DEAR HARRIETTE: My job requires me to use the Internet to gather information for various projects in a timely manner; however, I find myself logging onto Facebook and Twitter to update my status and to see what my friends are doing all day long. I really want to concentrate and focus on the work I have to do during business hours. Can you help me create a strategy to help me stay focused? I could be a more effective worker. -- Easily Distracted, Newark, N.J.

DEAR EASILY DISTRACTED: What you can do is think about your career and your future. Seriously consider the steps that you can take to be successful in your work life. Write down a list of what you can do to improve at your job. Include time management on your list. Imagine how much more efficient you can be if you stay focused on the task at hand.

Each day, make a written list of what you have to do. Write out each task on a separate line, and check off each item when it has been successfully completed. This can help to keep you in line.

Finally, think about the consequences of continuing to be distracted by your personal social media. You could potentially lose your job if you spend too much on those websites.

DEAR HARRIETTE: Recently, my husband and I have gained a lot of weight. I know why: We have been eating rich food every day and drinking wine every night. We know that this is causing us to bulk up, but it makes us happy. We actually have not been this happy together in years. So, we don't want to stop. Obviously, this is not rational thinking. What can we do to develop healthier habits and stay happy? -- Fat and Happy, Los Angeles

DEAR FAT AND HAPPY: You can start by moving your bodies. Why not take a walk together after dinner? Ease into being more active with each other. At the same time, you can begin to make smarter food choices. Switch out starchy foods for green vegetables. Cut back on butter and bread. Eat dinner earlier than your normal hour. Do not eat and then go straight to bed. Reduce your alcohol intake. Start off by reducing it to one glass of wine per night with the goal of reducing your alcohol intake to one or two nights a week.

Remember to take your time in this process. Talk to your husband about it so that he knows you are looking to do something to improve your health. Ask him to support you in this effort. Look for recipes for healthier meals. Invite your husband to help prepare special meals with you. What makes for a happy marriage is great communication coupled with respect. If you travel on this journey to a healthier life together, chances are you can slim down and stay happy!

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a 41-year-old African-American man, and I decided to see a psychologist to discuss a few of my personal issues. I told my uncle that I went to see a therapist. He applauded my decision, and he told me it takes a strong person to admit that they need help. My aunt thinks it is foolish of me to talk to a counselor. Since my first visit with the therapist, I feel better. I am getting the help that I need. How do I defend my decision about seeing a therapist to my family members? -- On the Couch, Brooklyn, N.Y.

DEAR ON THE COUCH: Many people do not understand the value of professional psychological help. Your aunt is one of those people. That's her issue, not yours. Do your best not to make it your issue.

How you can best manage this situation is to talk to your therapist about your issues, not your family. There is no need for you to update anyone about your progress with the therapist or about any breakthroughs or challenges that you may have. It is none of their business.

Focus on getting healthy. By keeping your mental health treatment private, you give yourself space to explore your thoughts, feelings and issues in a safe space.

DEAR HARRIETTE: Lately, I have noticed that I am transposing numbers and missing words on documents at work on a regular basis. My mistakes are starting to become a strain on my boss. I recently purchased a new pair of glasses to see if they would correct the problem; however, I am still making the same mistakes. I spoke to my boss about my problem, and she suggested that I might be dyslexic. I plan to take a test to see if I am dyslexic, but I am a little embarrassed because I am in my late 30s and I did not know about this potential learning disability at an earlier age. How should I carry myself while I am looking for a place to take this test? Should I tell people about my potential condition, or should I keep quiet until I get my test results? -- To Tell the Truth, Memphis, Tenn.

DEAR TO TELL THE TRUTH: Keep your thoughts to yourself for now. Schedule an appointment with your internist and get a complete physical. Ask about being tested for dyslexia. Be prepared to talk about what some of your challenges are at work and in life. Some symptoms of dyslexia include difficulty reading, writing and spelling. Doctors say that people with dyslexia often have difficulty with organization and time management. For a full list of symptoms, visit interdys.org/SignsofDyslexiaCombined.htm.

If you discover that you do have dyslexia, it doesn't mean that you need to advertise your condition. Get support to help you tackle your challenges. Many successful people suffer from dyslexia. It is not a death sentence.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been dating my boyfriend for almost seven years now. We met in college and started dating at ages 19 and 20. I am now 26. I love him a lot, and I know how much he loves me. We talk about marriage and our future all the time, and I know that he is "the one." How long should I wait for him to propose? Should I give him an ultimatum? -- Ready to Wed, Jersey City, N.J.

DEAR READY TO WED: When you talk about marriage, what does he say? Have you ever talked about timing for getting married? If not, why don't you introduce that question into the conversation?

It is also just fine for you to propose. I know it may not seem the traditional route, but many women have proposed to their partners. Give it some thought!

DEAR HARRIETTE: A few months ago, my best friend and roommate moved across the country, so I had to find a new roommate. I met a super sweet girl on Craigslist, and I have been rooming with her for the past five months. We get along great. I feel very comfortable with her in the space, and I get along with her boyfriend as well. There's just one thing. She doesn't clean. I wouldn't say she's a slob, because she's not, but she never cleans the bathroom or Swiffers the kitchen, she leaves breadcrumbs everywhere and I always have to re-wash the dishes she does because they're never clean.

I have mentioned these things to her on two occasions and even spoke of a schedule (which she hasn't followed), and I don't want to sound like a nag. Aside from this, she has been a really great roomie. What should I do? -- Want to be Clean, Syracuse, N.Y.

DEAR WANT TO BE CLEAN: It's time to have a household meeting. Tell your roommate that you want to talk about household duties. Start by telling her how much you enjoy her as a roommate and how at ease you have felt since she arrived. Then, very clearly talk to her about chores and point out that you need her to pay closer attention to cleaning the apartment. You might ask her if anyone ever taught her how to clean. It is possible that she doesn't really know how to be an effective cleaner.

If that is the case, offer to teach her. And show her what you think she has not done so well. For example, show her dishes that still have food residue on them and then teach her how you would clean them. Suggest that you clean together for a while. That way you can show her how you clean the bathroom and the floors. It could be as simple as educating her to get your house clean.