DEAR HARRIETTE: I need some help with my husband, who refuses to travel outside of the United States. We have been married for six years, and every year I tell my husband that I want to travel to Paris and Italy for vacation. And every year he politely tells me no.

When I asked why he is not interested in traveling outside of the U.S., he responded, "We can see everything we want right here in the United States." To prove his point, this is what my husband decided to do: Instead of going to Europe, we went to Las Vegas and stayed at the Paris hotel, and we visited the Venetian hotel to ride the gondolas.

I have to admit that we had a great time in Vegas, but I really wanted to go to Europe instead. How can I change my husband's mind about traveling outside the United States? -- Would-be Globetrotter, Chicago

DEAR WOULD-BE GLOBETROTTER: I hope you thanked your husband for his creative attempt to satisfy you and himself. You have to admit that his compromise was clever.

I suggest that you dig a little deeper to try to find the source of your husband's apprehension regarding international travel. Is there something in his past that might preclude him from securing a passport? Did he have a bad experience before meeting you that had to do with international travel?

If he sticks to his guns, begin to talk to him about other options. It could be that his lack of interest in going does not preclude you from going. Perhaps you can go to Europe with some of your girlfriends or with an organized tour group. Indeed, if you go and come back with a wealth of stories, he may change his mind and choose to join you the next time.

DEAR HARRIETTE: A superior sent me a rude email earlier this week. Her request was reasonable, but the way she phrased the email was unnecessarily rude and harsh. I'm not sure if I should bring it up with the other superiors or if it would put them in an uncomfortable position. What should I do? -- Offended, Boston

DEAR OFFENDED: If you can drum up the courage, speak directly to the woman who wrote the email. Request a meeting. Acknowledge the tasks that she requested. If you have completed them, state that fact. Otherwise, tell her when you expect to be finished. Then add that the note was a bit disconcerting for you because it was so harshly delivered. State that you want to do a good job and fulfill her expectations and that it will be easier to do so if she is not so harsh.

Your superior may not respond favorably to your request, but I think it would be best to go to her first before reporting her to others. If you do not feel that you have been heard or acknowledged after talking with her, go to human resources for support.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just saw on Facebook that one of my longtime friends is getting married. She looks so pretty and sounds so excited in her message.

I want to congratulate her, but I don't want to make her feel bad if she isn't planning on inviting me to her wedding. Obviously, I would like to be invited. But I understand how expensive weddings can be and do not have any expectations about going.

How do I congratulate her without asking? I really am not trying to push her one way or the other. -- Well-Wisher, Washington, D.C.

DEAR WELL-WISHER: Be authentically happy for your friend. Give her a call and congratulate her. Invite her to lunch or out for drinks to get caught up and to celebrate her engagement. The point is to acknowledge her good news with an independent invitation that is not attached to a party or the actual wedding.

If she agrees, treat her to the outing and listen to her stories. Most brides-to-be are filled with anecdotes about how the couple met and the upcoming nuptials, news about their families and more.

Be sure to catch her up on your life as well. Be a friend -- without attachments. She will appreciate that you are present and asking nothing of her.

Tell her that you love her and want the best for her. Make it clear that you are not asking for an invitation. You are simply offering her your love.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I finally have time to respond to the mother who is distraught because a rude teacher hurt her child's feelings. I am shocked at this. There is absolutely no excuse for any teacher to be rude to any student -- or to anyone else, for that matter. I call that bullying.

I never, ever even had to raise my voice! Empowering students is more work than being a bully.

It sounds like this teacher has gotten away with this, and as you age, a bad habit becomes worse. This is abuse. She should be fired immediately. -- Old School, Vassar, Mich.

DEAR OLD SCHOOL: I couldn't agree with you more that the administration needs to evaluate this teacher's behavior and decide what disciplinary action will be taken. 

I believe the role of a teacher is at least twofold. Of course the teacher is charged with teaching the students a variety of content. At my daughter's school, they go one step further and pronounce that the teachers should inspire students to become lovers of learning.

Additionally, I believe a teacher's responsibility is to empower students to be confident individuals who believe they can learn, grow and prosper. Bullying does the opposite, because it erodes self-confidence and stymies growth.

It is up to parents to stand up to any teacher who is mean, condescending or otherwise bullying any student in the classroom. That may mean speaking directly to the teacher and/or the principal.

DEAR HARRIETTE: On my last birthday, my boyfriend got in contact with my best friend to plan a celebration. He was really sweet, because he invited two of my closest friends, and it was a surprise. However, my best friend told him that an expensive Italian restaurant was my favorite. That was not true. I don't even like Italian food. The bill was so expensive, and my boyfriend paid for everything.

I feel like my friend sabotaged me. I had a nice evening, but I never would have asked my boyfriend to spend all that money on food I didn't even really like. She bragged the whole night about all she had done to plan the birthday.

I think she's jealous. She doesn't have a boyfriend. She keeps saying how great my life is, but I feel like she's trying to either mess it up or insert herself in it. It leaves me with a bad feeling. How can I get her to chill out? -- Not Happy, Denver

DEAR NOT HAPPY: Your friend sounds a bit confused about how to be friends with you right now. On the one hand, she wants the best for you. On the other, she is envious of all the good things that are happening in your life.

Sit down with her and gently tell her how you feel. Thank her for trying to make your birthday special, but mention that it didn't seem like she actually had your best interest at heart. If she is your best friend, she should know what type of food you like, as well as whether you would appreciate having your boyfriend pay for such an expensive meal. Talk to her about how uncomfortable her actions made you feel. Ask her to think more about you next time.

DEAR HARRIETTE: "Need a Vacation" should not let her husband hold her back from living life! Last year, I wanted to visit my brother in San Diego for two weeks, but my husband said he couldn't get that much time off work. He stayed home and took care of our cats, while our 10-year-old son and I flew to California. We had a great time, including visits to Disneyland and Sea World!

The two of us are going back to San Diego this summer, and my son is so excited. He asked if Daddy was going with us this time. When I said no, he replied, "I guess it's just you and me, pal!" -- Independent Mama, Philadelphia

DEAR INDEPENDENT MAMA: Thank you for sharing your story. I think it is important for families to figure out what works best for them as they navigate life. As you discovered, there may be times when family members do things independently to ensure that dreams are fulfilled. As long as you work together to make your decisions and you have buy-in all around, you can maintain a healthy, happy household and do things together and separately.