DEAR HARRIETTE: The other night my friend's boyfriend was hospitalized under very mysterious circumstances. They were together for most of the evening and everything was fine, but 30 minutes after she left she received a text saying he was in an ambulance. He was texting people and coherent while there, but when she demanded to know what was wrong he said, "I'm fine, don't worry" and neglected to answer any further texts. Rumors were flying that it was "severe abdominal pain," but not even his friends know what was wrong. He was back home the next morning. He is still avoiding any questions regarding the incident. She is really worried that there is something wrong because now he is being strange and avoiding her. How can she help him or figure out what the problem is without making him withdraw further? -- Worried, Sleepy Hollow, N.Y.

DEAR WORRIED: Unfortunately, your friend cannot force her boyfriend to reveal his health status. It is his personal business. Pestering him will never work. Instead, she should remain supportive and give him his space if that is what he needs right now.

If they are physically intimate, she may want to withdraw from that part of their relationship until he shares what is going on. When he asks why she is refusing him, she can say that she is concerned about his health and wants to know that everything is OK before crossing that line again.

DEAR HARRIETTE: How can I improve my organizational skills? I am going away to school next year, and up to this point in my life I have had serious issues with procrastinating. I tend to do my best work under last-minute pressure, but it doesn't leave much space to get outside advice. Also, if I have a lot of projects at once, it tends to get very stressful. For some reason I have a mental aversion toward scheduling or doing things in advance. How can I help myself with these problems? -- Trouble with Time, Boston

DEAR TROUBLE WITH TIME: I am a big believer in lists. I write down in numbered lists all of the tasks and responsibilities that I have on a daily basis. Throughout the day, I check back to see if I have fulfilled the items on my list. When I do that, I am better able to keep track of my obligations.

This also makes it easy to avoid missing deadlines or other important tasks. I highly recommend that you look at your schedule and map out a plan for success. You can do this by listing the tiny steps that lead up to the big steps. It can be daunting to look at the big picture alone. Breaking your responsibilities down into manageable parts will help you to build a ladder to success.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I live in New York City, and I am sure you know that rent is crazy expensive; therefore, I have a roommate to help out. She was a friend of mine prior to becoming my roommate. It seems that living with her is a lot more difficult than just being friends. She is always trying to outdo everything I do as if there is some competition. If I say that I want a certain bag or if I am dating a great guy, she always has to try to one-up me. I don't know how to address the issue without sounding harsh or mean. Could you give any advice on how to approach her? -- Mocked, Staten Island, N.Y.

DEAR MOCKED: It is heart-to-heart time. Sit down with your roommate and tell her you want to talk about something that makes you feel uncomfortable. Point out that now that you live together you have noticed that she likes to copy everything you do. Give her examples, such as the bag or even the date. Suggest to her that if your roommate relationship is going to work, you both need your space. That includes space to express your individuality without feeling that your roommate is going to steal your style or your friends.

One thing to note, though, is that roommates often share items, clothing and friends. You need to decide together where the boundaries lie. Bringing it out into the open will help to dispel any discomfort that exists.

DEAR HARRIETTE: The letter from "Tolerant" said that the woman on the cellphone on the train "was causing no more disturbance than a person carrying on a conversation with someone sitting next to her." However, what is annoying about listening to someone on a cellphone is that she usually talks louder than when she's having a conversation with someone sitting next to her. That is why people, myself included, get so annoyed. The person on the cellphone is in her own world and forgets that there are others present who are forced to listen to her conversation. -- Annoyed, Syracuse, N.Y.

DEAR ANNOYED: You have a point. Many people do speak louder when they are talking on the phone. What is fascinating about this letter and the reaction to it is that so many people have comments. My mailbox has been flooded with input from all over the country.

Here's a bottom line about someone talking on the phone on the train: It is a public, yet confined, location. This means that others who are around the person talking do not have the opportunity to step away or tune out the conversation. This is the same for someone having a face-to-face conversation that is loud enough for all to hear in a public setting.

We all need to be more conscious of those around us and more mindful of whether we are taking them into consideration when we are sharing space with them.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I enjoy reading your column, and I find your advice straightforward and refreshing. However, I think you may have missed the boat about the man in an interracial relationship whose family doesn't support the relationship. The only detail he provided was that his girlfriend is black and has kids. Perhaps his family objects because there is a major age difference between them, or maybe she's been married multiple times and they worry about him committing to someone who doesn't have a good track record regarding relationships. Maybe they are worried about him becoming an instant dad to the children.

I completely agree that if the family doesn't approve of the relationship because the woman is of a different races it is an outdated shame. But I suspect there may be more to the story. Just wanted to put that out there. -- Another View, Jackson, Miss.

DEAR ANOTHER VIEW: Thank you for your insight. It is possible that race is only one factor in the parents' lack of support for this coupling. What I hope, in any situation like this, is that the parents would speak up and say what their concerns are so that the adult child can hear what they are thinking and be able to respond as an adult.

What happens all too often is that parents pass judgment, for whatever reason, and put up an emotional fence. When this occurs, the couple may retaliate and get married without even considering the parents' point of view. In the end, this can lead to fractured relationships all around, including the fledgling marriage.

I am a big believer in communicating respectfully and fully. When that happens, everyone stands a better chance of making informed decisions about the future.

DEAR HARRIETTE: "Chasing a Dream" wrote to you because she wants to go to nursing school at age 61. I'm glad you told her to go for it. I worked in a factory for more than 25 years. I went back to school and got my nursing degree when I was 48! That was 10 years ago. I have been an oncology nurse for all of those years, and I love it! It is NEVER too late. -- Chased My Dream, Too, Chicago

DEAR CHASED MY DREAM, TOO: I so appreciate the many comments that have come in about getting educated at a later age and going for your heart's desire.

Just the other day I moderated a panel, and a woman in the audience spoke about being afraid of being stuck in her mid-level job not knowing how to move up. Of course, ageism does exist, so I did not paint for her a picture of easy street. I did point out that how we think affects what we become. What we say directs our steps. Being able to think, say and act based on the greatest potential you can imagine for yourself opens the door to possibility in your life -- at absolutely any age.