DEAR HARRIETTE: My grooming habits have taken a serious nosedive as of late, and I think it's affecting the office climate at my place of work. I'm aware of what I need to do to take care of myself, but my current financial situation tells me I have to pick and choose what I can pay for. For example, I used to go to the barbershop every two weeks, and now I go every two months. I welcomed the extra hair on my face because it's been beneficial bracing against the brutally cold weather we have had as of late. Secondly, I haven't been able to clean my clothes on a consistent basis. I am embarrassed because I really care about the way I look. I need some advice because I want to become better. -- Grooming is Important, New York City

DEAR GROOMING IS IMPORTANT: First, review your whole situation. If you are working at a place that does not afford you enough income to handle your basic hygiene, you may be working at the wrong job. That said, even with limited means, it is possible to stay clean, neat and tidy. Regarding your hair, you can purchase an electric razor and grooming kit and cut your hair yourself. Many men do so. It may seem daunting at first, but it can save you thousands of dollars over time. Second, you can wash your clothes at home. If you do not have access to a free washer, use good old elbow grease. Put your clothes in the tub with soapy warm water. Soak them, scrub them, rinse them and hang them.

By paying attention to yourself before you leave your home, you can make a difference, even if you have limited resources. Bathe thoroughly, wear clean clothes and learn to do everything you can on your own to cut costs.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My wife is driving me crazy because she has not had our baby yet. The expected due date was last week, and she is ready for the baby to come out. My wife has become really cranky, and she wants to rip my head off if I bother her with any nonsensical questions. I will be so excited when this baby comes out because I will not have to worry about her mouth. In the meantime, how can I keep my wife calm during this waiting period without losing my mind? -- Any Day Now, Memphis, Tenn.

DEAR ANY DAY NOW: Anticipating an overdue baby is hard for both mother and father. Hormones are surging inside your wife. Anticipation is at an all-time high for both of you. Be a thoughtful listener through this period. Resist the temptation to tell your wife what to do. She does not need a lecture, even though this is often the way that men express their concern. Tell her you love her. Tell her you are happy to do anything she would like. Questions can be irritating. Observe her instead, and be ready to take action when you notice she has a need. Make sure the bag is packed and at the door, that you have your insurance card handy and that you are ready to drive to the hospital when the time comes.

DEAR HARRIETTE: A good friend of mine went away for rehab for an eating disorder about a year ago. She called and told me about it, and for the next few months she talked about it a little. I think she had gained about 3 pounds and needed to gain about 30. I rarely see her since we don't live in the same town. I want to check in with her to see how she's doing. Do you think that's OK? -- Concerned Friend, Syracuse, N.Y.

DEAR CONCERNED FRIEND: Since your friend welcomed you into the conversation about her health, you have permission to bring it up again. But be sensitive. You can call and ask her how she's doing and if she is making strides with her eating disorder. Offer your love and support, and listen to see if she wants to talk. Don't press her, though. Tell her you want to support her in any way that you can. For more ideas: nationaleatingdisorders.org.

DEAR HARRIETTE: Please, please, please tell "Unsafe," whose next-door neighbor at her dorm has been using social media to threaten her life, to print out copies of the Facebook posts and tweets to support her position and keep a record of every interaction that she and her friends have with this girl. Also, Unsafe should never be alone with her. Racism, regrettably, is alive and well in this country, and this neighbor sounds especially mentally unbalanced. My fear is the neighbor may accuse Unsafe of something, and she desperately needs to protect herself.

A very good friend of mine, a gentle and kind man who does volunteer work for the homeless with his wife, saw his car getting hit by another car while it was parked. When he went outside to assess the damage with his brother, the woman who hit his car sped off. He thought that was the end of it, but a few moments later, police showed up and arrested him. The woman who hit his car accused him of assaulting her! She had never left her car, and they had never even exchanged words. He stood trial, and even though he had a witness and she didn't, he was found guilty, spent 30 days in jail, got 13 months probation and has a conviction on his record forever. Why did this woman do it? It's not clear, but she had no license and no insurance.

My friend's crime? He's African-American, and the police chose to believe the woman's story rather than my friend and his brother. -- Unfair, Chicago

DEAR UNFAIR: When we see extreme behavior seemingly triggered by race, it is very important to tell the authorities. Indeed, this is true whether the behavior is racially motivated or not. In our country, we have recently witnessed too many arguments turn violent with people getting hurt, violated or wrongfully accused. Remaining vigilant and getting support immediately when you notice unsafe behavior from others -- friend and foe alike -- could end up saving your life.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a lateness problem like nobody's business. I work part-time for this really cool woman, and I like the work that we do. She is interesting, and so is her work environment. I wish it were full-time, but she pays regularly, so it is cool. That should mean that I would get my rear up and get to work on time, right? I never seem to get it together on time. My alarm clock doesn't go off, or I lose track of time, or I don't leave in time to get the train. Something seems to get in the way all the time. To her credit, she has been pretty cool about the situation. She likes me and has said so. She even told me last week that I have to get it together -- not just for her, but for myself. I know she is trying to help me, but I keep messing up. What can I do to become an on-time person? -- Standing in My Own Way, Bronx, N.Y.

DEAR STANDING IN MY OWN WAY: Get out a piece of paper and make two columns. In one column, write down all of the things that you appreciate about your current job. Be as specific as possible. In the other, write down all of the things you do that ruin your success. Review your list, and ask yourself if your self-sabotage is worth it.

If you truly enjoy your work, figure out how to honor it by being on time. Can you get up an hour earlier? Set multiple alarms. Review the train schedule, and plan to arrive a half-hour early. Give yourself permission to be on time because you deserve the rewards that come with punctuality. By establishing little disciplines that help you to remain mindful of timeliness, you can master your organizational and psychological challenges surrounding this issue and be free of tardiness!

DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter's best friend has hamsters. One just had six babies. Needless to say, my daughter wants one of them. I am allergic to furry animals, and while I would love to accommodate my daughter, I know that tending to this animal, cleaning it, etc., would ultimately fall on my shoulders, since my daughter is just 9. I am not interested in inviting an allergen into my home. How can I break it to her? -- Ha-Choo, Atlanta

DEAR HA-CHOO: I doubt this is the first time you have told your daughter that you have allergies. It is time to remind her. Explain that you are fine with her visiting her friend and her hamsters -- at her house -- but that you cannot have any as pets at your house because they will make you sneeze. Be specific so that she gets it. Remind her to wash her hands thoroughly after handling her friend's pets -- for her own hygiene and before engaging with you.