DEAR HARRIETTE: I am the boss of a small company that employs five people. Since it is such a small business, each person's role is vital to make the company run efficiently. While one would think that this environment would motivate my staff to work hard, I think that our close relationships have caused them to become lazy.

I was walking through the office, and I noticed that a majority of the employees were on Facebook, Twitter or online shopping sites. A lot of the tasks I have assigned are handed in late or not up to the standard I expect.

This is not how I expect my employees to spend their time, but I don't know how to tell them this. I am afraid that they are taking advantage of me, and they think they can get away with anything. How do I tell them this is not the case? -- Cool Boss, Chicago

DEAR COOL BOSS: You have to re-establish your authority in your company and motivate your staff to work hard. Call a staff meeting, and talk about the state of your business. Do your best to paint a picture of the good news, whatever is working in the company. If you can highlight projects that staff members have completed successfully, do so. If possible, select something about each person so that they all shine.

Then, point out that you have noticed something about their behavior that is not supportive of success. Tell your staff that you have noticed that they are accessing social media and shopping online when they should be doing their jobs. Productivity is essential for a healthy workplace. Let them know that you need them to focus on their responsibilities while they are at work.

If necessary, bring in a tech person who can block access to social media sites. Before taking that measure, ask for their compliance, and keep watching to see how they respond.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend is extremely jealous and loves to show off. If I talk to another guy, he will get upset and threaten to break up with me. Yet when he talks to another girl, he purposely makes sure that I see him doing so, and then asks me if I am jealous. I am not a jealous person, so I tell him no. This makes him angry, and he threatens to break up with me. He says that I do not love him.

It seems obvious that I should break up with him, but there are some times when he is so sweet and loving that I completely forget about his jealous side. Any suggestions? -- Confused, Rochester, N.Y.

DEAR CONFUSED: Cut your losses before he becomes dangerous. Your boyfriend sounds like he has an unhealthy understanding of the way that relationships should work. You should be free to talk with whomever you want without fear of upsetting him. Chances are he will not change. You deserve to have a healthier, safer relationship. Leave him so that you have room to meet someone better suited to you.

DEAR HARRIETTE: This is a reply to "Need Some Clarity," the reader and her sister who were concerned about not being invited to parties since the their mother died. They are worried about not being invited to their grandmother's birthday party. I bet they never host parties, and, therefore, the cousins decided not to include them. I come from a big family, and my sisters and I always hosted the holidays, birthdays, etc. We, too, got fed up with the lazy freeloaders who showed up for everything but never took a turn in having everyone over.

If they are so worried about missing grandma's party, they should throw the party and invite everyone. I'm sure the cousins would be delighted to come and not have the work of having the party at their home. -- All About Responsibility, Chicago

DEAR ALL ABOUT RESPONSIBILITY: You raise an interesting point, especially from the perspective of a large family of folks who always do the hosting. It is conceivable that the hosts could tire of always being the party-throwers.

I wonder if your description of other family members as "lazy freeloaders" might be a bit harsh. While some people may just show up without bringing anything or helping to clean up, I bet many people who attend parties regularly rather than hosting them may feel ill-equipped to host -- maybe they don't have the big house, they don't know how to cook, they never learned how to host, they are shy, etc.

That said, I agree that if "Needs Some Clarity" or her sister offers to host something for Grandma, the other family members would, at the very least, wake up to their presence and think about them differently.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am concerned. My 21-year-old daughter, who still lives at home with my husband and me, has suddenly taken an interest in the latest craze, those "Fifty Shades" books. I understand that she is officially an adult, but she has been a sheltered child, and I'm fairly certain that she hasn't had any sexual experience. Plus, she hardly ever reads anything. I'm afraid that she will be damaged or afraid as a result of reading these books. I'm not quite sure how to handle it. What is your advice? -- Prudish Mom, Washington, D.C.

DEAR PRUDISH MOM: Use this situation as a teaching moment. For starters, read the books. Even if this is not your taste in literature, you need to know exactly what she is reading so that you can talk about it intelligently.

Admittedly, this could be an awkward conversation, but you can do it. Ask her what she thinks about the books. Ask her how the content makes her feel. Ask if she has had any such experiences. Count on your daughter blushing and not being forthcoming. Push carefully.

Tell her that you wouldn't have selected these books as recommended reading but that you want to support her reading and her life. Do your best to keep the lines of communication open. Talk to her about relationships and sexuality. Attempt to lead the discussion away from the books and toward a healthy conversation about her life, her desires and her needs.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have spent the last semester studying abroad, and I came home last week. My group of friends is really close, and we always make sure we hang out together. While I haven't kept in contact with my friends as much as I could have, I expected that they would call me to go out with them.

I have told them I am back home; however, they have not called to see if I want to go out with them since I have been back. I know they have been going out with each other -- I see their posts on Twitter and Facebook. I am very upset.

Should I ignore them, or should I confront them and ask them why they are not inviting me to go out with them? -- Friendless, Scarsdale, N.Y.

DEAR FRIENDLESS: I understand how sensitive you are feeling about your friends and their exclusion of you. However, I would like for you to look at your situation a little differently.

You mentioned that you reached out to them to say that you are home. You also admitted that you haven't stayed in touch the way that you would have hoped. Have you called them to get together? Rather than sulking about them not inviting you to their various activities, be proactive. Call them. Tell them how much you miss them, and ask if you can hang out with them soon. Extending your hand may be all that's needed.

If, however, they remain chilly, call them back and ask them why they don't want to hang out with you anymore. Tell them you miss them and really want to reconnect.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a good guy friend with whom I have been spending a lot of time lately. We have been friends for many years, and I know that he used to like me while I was dating someone else. I have been single for a while, and I have started to develop a crush on my friend.

I am unsure if he still has the same feelings for me, and I feel like the situation has flipped with me having a crush on him while he does not feel the same way. There have been many opportunities these last few days to tell him how I feel, but I am scared of rejection and the fact that this may ruin our friendship. -- Out on a Limb, Shreveport, La.

DEAR OUT ON A LIMB: Here's the thing: You can wait and wonder and never find out or step out on faith and tell your friend your feelings. Since you already know that he had feelings for you at one time, you know that he could have interest.

Tell him that you think you like him, and you wonder if he still has feelings for you. You can add that you most want to be his friend, but you figured that since you have noticed these feelings, you thought you would tell him to see if he shares them. Listen for his response.