DEAR HARRIETTE: What do you do when you're in a relationship but you want to start dating again? I met this man on Facebook, and I would like to take him out for his birthday. He is handsome, and he is someone with whom I can see myself having a relationship. We started to correspond via email for a few weeks until we exchanged phone numbers. Talking on the phone is just easier. My male friend liked the idea of going out for his birthday, and that made my heart smile.

During one of our numerous conversations, I told my male friend that I was married and that my husband and I have been separated for 15 years. To my surprise, he was taken aback by the statement. He told me that he doesn't want a woman who is married. I told him it was not a big deal. I really like this guy, and I want to see what develops from our friendship. I am not planning to divorce my husband anytime soon. I am lonely and want companionship. What is a woman to do? -- Till Death Do Us Part?, Baltimore

DEAR TILL DEATH DO US PART?: Why are you surprised at your suitor's surprise? I think it is a good thing that a man does not want to date a woman who is married. That you are separated is different from married, and you admit that you are not planning to get divorced anytime soon. Why is that? Are you benefiting in some way from being married to your husband even though you have not been together for years? Is being married a safety for you?

You are living in that space of having your cake and wanting to eat it, too. You are legally married but not with your husband. You are lonely and want companionship, but you are not legally available to receive it. You may want to thank this suitor for making your dilemma so obvious. Do yourself a favor: Take care of first things first. Clear the way to have a healthy new relationship.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My neighbor from back home died several years ago. I was included in his will, which went through years of sluggish movement in the court system. Finally, I have been told what was left to me, and I don't even want it. I feel so stupid having held onto this notion that I was really getting something. What do I do if I don't want it? -- Willed Out, Shreveport, La.

DEAR WILLED OUT: You should have received information from the estate explaining that you do not have to accept the items. Essentially, you need to get in touch with the official person in charge of the dispersion of the will. Explain that while you appreciate your neighbor's gesture, you will be unable to use the item(s) left for you. Suggest that the administrator of the estate dispose of it in whatever way he or she sees fit -- or search for another family member who may appreciate that which isn't right for you at this time.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I walked in on a conversation that my 9-year-old daughter had with one of her friends. At first, I thought they were just laughing and sharing a moment with each other. That was not the case: The girls were saying some bad things about one of their classmates because she wore the same clothes just about every day of the week. I was disappointed and shocked that these words were coming out of my child's mouth. I did not raise her to judge people by what they wear. I am fortunate enough to have resources to make sure that my children are properly clothed. I think I may need to teach my children a lesson about helping the less fortunate. Do you have any suggestions on how I should approach this matter? -- Mom in Shock, New York City

DEAR MOM IN SHOCK: Consider this a teachable moment. You could have spoken to the two girls at the same time, questioning them about their conversation and its tone. In the spirit of clarification, you could have talked to them about the damaging nature of their conversation.

Since you did not, by all means double back to your daughter. Ask her to tell you what she and her friend were discussing. Prompt her to be forthcoming about her conversation, and gently nudge her toward revealing more about the other student and her circumstances. Next, ask her about her life and the privileges that she receives. Do these things make her "better than" that other girl? Chances are she will not say "yes" because you have been teaching her otherwise. Point out that when you make fun of someone because the person is less fortunate than you, the behavior is cruel. Have your daughter consider how she would feel if someone were speaking about her in that way. Do some role-playing with her so that the impact of the unkind words becomes real to her. Make it crystal clear that you do not condone such behavior. Instead of criticizing, what you would prefer would be to see if you could offer the student clothing or other necessities to help make her life easier.

DEAR HARRIETTE: Your recent column in my local newspaper, "Unemployed Man Who Wants Checkup," provided a link for additional information about health coverage for unemployed workers. The link does not indicate what state will provide information for this man, but I think it is California.

Is there a similar link for me? -- Unemployed in Pennsylvania, Scranton, Pa.

DEAR UNEMPLOYED IN PENNSYLVANIA: As I did research to find a source for health insurance for the unemployed in your state, I found something else that is worthy of note. It turns out that nationally, as a result of sequestration, there have been cuts in unemployment benefits nationwide. Unfortunately, you may already be experiencing this. See this link for more information: www.uc.pa.gov/portal/server.pt/community/the_official_pennsylvania_unemployment_compensation_website_%E2%80%93_www_uc_pa_gov/11449.

As it relates to health insurance support while unemployed, there is hope. Visit pennsylvaniaunemployed.org/benefits.php. You can also call the Department of Public Welfare Helpline at 1-800-692-7462.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I disagree on a lot of points regarding parenting. I am actually surprised by some of his views, but I get it -- two people don't necessarily believe all the same things. My issue is that he makes his declarations about how things are going to be in front of our kids without any discussion with me. So, for example, if I am feeding my kids something and he just read that this particular food is not the best, he will reprimand them for eating it as I am serving it. I'm not talking about anything horrible. My husband is into holistic things, and as he learns something he wants to apply it immediately. I have asked him to talk to me about it first, but he never does. What can I do to get him to co-parent with me rather than create a scene on a regular basis? -- Frustrated, Denver

DEAR FRUSTRATED: There's nothing wrong with learning new information and wanting to apply that knowledge to your life. How you do it seems to be what's in question.

When you and your husband are not in the midst of a disagreement, ask him if you can chat. Tell him that you respect his hunger for knowledge about healthy living and eating and that you are interested in what he is discovering. Then, make it clear that you believe it is important to the health of your family that the two of you, the adults, discuss his ideas and agree on a plan of action before anything is conveyed to the children. Tell him that otherwise your children will be receiving conflicting messages on a regular basis and their trust in each of you will erode along with their understanding and clarity on what is best for their lives. Tell him you know he wants the best for them. Suggest that this includes the best way for the two of you to work together. Being a united front is far more effective than spontaneous, inflammatory course corrections.

DEAR HARRIETTE: A boy in my son's class just got a new iPhone. He is in third grade! My son came home jockeying for one for himself. He figured that if his friend could have one, so should he. It is so difficult to teach my child about what's age-appropriate when his peers seem to get whatever they want, whenever they want it. How do I manage his expectations? -- At a Loss, Washington, D.C.

DEAR AT A LOSS: Your job is to teach your child your family's values. You have to be careful not to place a judgment on other families and their choices, but feel free to tell your son that you do not think it is wise to give a child that young such a fragile electronic. Also, explain your policy on phones at his age, whatever that is.

Know that throughout your son's life, especially while he is young, you will be setting his vision for how to live. This will constantly include helping him accept that not everyone makes the same choices, and that is fine. He needs to find comfort in the decisions that your family makes.