DEAR HARRIETTE: There was a lot of good information in your answer to the parent who was concerned about what to tell her children about the Penn State scandal. One crucial point, however, was left out: Parents need to empower their children to tell an adult -- no matter what threats the abuser has made or what the abuser's connection (family member, friend, etc.) is to the child. Encourage children to make a list of trustworthy adults to whom they can report inappropriate events. Remind them to keep telling until somebody listens.

When I was a tween, I was sexually assaulted by a family friend in my own home, but I was not empowered to tell anyone. -- Speak Up, Round Lake Beach, Ill.

DEAR SPEAK UP: I'm sorry to hear about what happened to you and am grateful that you are sharing the wisdom that comes from experience. You are absolutely right that children need to have the courage to speak up and tell their parents and/or key trustworthy adults what happened to them.

I realize that this is much easier said than done. Just to say it out loud once can seem like the most humiliating action. But the only way a victim can be helped is if he or she says something. Too often, sexual predators convince their victims to remain silent, which allows for the horrors of situations like Penn State and too many others to go unnoticed for years.

We must protect our children. Teaching them to speak up when they have been hurt is an essential step in that process.

DEAR HARRIETTE: A friend just asked me to go into business with her on a small venture she is starting. I love the idea of it, but I don't have any extra money to do anything. So when she asked me to contribute $2,000, I told her I wouldn't be able to do it. She got mad at me and said I wasn't being serious. I tried to explain to her that I am willing to work as hard as I can, but if I don't have the money, I don't have it. She's hardly speaking to me now. What should I do? -- Broken Friend, Washington, D.C.

DEAR BROKEN FRIEND: Count your blessings. If your friend isn't open to having an honest discussion about how the two of you can work together based on both of your realities, you don't want to do business with her.

It is often challenging for friends to transition into a business relationship. Guidelines need to be set, and roles and responsibilities defined. That she was unwilling to consider options for how you can work together means that she is not the right business partner for you.

Just so you know, there are many variations on how to structure a business. It is not uncommon for one partner to put up the money and another to do the lion's share of the work or get less equity in the company. Trust that not everybody goes into entrepreneurial partnerships with deep pockets.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My aunt dropped off her cat for me to watch this week. The main problem is that I am severely allergic to cats that shed. This cat sheds fur everywhere, and I'm absolutely miserable, with constant sneezing and head colds. My aunt knows that I am allergic, but she dropped off the cat with no warning and then went out of the country. I feel that it's disrespectful, but I am too nice to mention anything to her about it. How can I politely explain to my aunt that what she did was inconsiderate? -- Can't Breathe, Cincinnati

DEAR CAN'T BREATHE: For your health alone, you must speak to your aunt. While you see her actions as disrespectful, I believe it's more likely that they were unconscious. Your aunt was so busy trying to get her act together to leave town that she didn't think about anybody but herself.

Of course, that is not good. Your health was compromised. Thank goodness you didn't have a worse problem. As you likely know, people with allergies like yours can suffer severe consequences, including literally not being able to breathe.

This is a serious situation. Definitely speak to your aunt and let her know that you cannot take care of her cat again.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am staying with my dad for the summer because my new job is close to his apartment. My mother and father have been separated since I was 4 years old, and I've been living with my mother essentially my whole life.

Although I see my dad on weekends and occasionally at family functions, he and I are not close. Most daughters have a great relationship with their fathers, but that is definitely not my story. I am lucky if we even get an opportunity to eat dinner together. I'm used to not spending much time with him, but there is a part of me that longs to have some sort of connection, even if it's just sitting down together for a meal. How can my dad and I become closer? -- Yearning for Dad, Queens, N.Y.

DEAR YEARNING FOR DAD: Now that you are staying temporarily with your father, you are in a perfect situation. While it may feel awkward since you don't have a history of spending time with him, do not let this moment pass.

Tell your father that you want to get to know him better. State the obvious, and make it clear to him that you want to give it a try.

Tell him that you are planning a special dinner for the two of you on a particular night. Ask him what his favorite foods are. Express your excitement about the possibility of spending this time with him.

In addition, do your best to get up when he gets up so that you can have a few minutes together in the morning. On the weekend, ask if you can go out and enjoy some quality time together.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My assistant comes to work late every day. I have talked to him about it many times. When he arrives, he does a decent job, but it's a problem for me that he comes late -- I'm talking an hour late. I have a small company, and I rely on him. I don't pay him a lot, but he agreed to the salary. I'm afraid that if I fire him, I may not be able to find someone to do the job for the amount I have to offer. What should I do? -- Irritated Boss, Memphis, Tenn.

DEAR IRRITATED BOSS: The level of compromise that you are allowing will not help you to grow your business. Do not tolerate your assistant's lackadaisical behavior. Give him a warning in writing and then fire him unless he immediately becomes professional.

You might be better off having no assistant in-house, and instead hiring a "virtual" assistant to support you. You can arrange to have someone virtually answer your telephone calls, handle correspondence, do bookkeeping -- pretty much anything that doesn't absolutely require a person to be in the room with you. You also can have virtual meetings where you see each other, thanks to Skype and other video communications tools. Such virtual arrangements are a common solution for small businesses these days.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm pretty sure my husband is cheating on me. He has been acting weird. A few times in the past few weeks, he has come home late and smelling of women's perfume. He has not wanted to do anything with me, especially intimately. I am so devastated, but I'm afraid to ask him about it. I don't want to lose him.

My girlfriend told me that she just looks the other way when her husband does what she calls "his business." I don't know if I can overlook it. I want my marriage to be good. What should I do? -- At a Loss, Detroit

DEAR AT A LOSS: If you want to save your marriage, you have to muster the courage to confront your husband. During a neutral time, like a Saturday afternoon when you don't have work responsibilities to pull either of you away from a conversation, tell him you need to talk.

Tell him that you suspect he is having an affair. Ask if he is in a relationship with someone or if he is sleeping with someone else. He may not answer. Describe your fears and the incidents that have made you suspicious.

Stake your claim. Tell him that you want to fight for your marriage and that you are unwilling to share him with another woman. Ask if he wants to stay married and if he is willing to tell you the truth about what's going on.

Push him to be honest with you. If you are to stay married, you will have to figure out how to talk this through and make decisions about the future.