DEAR HARRIETTE: I ran into a woman the other day who was my roommate when I first moved to town. It has been years since we last saw each other. At first she didn't recognize me, but when I reminded her, we had a big hug. I'm wondering if I should do anything more after this. We exchanged cards, but mostly as a pleasantry. We were not friends. We somehow were roommates along with a few other people when we were in our 20s. Do I follow up with her since we shared our numbers? If so, what should I say? I am not trying to kindle a friendship with her; I just want to be appropriate. -- Protocol, Bronx, N.Y.

DEAR PROTOCOL: To acknowledge your reconnection, it would be thoughtful to send a quick email saying how nice it was to run into her after so many years. Add a compliment about her or your exchange, and wish her well. You do not need to suggest that the two of you get together in the future or anything else that is an empty overture. Just honor the moment by commenting on it. If she responds and actually wants to get together, you can do so if and when you have time. There should be no expectation of building a relationship on either side.

DEAR HARRIETTE: Summer is over, and I had a good time. But I feel kind of bad that I did not get to connect with some of my close friends. Time seemed to slip by, and just the other day I called a friend who I have not seen in a long time and we had a great talk. It got me to thinking: Time is so fleeting, and I didn't make time for her this summer. It's too late to do anything about the summer, but how can I make my friends more of a priority? I don't want to be the girl who works all the time and rarely catches up with the people she loves. -- Disconnected, Atlanta

DEAR DISCONNECTED: Getting organized and prioritized can help you to manage your relationships better. For years I have kept a daily to-do list that includes work responsibilities as well as home, family, friends, etc. I used to write down "drink water" every day because I was not making that a priority. Similarly, many people do not make connecting with loved ones a requirement.

Review your friend and family base. Remember the people you speak to often and those who you have been meaning to contact. Write down all of the names that come to mind. Now look at your calendar for the next three months. Pencil in different names on days when you believe you have time to talk for a few minutes. You can choose one evening a week after work or a weekend morning. Be sure to set aside enough time for a conversation if you actually reach the person. You can also send emails or handwritten notes to loved ones, telling them that you are thinking of them. These overtures count!

DEAR HARRIETTE: A good friend had a hip replaced this summer. She sent an email asking for her friends to buy groceries and otherwise help out while she recuperated. She included me on the outreach list, and I responded right away. But I did not follow up to ensure that I had duties to fulfill. Now, several weeks have passed, and I have done nothing. I got busy with my family and work, and I honestly forgot. I am so embarrassed. I want to reach out and see if she needs anything now, but I feel like such a loser for not calling earlier. What should I do? -- Late to the Party, Syracuse, N.Y.

DEAR LATE TO THE PARTY: It is never too late to express your love to one in need. By all means call your friend and check in to see how she is doing. Ask her about her recuperation. Be a good listener. Chances are she will be happy to hear from you and will be more than willing to give you an update.

Ask her if she needs anything now, if there is anything that you can do to support her during this leg of her healing process. Promise to call her again soon, and then remember to do so.

Resist the temptation to make the conversation about yourself by going through a litany of reasons why you have not called previously. Keep the focus on her and the moment. What can you do now to be of help?

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was told that I am prediabetic. My doctor wants me to go to a nutritionist and try to get a handle on my health. I am so upset. Diabetes runs in my family, and I have worked hard not to get it -- until a couple of years ago, that is. I was depressed about a lot of things, and I stopped exercising and started eating and drinking the wrong things. Now I am paying the price. I don't want to tell my family. I can already hear "I told you so." Honestly, I don't want to do anything. I just want it to go away. That's stupid, I know. But I feel stuck. How can I snap out of it? -- On the Verge, Salt Lake City, Iowa

DEAR ON THE VERGE: Take one step at a time. If your doctor gave you a number for a nutritionist, call and schedule an appointment. A professional can be enormously helpful in getting you on the right track toward a healthier life. Pay close attention to the recommendations you are given, and follow them to the best of your ability.

You need to decide that you deserve to be healthy. This includes acknowledging that it is possible NOT to walk in your family's footsteps if you take the proper measures now. It is likely that you will be given an eating and exercise regimen to follow. Give yourself the gift of doing these things, one day at a time. Each day that you choose your health, you are choosing life. Get psychological support if you can to help lift any lingering negative thoughts. You can do it!

DEAR HARRIETTE: On a few occasions, I have asked my neighbor if she could baby-sit my child while I go to work. My neighbor said yes, and that made me happy. I brought my child over to her house, which smelled like cigarette smoke. My neighbor assured me that she goes outside to smoke and it would be no problem to bring my son to the house. I went to pick up my son after work, and he smelled like smoke. I was very upset; she told me I would not have to worry about her smoking. My neighbor really helps me when I am in need, and I do not want to cause any strife between us. How do address the situation without severing our relationship? -- Upset Mom, Chicago

DEAR UPSET MOM: This moment calls for trusting your instincts. When you dropped your son off, you knew the house smelled of smoke. Yes, you were in a bind because you had to go to work, but that doesn't change that you were aware of the smoke in her home. Indeed, she could have smoked outside on that day, but if the house is generally a place where she smokes, the smell probably lingers. That means that anyone hanging out in the house, sitting on furniture, even just being there will pick up that smell.

Bottom line: If you do not want your son in the company of secondhand smoke, do not leave him in her care. Figure out an alternate support system for when you are in a bind. And be sure to thank her for having your back this time as she has in the past. Leave her smoking out of it.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I cannot believe that the summer is almost over and I have to go back-to-school shopping for my three children. In a perfect world, I would love to have enough money to purchase the clothing my children really want; however, that is not the case for me. Where can I find clothes that are fashionable that I can afford without embarrassing my children in the process? -- Shopping Mom, Brooklyn, N.Y.

DEAR SHOPPING MOM: Start by taking inventory of what your children have and what can be used again either by the original owner of the clothing or by a sibling. Hand-me-downs are important wardrobe stretchers, especially for families with multiple children -- when it can work.

Determine exactly what your children need -- underwear, a sweater, shoes, trousers, etc. Be mindful of the difference between wants and needs, and discuss this with them.

Now, start looking online. Figure out which stores are having back-to-school sales and what the percentages are for discounts. Department stores often host deep discounts at this time of year. Consider resale shops, including Goodwill and Salvation Army. They often have great finds at low prices.

When you shop, buy only what is a necessity. Remember: You do not have to make all your purchases right now.