DEAR HARRIETTE: My 10-year-old daughter is going away to her first sleepaway camp. She is so excited about going, but I'm nervous and worried about letting my baby girl go away for a week. I listen to the news and hear about inappropriate behavior from camp counselors. Maybe it's just my nerves, but I want to know how I can ensure that my child will be taken care of while she is at sleepaway camp. -- Mama Bear, Memphis, Tenn.

DEAR MAMA BEAR: Firsts are often tough, especially for parents, so the feelings you are having are normal. However, you can take measures to ensure that your child is safe.

Visit the camp before you send your child there. Talk to the administrative staff about the activities, the process for screening counselors, the procedures regarding campers' physical and emotional safety, and the way campers are taught to reach out in case of emergency. Ask specifically about sexual indiscretion and whether there have been any incidents of abuse at the camp.

Talk to your administrative contact about your child and any idiosyncrasies she may have. Find out when parents can visit. Then relax. Don't make your daughter nervous about her experience. Empower her with an understanding of how camp works. Tell her that she will have a great time and that you will come immediately if she needs you.

DEAR HARRIETTE: It's been nearly one year since our mother's passing, and I would like for my family to do something special in her honor. My mother was a big fan of "Benji movies," and she loved to eat butter-pecan ice cream. My mother really enjoyed the simple things in life, and I would like to do something fun and filled with laughter. Do you have any suggestions for how we can celebrate her life? -- Mama's Boy, Chicago

DEAR MAMA'S BOY: The one-year anniversary is a pivotal time for a family. I'm sure that you have many fond memories of your mother, mixed with continued pangs of loss.

Your idea for celebrating her life with the people who were important to her is a good one. Why not invite family members and loved ones to come over for movie night and memories of your mom? You may want to ask guests to bring a favorite dish and/or a story about your mother. That way, everyone has a vested interest in the evening.

Play one of the movies that your mother enjoyed and pause it for conversation, storytelling and camaraderie. Serve her favorite foods, including that butter-pecan ice cream. Provide a few pens and blank books, and invite loved ones to write down memories of your mother. Cherish her memory.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have two "tween-age" children who have noticed the news stories about sex abuse at Penn State. Even though I try to shield them from certain things, this has flooded the news. Now they are asking me a lot of questions. I'm not sure how to explain this egregious behavior. What should I tell them about the offenses and how to protect themselves? -- Worried Sick, Syracuse, N.Y.

DEAR WORRIED SICK: This is a horrible story that continues to play out on the national stage. But I think the crimes give us an opportunity to talk to our children and better protect them from predators.

Start by asking your children what they have heard about this situation and what their thoughts are. Ask if they understand the crimes that were committed. Listen to them to learn how complete their understanding is.

Tell them that in this situation, a man whom these young people trusted violated their bodies. Remind them of the sacredness of their bodies and of how important it is to walk away from anyone who may want to violate them in any way. Be specific with your children about what other people can and cannot do to them; emphasize that no one should be touching their private parts.

Because they are tweens, they may have entered the stage where they are aware of themselves as sexual beings. Talk to them about their feelings and their developing bodies.

DEAR HARRIETTE: All of my son's friends have taken big vacations this summer. I am a single mom, and with my work hours getting cut, I haven't had enough money this year to take a trip. Even though summer is almost over, I want to do something special for my son. I know that when he goes back to school, he will appreciate being able to say something about his summer. What can I do that isn't expensive? -- Need a Vacation, Washington, D.C.

DEAR NEED A VACATION: You live in a city that is visited by tourists from all over the world. What's often true, though, is that people who live in such destination cities do not visit the tourist attractions.

Why don't you and your son become tourists and explore Washington, D.C., for a few days? Ask your son to help you select places to visit, such as the National Mall, the Lincoln Memorial, the U.S. Capitol, the White House and the museums that interest you. You will have to schedule tours for some of these national treasures, but there's a good chance that you can get in before summer is over. Many tour companies sell bus-tour packages and other prearranged experiences. I looked online and found dozens of options.

Take a camera and a journal and make it an adventure!

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am 21 years old and have gone through hell and high water for my mother. We were homeless for nine years after she lost her big government job and, of course, her friends and family bailed on her. (Isn't that always the case?) Since then, I have always stuck by her and bailed her out of whatever nonsense she got herself into. I made sure she had everything she needed (food, clean clothes, a roof over her head, etc.), and I was basically her advocate at social services when they denied her help.

Her life is back to normal (she's now retired and disabled), but she is so used to me taking care of her now that she won't care for herself. I'm beyond frustrated, as you can probably tell, and I'm sick of playing Superman. -- Frustrated Daughter, Alexandria, Va.

DEAR FRUSTRATED DAUGHTER: Your mother needs to develop the skills to take care of herself, skills that she has not learned for a variety of reasons. Hopefully, she has insurance now. With that, you can get her involved in therapy where she can talk about her life and the challenges she faces. Set up the sessions for her and, if it is allowed, attend some of the sessions with her so the therapist can see exactly how your mother looks at the world.

Meanwhile, see if you can get into college or find a job where you will be out of the house and on your own, at least for some of the time. Tell your mother your schedule and explain to her that as much as you love her, you have to live your life.

Step by step, spend more time on your own. When you are with your mother, make it clear that you love her and that she has to be responsible for herself now. Check in on her to ensure that she is OK. The more consistent you can be in contacting her, the easier it will be for you to be apart from her, because she will not feel abandoned.

You need to do this now to establish any semblance of independence. But be prepared to take care of your mother again. The blessing and challenge of having older parents is that usually at some point, the adult children gain the privilege of caring for them into their old age. Unfortunately, you had to do it on the front end as well.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend blew off my graduation party, saying he couldn't get a ride. He said he didn't call me because he didn't want to upset me. I care so much for him. How can I get him to know that his strategy hurts? -- Broken-Hearted in Cincinnati

DEAR BROKEN-HEARTED: I'm not sure if your boyfriend is worthy of your devotion, but one way to find out is to tell him what you need. Tell him that you need him to call when he cannot come. Tell him that it hurts your feelings and worries you when he disappears. Ask him to respect you by communicating. If he can't do that, he doesn't deserve you.