DEAR HARRIETTE: I am going to celebrate my 40th year on this earth in a couple of days. Friends from across the country will come to Memphis to celebrate my big day. Love is going to fill the room, and I am looking forward to partying with my guests, but one man coming to my party is different. I really like him, however I don't think he knows that I like him. How do I start a conversation with him without being embarrassed? -- It is My Party, Memphis, Tenn.

DEAR IT IS MY PARTY: I'm not sure that your party is the place to break the news to your friend. I suggest that you enjoy your party and pay attention to all of your guests. Bask in the glow of reaching this special age and having so much love around you. Be open to noticing if this man shows any particular affection toward you, but do not act on anything.

What you can safely do is invite him to go out for lunch or dinner or another activity on another day where the two of you can talk to each other without an entourage and music that will likely be distracting. In terms of reducing embarrassment, I say embrace your 40s! You have just stepped into a space where you have earned the experience to be confident and clear in your needs and desires. When you are one-on-one, tell this man that you would like to see if there's something more than friendship in your future. Ask him if he would like to find out.

DEAR HARRIETTE: The problem of the sensitive reader who asked for help with her personal shopper friend with halitosis can be solved. My wife had the same problem even if she brushed her teeth every morning and evening. Halitosis is caused by the presence of germs in the mouth that work on food and other residues in the mouth. It is necessary to get rid of the germs.

I solved my wife's problem by simply changing the storage of our toothbrushes. Her toothbrush was the source of the germs that caused the halitosis. My wife was re-inoculating her mouth every evening with the germs that caused the halitosis. I changed the toothbrush storage container to one containing antiseptic mouthwash so that her toothbrush was no longer the source of germs that were causing the problem. When her toothbrush no longer contained any of the halitosis-causing germs, the halitosis problem was solved. Once a toothbrush is contaminated with germs that cause halitosis, the brush must be stored in a container that kills the germs. -- Fresh and Clean, Detroit

DEAR FRESH AND CLEAN: You are right that halitosis is caused by germs. You made a smart choice to start using a germ-killing receptacle to house your toothbrushes. Sometimes the obvious is overlooked, so thanks for the reminder.

I have also spoken to dentists and medical doctors who explain that sometimes the germs that cause halitosis can be within the body, ranging from blood disease, gum disease and even diabetes. So for those with chronic halitosis, a trip to the doctor is strongly recommended.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm feeling overwhelmed by social media. I was advised to sign up for Facebook, Twitter, Google Plus, LinkedIn and a few others, so I did. Meanwhile, I have a busy job that I love and a family. Here's the thing: I find that people write to me on all of these platforms, and it is hard for me to manage answering them or even keep up in a timely manner.

I was offered an opportunity the other day on LinkedIn but didn't notice for more than a week. When I followed up, it was too late. On Facebook, I feel like it's mostly family and friends telling silly stories. When they write to me, I don't feel a sense of urgency, but they often do.

How do I juggle all this stuff so that it works for me and not against me? I don't want to be rude to anyone or hurt anybody's feelings, but I can't seem to keep up. -- Bad Juggler, Baltimore

DEAR BAD JUGGLER: You are not the first person to be worn out by social media. Like anything else in your life, you do have to figure out how to balance your responsibilities. You can start by evaluating which of the social media outlets is most beneficial to you. Do that by considering what is important in your life. If you want to build a network of contacts professionally, LinkedIn can be very useful for you. If you want to stay in touch with friends and family, Facebook is easy to engage. If you like visual interaction better, Instagram and Pinterest work really well.

After deciding which social media outlets are your priorities, make a decision to devote 20 minutes once or twice a week to checking your various social media accounts. If you maintain a rhythm that makes you feel comfortable, those who engage you will learn to respect it.

DEAR HARRIETTE: In the past few weeks, several people I have known for a very long time have died. All of them died young. One was a child who was hit by a car. Another passed out at a party and never recovered. Another died of breast cancer. I am only 40 years old. I always thought that death happened frequently when you got old. I feel numb after all of these sad events, and I am not sure how to react. I feel like I am not spending my time wisely. I hadn't talked to any of these friends in weeks or, in one case, years. I want to make my friends a priority, but right now I just feel sad. -- Stunned, New York City

DEAR STUNNED: Sudden, unexpected death of loved ones can definitely send one into an emotional tailspin. It proves to you that nothing is promised in life. It reminds us all that we need to make the present moment count. What you can do moving forward is to make a list of the people you care about and literally place a checkmark by their names as you get in touch with them. Commit to calling and seeing your loved ones more regularly. Don't wait to express your love. This can help you heal and strengthen your current bonds.

You can also be in touch with the families of the deceased to offer your condolences and support as they grieve.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boss is addicted to reality TV. That wouldn't normally matter to me or anybody else at work except that she watches on the job. I'm not kidding. Even when we are busy with a project that has a strict deadline, I can walk into her office and catch her watching one of the "Housewives" shows or some other one of those crazy programs.

I can't believe my eyes sometimes. Once when I came in to talk to her about a project, she shushed me and said that we would talk after her show went off. I have no power at my job, so I don't even know what I can do. I want to say something to her, but I wonder if it is worth it. Otherwise we have a really nice relationship, so I think she might hear me if I dare speak up. -- Frustrated, Los Angeles

DEAR FRUSTRATED: Wow! This is an interesting problem to have. To get your boss to pay attention to your concern, you have to catch her when her shows are not airing. Request a private meeting with her if that is possible. Do your best to make it at a "safe" time and place where there are limited distractions.

Be honest with your boss, and tell her that you are concerned that it is hard for the team to get work done in a timely manner when she is constantly watching TV. Acknowledge how addictive these programs can be and recommend that she invest in TIVO or another such recording feature so that she can watch them on demand.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband has a major issue with the IRS because he always files late, if at all. I keep telling him that he shouldn't mess around with them. Everybody has to file and pay taxes, right? He just seems to drag his feet on getting it done. When I offer to take over and get his paperwork to the accountant, he shrugs it off.

I'm not really sure what the problem is. It's not like he makes a lot of money. But we would be screwed if the IRS garnished his wages, which is what the last letter said would happen if he doesn't respond. I'm scared. What can I do to help? -- Fearful, Chicago

DEAR FEARFUL: Ask your husband to agree to a family meeting with you at a particular time. Bring the paperwork to that meeting and show him what the threat is. Suggest that you work on this together. Remind him that your accountant is prepared to help you file the back papers. The accountant can also call the IRS on your behalf immediately to let them know that you are preparing to comply. Indeed, you two can call yourselves to alert them that you intend to meet the most imminent deadline. If you miss the deadline that promises a lien or garnishment of wages, you could be too late to stop that action, which will destroy his credit. To learn more about your risk, go to www.irs.gov/irm/part5/irm_05-011-005.html.

There are companies that help people avoid garnishment as well. Be careful to verify that the company is legitimate if you choose to work with one of them.