DEAR READERS: Once again we are solemnly at the anniversary of 9/11, a day that we will never forget. Sadly, it is part of our nation's history that reminds us that there is always a tug between freedom and vulnerability.

I remember pre-9/11 when I went to the airport and did not have to take off my shoes or be frisked or subjected to a body scan. I remember when people moved with relative innocence from one place to another, not imagining that a random person might want to do them harm.

While in large part our nation remains the great meeting ground of opportunity, plenty and openness, it is constantly being plagued with the question of whether we are safe.

In our recent past we have had all manner of tragedies, from the Boston Marathon bombings to random shootings in schools such as Newtown, Conn., and Atlanta, as well as the movie theater in Aurora, Colo. We have experienced controversial killings, most recently that of Trayvon Martin. Whether fired by weapons aimed out of fear or hatred, our nation's very skin has been riddled with bullets that threaten our soul.

And yet, we will never give up hope. In the year that we commemorate the 50th anniversary of the March on Washington for Freedom and Jobs, we remember that even in times of need, sorrow or sadness, there is more good in our nation than bad.

In this moment when we honor the innocent fallen who lost their lives on that tragic September day, we must take a pause and contemplate where we are today, individually.

In peaceful reflection we must search our souls to see how we can contribute to the promise that is the international draw of this great country. What can we do to grow peace and prosperity? I do not mean this rhetorically. Literally, I implore us all to ask ourselves this question.

At any given moment we are faced with choices. We can choose to help quiet restless members of our families and neighborhoods. We can choose to direct our own steps toward loving communication and thoughtful acts. We can choose to take a deep breath and not lash out at our loved ones when we or they are in a fit of frustration. We can choose to stand up for our neighbors and co-workers and friends when others have done them wrong. We can choose to report a crime that has been committed, even when it would be easy to turn our heads. We can choose to be responsible for doing our part to keep our country healthy and safe.

The question is: Will we? Too often we go about our daily lives putting one foot in front of the other without consciously thinking about where we are going. Too often we hurt the people we care about the most. Or scapegoat the weak in order to promote ourselves. Too often these things happen without our even realizing it.

I believe one way that we can protect our great country and our beloved families is to wake up. We can start our day with the intention of being our best selves, knowing that if we exemplify honorable living, others may too. It's that Golden Rule. It still applies.

DEAR READERS: So many people responded to the question about how to handle the situation when visiting a friend whose parent has a gun that I thought I would run a few of them for your review.

Gun ownership and gun safety are hot-button issues right now. Many of our nation's cities continue to be plagued by gun violence. Too often we hear stories of little children accidentally killing their siblings because they got their hands on some adult's gun.

I spoke to a friend who is a gun owner recently who talked about how views and uses of guns are dramatically different from region to region. Indeed, this is true. Often, the debate is about guns in urban settings. But in the case of the initial question, it was essentially about a child visiting a home where guns are stored and how to protect the child. Here's what some of you had to say:

DEAR HARRIETTE: If "Gun Shy" really wants to keep her kid safe around ALL guns and not just the ones her friends has, ask him to take her son and his kids to a gun range. Take the mystery out of what damage a firearm can really do, and the kids will realize it is not like in video games. There is no reset button for real people. -- Gun-wise at an Early Age, Chicago

DEAR HARRIETTE: Believe it or not, 8 years old is a great time to learn about gun safety. Check with your local Cub Scout packs. There are some very educational and entertaining safety presentations available that don't involve handling guns. -- Savvy, Racine, Wis.

DEAR HARRIETTE: Though I'm not a National Rifle Association fan, I do own guns and occasionally shoot. My additional advice to your reader would be, whether or not he or she decided to let the child go to the friend's house, consider taking a hunter's safety class. The class teaches about guns and how to handle them in a safe environment. Students learn to treat all guns as being loaded and dangerous at all times. No one has to shoot a gun, but this knowledge may save someone's life. In Michigan's hunter's safety classes, people are taught that it is NOT cool to point guns for fun and that they should be kept locked up. Gun locks and safes should be used in all gun-owning homes, and kids should not be given the combination to it/them. Parents who don't lock up their guns are negligent.

A friend equated gun safety with being a safe driver. She said, "You can't be a safe driver if you've never been taught how. So how can you be safe with or around guns if you've never been taught how? A car can be just as lethal as a gun, maybe more so." It really made me think. -- Mindful, Auburn, Mich.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I live in a brownstone that has been split into small apartments. I live in one room, and the landlord's daughter lives on the other end of the hall. We share a bathroom. When I signed my lease, it was with the agreement that only the two of us would share the bathroom. The daughter's boyfriend, however, basically lives in her room. He's slept there every night for the past two months. I do not appreciate having to share the bathroom every night and morning with two people. That was not our agreement. How can I address this without creating a stink? My room is tiny, and I pay premium rent. -- Crowded Out, Brooklyn, N.Y.

DEAR CROWDED OUT: Reach out to your landlord and express your concern. If you made an agreement that was specific to how many people live on your floor and use the shared bathroom, you certainly have the right to point out that this third party has essentially moved in. Expect a little pushback, though, since it is the landlord's daughter's boyfriend who is the person in contention. Press either for him not to be a permanent fixture or for your rent to be reduced.

DEAR HARRIETTE: In response to "Overheated," the worker who wants to wear shorts to work, I have worked in a human resources department, and the problem with letting people wear shorts to work hinges on how short the shorts are. The problem with telling employees that they can wear Bermuda shorts (to the knee) is that after a while, the shorts usually get shorter than that.

When I first started working, most women wore skirts and blouses, and in the summer it was much better than long, hot slacks. They can be dressed up with a sweater set or blouse and a short jacket. It looks professional, and it can feel cool for those who wear them. -- Old School, Chicago

DEAR OLD SCHOOL: Yes, my dear, you are right. If you simply stay away from shorts in the workplace, you will be much better off. In this time of the casual workplace, I fear that many women may consider a skirt and blouse dressy rather than comfortably casual. This is not true for everyone.

Your look back at appropriate work attire is refreshing in both practical and professional ways. Being aware of the message that you are sending to others based on the way you present yourself is important. It matters what you wear to work. My position is that you should always dress for success, whatever that means for you and your place of business. This includes on casual Fridays, hot days, inclement weather days, etc.

An easy way to be appropriate on a daily basis is to review what you have to do for the day and select a wardrobe that will make you feel comfortable throughout the day. I also recommend keeping a jacket in your workspace, if you can. A jacket can dress up most outfits in case you have to interface with a supervisor or a client.