DEAR HARRIETTE: My mom told me that my 10-year-old cousin passed away. My family went to the funeral, but I could not go because I was working a summer job and was not allowed to leave. Everyone else visited with my uncle either before or after the funeral except for me. I usually call and check in, but I hadn't talked to him since she passed. I felt uncomfortable addressing her death because I didn't know how he was doing. I wanted to be able to talk to him and be supportive of him without stepping over personal boundaries regarding where he was in his personal journey, so when I called I didn't mention my cousin's death and neither did he.

Now, six months later, we still haven't talked about it. How do you talk to a family member about the death of his child in a way that is respectful of his space, but also thoughtful? Should I leave it alone since he hasn't mentioned it? Or is it okay to talk about it? -- Sad and Unsure, Rochester, N.Y.

DEAR SAD AND UNSURE: Losing a child is one of the most difficult losses a parent or family can experience. That you were unable to be there for the funeral and to participate in that rite of closure is making it challenging for you to handle personally, in addition to your concern about your uncle.

For your own good, talk to your mother about your thoughts and feelings, and talk to a school counselor if you need more support. In addition, continue to contact your uncle to check in on him. When you feel comfortable, you can ask him how he is managing. But there's no need to pry. You may want to wait until you next see him to talk about your shared loss. If you haven't connected before her birthday, be sure to contact him then to tell him that you miss her on her special day and that you love him.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have never written in before, but after reading the letter from "On the Brink" today, I knew I had to write. While your answer addressed the parenting issues involved in the problem [of a young girl whose mother bought her a training bra and whose father did not approve], it didn't address that this girl might be developing earlier than her husband's sister.

When a girl starts wearing a training bra should absolutely not be based on age. It should be based on when she needs one. If my parents had waited until I was 13 before allowing me to wear a bra, I would never have owned a training bra, as by that age I was already developed enough to require a real bra.

This husband has not thought this through if he thinks his daughter is better off wandering around junior high with growing boobs and no support. Not only is it uncomfortable, but I can also assure you that her classmates (the boys especially) will notice -- and talk. Anonymous, Chicago

DEAR ANONYMOUS: Young people in puberty are often terribly sensitive about their developing bodies. Anything parents can do to support them, they should. This can require managing expectations of the parents themselves.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am going to celebrate my 40th year on this earth in a couple of days. Friends from across the country will come to Memphis to celebrate my big day. Love is going to fill the room, and I am looking forward to partying with my guests, but one man coming to my party is different. I really like him, however I don't think he knows that I like him. How do I start a conversation with him without being embarrassed? -- It is My Party, Memphis, Tenn.

DEAR IT IS MY PARTY: I'm not sure that your party is the place to break the news to your friend. I suggest that you enjoy your party and pay attention to all of your guests. Bask in the glow of reaching this special age and having so much love around you. Be open to noticing if this man shows any particular affection toward you, but do not act on anything.

What you can safely do is invite him to go out for lunch or dinner or another activity on another day where the two of you can talk to each other without an entourage and music that will likely be distracting. In terms of reducing embarrassment, I say embrace your 40s! You have just stepped into a space where you have earned the experience to be confident and clear in your needs and desires. When you are one-on-one, tell this man that you would like to see if there's something more than friendship in your future. Ask him if he would like to find out.

DEAR HARRIETTE: The problem of the sensitive reader who asked for help with her personal shopper friend with halitosis can be solved. My wife had the same problem even if she brushed her teeth every morning and evening. Halitosis is caused by the presence of germs in the mouth that work on food and other residues in the mouth. It is necessary to get rid of the germs.

I solved my wife's problem by simply changing the storage of our toothbrushes. Her toothbrush was the source of the germs that caused the halitosis. My wife was re-inoculating her mouth every evening with the germs that caused the halitosis. I changed the toothbrush storage container to one containing antiseptic mouthwash so that her toothbrush was no longer the source of germs that were causing the problem. When her toothbrush no longer contained any of the halitosis-causing germs, the halitosis problem was solved. Once a toothbrush is contaminated with germs that cause halitosis, the brush must be stored in a container that kills the germs. -- Fresh and Clean, Detroit

DEAR FRESH AND CLEAN: You are right that halitosis is caused by germs. You made a smart choice to start using a germ-killing receptacle to house your toothbrushes. Sometimes the obvious is overlooked, so thanks for the reminder.

I have also spoken to dentists and medical doctors who explain that sometimes the germs that cause halitosis can be within the body, ranging from blood disease, gum disease and even diabetes. So for those with chronic halitosis, a trip to the doctor is strongly recommended.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm feeling overwhelmed by social media. I was advised to sign up for Facebook, Twitter, Google Plus, LinkedIn and a few others, so I did. Meanwhile, I have a busy job that I love and a family. Here's the thing: I find that people write to me on all of these platforms, and it is hard for me to manage answering them or even keep up in a timely manner.

I was offered an opportunity the other day on LinkedIn but didn't notice for more than a week. When I followed up, it was too late. On Facebook, I feel like it's mostly family and friends telling silly stories. When they write to me, I don't feel a sense of urgency, but they often do.

How do I juggle all this stuff so that it works for me and not against me? I don't want to be rude to anyone or hurt anybody's feelings, but I can't seem to keep up. -- Bad Juggler, Baltimore

DEAR BAD JUGGLER: You are not the first person to be worn out by social media. Like anything else in your life, you do have to figure out how to balance your responsibilities. You can start by evaluating which of the social media outlets is most beneficial to you. Do that by considering what is important in your life. If you want to build a network of contacts professionally, LinkedIn can be very useful for you. If you want to stay in touch with friends and family, Facebook is easy to engage. If you like visual interaction better, Instagram and Pinterest work really well.

After deciding which social media outlets are your priorities, make a decision to devote 20 minutes once or twice a week to checking your various social media accounts. If you maintain a rhythm that makes you feel comfortable, those who engage you will learn to respect it.

DEAR HARRIETTE: In the past few weeks, several people I have known for a very long time have died. All of them died young. One was a child who was hit by a car. Another passed out at a party and never recovered. Another died of breast cancer. I am only 40 years old. I always thought that death happened frequently when you got old. I feel numb after all of these sad events, and I am not sure how to react. I feel like I am not spending my time wisely. I hadn't talked to any of these friends in weeks or, in one case, years. I want to make my friends a priority, but right now I just feel sad. -- Stunned, New York City

DEAR STUNNED: Sudden, unexpected death of loved ones can definitely send one into an emotional tailspin. It proves to you that nothing is promised in life. It reminds us all that we need to make the present moment count. What you can do moving forward is to make a list of the people you care about and literally place a checkmark by their names as you get in touch with them. Commit to calling and seeing your loved ones more regularly. Don't wait to express your love. This can help you heal and strengthen your current bonds.

You can also be in touch with the families of the deceased to offer your condolences and support as they grieve.