several weeks have passed, and he still hasn't sent me the money. I called him once to remind him, and he assured me he would do it right away. I feel horrible having to grovel for this money, but I would not have attended had he not promised to pay my way. What can I do? -- Broke, Cincinnati

DEAR BROKE: You can call your brother again and remind him to send you a check or wire you the money. It is easy to do now through services like PayPal or Chase QuickPay, among others. Tell him you need it right away.

In the future, don't put yourself in that position. Do not spend money that you don't have. If you have to miss family events or other activities, miss them. Focus on getting your finances straight, and then you can be clear on what you are able to afford. A simple and powerful book to read is "The One Week Budget: Learn to Create Your Money Management System in 7 Days or Less," by The Budgetnista.

DEAR HARRIETTE: Another source of halitosis that is not commonly known is from "cryptic tonsils." My dentist didn't even know what they were when he used a pick to extract a glob of white, hardened food debris showing under the skin from the back of my mouth. I could see it, but had no idea what it was.

I went to my ENT, who told me that some people's tonsils have indentations, or "crypts," around the tissue, which leads to food accumulating and decomposing, hence the bad odor. I went back to my dentist and asked the dental assistants, who had not heard of this source of halitosis either. I Googled "cryptic tonsils" and found home-care solutions from Internet users who had the same problem. Now I am very careful not to eat soft white bread and to clean my teeth and mouth after everything I eat. I also use my finger (in the privacy of my bathroom) to search around those areas where food might be accumulating and smell my fingertip to see if there is an odor. Then I work at getting the offending food particles out. I am surprised that this is not more common knowledge. Sometimes all the breath mints and mouthwash in the world do not help someone if cryptic tonsils are the problem. -- Clean Mouth, Chicago

DEAR CLEAN MOUTH: I really appreciate your input as well as the many people who have written in with their experiences of halitosis and its causes and prevention. What is clear is that there are many reasons that people can suffer from bad breath. Many of them are health-related and extend far beyond whether they brush their teeth thoroughly.

The first stop when dealing with halitosis can be your dentist, followed immediately by your internist so that you can get to the root of your problem.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am feeling totally stressed out, and I cannot sleep. I have been having verbal fights at work over what seems like a thousand disagreements on basic things. It is irritating me to no end. Honestly, I feel like the weather is getting everybody crabby and the littlest thing is setting people off. I want to help change the mood in the office, but I don't know how. I think our team is a good one. My co-workers are usually nice people, even though they are not acting nice at all right now -- me included. I am in charge of this team, and I think it is my responsibility to do something. What can I do to make things better? -- Crabby, Detroit

DEAR CRABBY: You've taken the first step by acknowledging that you are not in a good mood and that it is affecting your work and your relationships in the office. Could the weather be a part of it? Possibly. This has been the worst winter on record in decades.

What you may want to do is go to work with a refreshed attitude and point out the obvious. Tell your team members that you realize you have not been in a good mood and it seems like nobody else has been either. State your epiphany that the nasty weather has contributed to your all-around negative state. Ask your team if they know what you mean and how they are feeling. Find out if there are any specific issues that need to be addressed workwise, and see if you can help manage them.

Present the team with hot chocolate and cookies or some other such treat to show that you want everybody to have a happy moment and ease up on the tension. Ask them to work with you and each other to be kinder and gentler through this tough season.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just saw myself in the mirror, and I am horrified. I don't know why I didn't notice that I have gotten fat. It seems to have crept up on me. I'm no hermit or anything. I have been busy living and working and, yes, eating, I guess. I don't really think I eat all that much more than I used to. Now that I am in my 50s, everything has changed, including my body. I don't want to be fat, but I bet I need to lose like 50 pounds. Should I join one of those diet programs? I am so embarrassed. -- The Real Biggest Loser, Chicago

DEAR THE REAL BIGGEST LOSER: Believe it or not, your reflection in the mirror was the best thing that could have happened to you. Now you know for certain that you have work to do. Start by getting a complete physical. Check to see if you have any underlying health concerns that need to be addressed. Ask your doctor to refer you to a nutritionist.

Start to move your body. You can decide to walk every day. Or exercise to a video. Join a gym if you think you will go. Many people go to WeightWatchers to help them get on track. Take action now!

DEAR HARRIETTE: I went to my sister's apartment to visit my niece, her boyfriend and their baby girl. I was happy to see the new bundle of joy. During my visit, I saw my niece and her boyfriend argue about whose turn it was to hold the baby. At first I thought it was cute that the young couple wanted to hold the child; however, as time went on, I noticed they became more aggressive, calling each other names that I felt were not appropriate. I did not like their behavior, and I expressed my concern. I suggested to my sister that she should keep an eye on her new grandchild and her daughter. I thought my conversation with my sister was in confidence, but that was not the case. My sister told my niece everything I said, and my niece sent me a nasty email telling me to mind my business. I plan to visit my family in two weeks, and I would like to know how I should address my concerns without being told off. -- Family First, Chicago

DEAR FAMILY FIRST: In the life of a newborn, two weeks can seem like an eternity. Rather than holding onto what you saw during your last visit, be in the present when you visit again. Bring an upbeat, loving attitude to the new family. Offer to be of help in whatever way they need. If the boyfriend is there, be kind to him.

While it is wise to notice aggressive behavior, especially around children and babies, you cannot control what happens with this young couple. Many couples with newborns experience stress and have to learn how to manage it. Rather than rehash any experiences or feelings from the past, do your best to be supportive of the new family. Of course, if you ever see anything occur that could be considered putting the child in danger, say something immediately.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am on cloud nine thinking about my future wedding, and I have already mapped out my wedding day. My fiance thinks I am too controlling because I picked out my own engagement ring, but I still afforded him the opportunity to propose to me when he thought the time was right. I like being in charge and I do not think I will change, but I worry that my independence may cause some trouble in my future household. How do I let my husband "wear the pants" while I still manage our relationship? -- Have My Cake and Eat It Too, Syracuse, N.Y.

DEAR HAVE MY CAKE AND EAT IT TOO: I think of marriage as a dance, one that includes slow, intimate moves and independent, jerky ones. As with any good dance, it does call for someone to hold the vision for the couple. That said, it's best if both spouses understand and agree upon that vision.

Your perspective right now of wanting to be in control is not the healthiest way to enter into a marriage. You can bet that your husband will not appreciate your desire to run everything just as you wouldn't appreciate him wanting that very same role.

I recommend that you two go to marriage counseling and talk through roles and responsibilities, values, hopes and dreams.