DEAR HARRIETTE: I am in college, and I am in a relationship with a great guy. However, there is one huge problem: He is a Mormon, and he wants me to become a Mormon as well. I have always respected him and his beliefs because I love him, but I do not want to convert. Deep down I find the religion somewhat comical. How do I tell him that I do not want to convert? I am afraid it can ruin the relationship, and I fear that this will cause us to break up. -- Not Religious, Boston

DEAR NOT RELIGIOUS: As you contemplate your next steps, it is very important for you to be respectful of your boyfriend's religion. Right now you are being judgmental, which is a surefire way to end your relationship.

I can tell you that many people who are deeply religious strongly urge their partners to convert to their religion. There is merit in that -- it's easier to build a family with shared values. Though you are in college, since you are getting serious with this young man you need to consider what you want your future to look like. What are your values? What is important to you in a relationship? As you think of family? As you consider how you want to live your life, talk to your boyfriend about it. Whether he ends up being the one or not, it is smart for you to be open and honest about who you are and what matters to you.

Ask him about his beliefs. Get him to talk to you about his religion, what he believes and why. Without judgment, listen to see if there is common ground.

DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my best friends is really close with a girl I hate. She is inconsiderate, obnoxious and condescending. Everyone else who is also friends with my best friend cannot stand this friend either. Recently, my best friend asked why I always avoid activities when we are in a group setting. I don't know how to tell her that I want to avoid this girl. I don't want to hurt my best friend's feelings. How do I deal with this situation? -- Alienated, Syracuse, N.Y.

DEAR ALIENATED: Why not tell your friend the truth? She may not realize how uncomfortable you and other friends are because of that other person's behavior. Let her know that you do not like being in this person's company because it of her attitude.

I would like to take this a step further and suggest that there is no reason why you cannot speak directly to this other person. What you are now doing is bottling up negative energy about her. Saying that you "hate" her is strong. Let go of the hate, and empower yourself by speaking up to her the next time she says something inappropriate or insulting. Ask her to stop with the disparaging comments or keep her distance.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My wife and I work for companies that require us to travel 85 percent of the year, and we rarely see each other. Last week I saw my wife a total of five hours. We are feeling the strain of not being together, and I am looking for solutions. What are some ways my wife and I can maximize our moments together? -- On the Road Again, Brooklyn, N.Y.

DEAR ON THE ROAD AGAIN: You and your wife need to get organized. Review your schedule for the next three months. Write down everywhere you know you will be, including when you both will be at home. Figure out if you can visit each other at any of your business stops along the way. Schedule phone calls and Skype times so you are sure to communicate every day. By all means, schedule a vacation when you can be together without the pressure of work.

Looking at the big picture, determine together how long you believe you can live with this extreme travel schedule. Some couples are able to manage for years. Others buckle under the pressure of not being together very often. You two will have to figure out how well you are managing with so much time apart. Check in regularly to ensure that you both continue to be comfortable with the decisions that you make.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I received a phone call from a former business partner a few weeks ago. He is interested in having me work with him on a project that has the potential to be very lucrative. The offer sounds interesting, but I have some major reservations about working with him again. My friend told me to give him call in two weeks with an answer, and I am planning to decline his offer. I am worried that our relationship as friends will be strained because of my declining the offer. How can I make sure our friendship will be undamaged? -- Unfriended, Queens, N.Y.

DEAR UNFRIENDED: Business is business. Speak to your friend directly about your decision not to work on the project with him. Be clear that you do not want to work on this project and out of respect for him you want to let him know right away. Thank him for extending the invitation to you.

You can never control how people will respond to you. You can improve your chances of having a positive outcome, though, by being forthright and kind as you communicate with him. Tell him you value your relationship too much to be indecisive, and this particular project is not right for you at this time. If he has a problem with that or tries to persuade you further, stick to your decision. If you can think of someone to refer him to who may be interested, do that. But do not give in. Trust your instincts. Time will tell whether he gets over it or not.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend and I have been together for about five months. He works from 3 p.m. to 11 p.m. I've been friends with his brother for five years and with his sister-in-law for 20 years. His brother and I almost dated a few years ago, and his sister-in-law and my boyfriend dated in the past. Every time I go over to their house to hang out with them while he's at work, he seems to get upset about it. They have children around my daughter's age, so she can play with her friends. I've asked him what his problem is with me going over when he's at work, and he said he doesn't have a problem with it. I don't go over when he's home because I want us to have alone time then. I'm not sure whether to see them anymore or not. -- Torn, Shreveport, La.

DEAR TORN: It sounds like your combined relationships with your boyfriend's family are layered, to say the least. Your boyfriend may consciously or even unconsciously be a bit concerned that you being at their home without him may lead to some kind of intimacy. Is that a fair concern? Who knows?

Out of respect for him, you should honor his wishes and not go over there right now. Instead, go with him the next time you are together. Even though it seems counterintuitive, it isn't. Give up a little alone time to spend as a family with your daughter and all of them. Let your boyfriend get comfortable around everyone. Once he feels at ease, he may change his mind about being OK with you going there without him.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just read your response to "I Am Not Even Hungry." Although the response was "sensible," I suggest that you investigate the 12-step program Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous.

For those of us who have experienced compulsive eating, it has been the answer to our prayers.

If possible, the best use of your time would be to attend a meeting. There are no fees, weigh-ins or sign-ins, only a request for your first name so we may welcome you.

In the future, we hope you will want to include our website, foodaddicts.org, along with the recommendation to see a doctor. -- In the Know, Ann Arbor, Mich.

DEAR IN THE KNOW: Thank you very much for sharing information on dealing with food addiction. You are absolutely right that 12-step programs can be amazing supports to people who are struggling with a range of addictions. This is true for people with other eating disorders as well.

I hope that anyone who is reading this who is struggling with a food addiction would reach out for help right away. It is possible to beat this illness. Getting help is essential.