DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been dating my boyfriend for almost seven years now. We met in college and started dating at ages 19 and 20. I am now 26. I love him a lot, and I know how much he loves me. We talk about marriage and our future all the time, and I know that he is "the one." How long should I wait for him to propose? Should I give him an ultimatum? -- Ready to Wed, Jersey City, N.J.

DEAR READY TO WED: When you talk about marriage, what does he say? Have you ever talked about timing for getting married? If not, why don't you introduce that question into the conversation?

It is also just fine for you to propose. I know it may not seem the traditional route, but many women have proposed to their partners. Give it some thought!

DEAR HARRIETTE: A few months ago, my best friend and roommate moved across the country, so I had to find a new roommate. I met a super sweet girl on Craigslist, and I have been rooming with her for the past five months. We get along great. I feel very comfortable with her in the space, and I get along with her boyfriend as well. There's just one thing. She doesn't clean. I wouldn't say she's a slob, because she's not, but she never cleans the bathroom or Swiffers the kitchen, she leaves breadcrumbs everywhere and I always have to re-wash the dishes she does because they're never clean.

I have mentioned these things to her on two occasions and even spoke of a schedule (which she hasn't followed), and I don't want to sound like a nag. Aside from this, she has been a really great roomie. What should I do? -- Want to be Clean, Syracuse, N.Y.

DEAR WANT TO BE CLEAN: It's time to have a household meeting. Tell your roommate that you want to talk about household duties. Start by telling her how much you enjoy her as a roommate and how at ease you have felt since she arrived. Then, very clearly talk to her about chores and point out that you need her to pay closer attention to cleaning the apartment. You might ask her if anyone ever taught her how to clean. It is possible that she doesn't really know how to be an effective cleaner.

If that is the case, offer to teach her. And show her what you think she has not done so well. For example, show her dishes that still have food residue on them and then teach her how you would clean them. Suggest that you clean together for a while. That way you can show her how you clean the bathroom and the floors. It could be as simple as educating her to get your house clean.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been somewhat casually dating a guy for more than a year now. We like each other a lot, but we see each other rarely. He has a young son, and he has primary custody, so between family and work, he is busy. I had the thought recently to tell him that I would be fine with spending time with him and his son if it meant we could spend more time together. I'm a little nervous about suggesting it, though, since he has never brought it up. What do you think about this idea? -- Next Step, Memphis

DEAR NEXT STEP: Leave it alone. I generally recommend to anyone who has children and is dating that you do not introduce the date until you feel that there is potential for the relationship. It can be unnerving for children to meet a range of dates and not be sure who is important to the parent. While you shouldn't wait until you are about to get married, you should feel that the relationship is more committed than your description -- casual. Follow his lead on this.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I wear a weave in my hair. I spend a lot of money on it, so it looks just like my hair. I've been dating a guy for a few months now, and it has gotten a bit intimate. So far, whenever he kisses me, I make sure he doesn't touch my hair. He has complimented me on it a lot, and I am always grateful. I wonder if he finds out that it isn't my real hair if that will turn him off. Bottom line: I need to tell him, but I'm not sure how to broach the topic. Help! -- Woven, Detroit

DEAR WOVEN: Chris Rock made a compelling documentary called "Good Hair" that explores many of the nuances of the hair industry, including how men and women deal with women who wear weaves. One of the men in the documentary pointed out that he doesn't touch his partner's hair without permission -- ever!

Jokes aside, this is a fair question. Because so many women wear weaves these days, you may be pleasantly surprised to discover that your guy is not new to the party. That said, in order for you to be comfortable with him touching your hair, you need to let him know what's there. It could be presented in a casual conversation about going to the hairdresser. As you talk about your schedule, tell him that you go to the hairdresser once every six or eight weeks to have your weave refreshed (or whatever your timetable is). You can mention how long that appointment is, and note the commitment you make to keeping your hair looking the way you want it to look. This will open the door to a candid conversation about your hair. If he asks to touch it after that, by all means allow him to do so.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I took my daughter and her friend out for Halloween, and it started off great. We went trick-or-treating in a neighborhood that is famous for many of the residents participating with candy and decorations -- they even have a haunted house. This is where we had our problem: My daughter's friend freaked out when we began walking through the house, and she literally froze in her steps. Her screams were different from the normal screams in a place like this. She was scared to her core. I was able to guide her out of the haunted house, and we then went home. It was frightening for all of us, including my daughter. Also, my daughter didn't get to enjoy the haunted house. The girl's mother didn't join us because the girl wanted to go with just us. It would have helped a lot to have her mother there. Do you think I should require that a parent come with any child that joins us next year? Our children are 9 years old. -- Spoiled Fun, New York City

DEAR SPOILED FUN: You named it. Especially for an event like Halloween where children and adults in costumes are milling about at night, is it smart to have more than one adult chaperoning the children. As you experienced, if there is an attraction that one child is against, it is much easier to manage each child's expectations if you have more than one adult in the group. In the future, I would require that each child have a parent in attendance.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband complains about something every day. From the moment that my son and I wake up, he has something to say about what we are doing or not doing. When he comes home from work there it is again: something we did wrong. I am fed up. My son is dragging around. When I bring this up to my husband, he says I am being too sensitive. I may be sensitive, but I am certain that there is good in our lives, along with whatever we are doing wrong in his eyes. How can I get him to see that? -- Fed Up, Chicago

DEAR FED UP: When you can carve out a private moment, sit down with your husband and check in with him. Ask him about his day, about what's going on in his life. He sounds frustrated and stressed. It may be that something is happening with him that has nothing to do with you or your son, but, unfortunately, you are experiencing the brunt of his short temper. See if you can learn what's troubling him.

Also, do tell your husband that you are concerned that he doesn't notice the good things that occur in your family. Point out that you want your son to feel loved and supported rather than criticized all the time. Let him know that while he may not realize it, he often picks at each of you. Ask him to work with you to begin to notice and celebrate one thing each day about each other. This will help all of you to come together in a positive way. You can lead the charge in pointing out the good things. Start by noticing something great about him!