DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a big procrastinator. Whenever I have work that I don't want to do, even something as simple as the laundry, I find an excuse to not do it at that moment. Needless to say, I always regret not doing it earlier (like when I have nothing to wear and no time to do laundry before I go out). I find that once I start, it's not even that bad -- but I just can't get myself to start!

Do you have any tips to help me stop procrastinating so much? -- Delays Expected

DEAR DELAYS EXPECTED: I'm a big believer in making lists. I recommend that you write down all of your tasks, putting the ones you like the least at the top of the list. Boldface them, if that will help you to notice them. Set deadlines for each job so that you pace yourself. Check off each task when it's completed.

Schedule weekly duties such as laundry on your calendar for a particular day and time, so that the task simply becomes something you do at the same time each week. Routine helps to groom discipline.

The other key thing is to change the way you approach your responsibilities. Rather than claiming that you are a procrastinator, tell yourself that you used to be that way, but as of right now, you are changing. You have decided to handle your business, one project at a time. Then do it. When you slip, don't beat yourself up. Just go ahead and complete your tasks.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am about to graduate from high school. Lots of my friends are having graduation parties. I know it is customary to bring gifts to graduation parties, but I feel kind of strange doing that because I am graduating, too. Also, I am on a limited budget, and it will be hard for me to buy gifts for all my friends' graduations.

I don't want to be rude, but is it OK to show up to these parties empty-handed as a student? -- Graduation Frustration

DEAR GRADUATION FRUSTRATION: You do not have to bring a gift to every student's graduation party. I recommend that you give special gifts to only your good friends. You can do something special for the others who have invited you to celebrate with them. For example, give a beautiful card with a handwritten note that shares a sincere sentiment and memory of your time together in school.

If you have a photo of your friends and you, put it in a frame with a note. That could be a lovely reminder of good times in high school that may find its way into your friend's dorm room as he or she begins the transition to college.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm a 20-year-old college student. I spend a lot of time with my friends, and they mean a lot to me. Honestly, they make going through school worthwhile. Now I have a situation that is making me uncomfortable.

A close friend who normally tells me everything is keeping a secret from me. He won't tell me, but he's told our other close friend. It hurts my feelings that he suddenly doesn't trust me with something. He told me not to ask our other friend, but I want to know what's going on. What should I do? -- Feeling Like an Outsider, Jackson, Miss.

DEAR OUTSIDER: You may not want to hear this, but I suggest you take your friend's advice. Stay out of this situation; don't butt in. I understand why you feel left out, but who knows what's going on? You don't, for sure, and it is not your business anyway.

You may really hate this, but what I strongly recommend is that instead of fixating on what's going on between your friends -- or, more accurately, with your one friend's life -- pay attention to your studies. You are in college to learn and to develop and hone the skills you need to become great at being you, while making a living at the same time. Distractions, including whatever is going on with your friends, can easily keep you from focusing on your goal.

Yes, you want to be a good person, which implies being a good friend. The challenge is to keep your priorities in order. Be a friend by letting your friends know that you care and that you want to be supportive. Be a good you by buckling down and doing your schoolwork to the best of your ability.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I've been talking to and seeing a guy for about a month. We've both made it clear that we don't want anything too sexual yet. I really appreciate that attitude, because it makes it easier for me to relax with him.

But the thing is, the second I did get relaxed with him, I got a scary invitation to spend the night in his apartment next week. Is it too soon? I'm 22 years old and on my own now, but I have never crossed that line. Is now the time? -- Virgin, Rye, N.Y.

DEAR VIRGIN: I commend you for your decision thus far to remain a virgin. If it is your intention to remain so, I caution you not to spend the night at any man's house, especially one who is your love interest. Putting yourself in such a compromising situation will have either frustrating or devastating results. Neither is worth it.

DEAR READERS: As a writer myself, I found many of your responses to a recent question about writer's block compelling enough to run some of your suggestions on how to push past this challenging moment. Here is your collective wisdom:

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have to take partial exception to your answer to "Writer's Block." While your ideas regarding improving skills are great ones, you left out entirely the idea of collaborating with a professional to get started. Someone with "a million and one ideas" may not have all the time required to work through the course of study you suggest prior to getting those ideas on the page.

I am a self-employed language services provider, and I happily work with people in WB's situation all the time, providing a range of services from copy editing to coaching/encouragement to full-on ghost writing. Immersion in language building via study is a great way to move forward, but it certainly can be augmented with actual production if a professional is involved. -- English Language Expert, Chicago

DEAR ENGLISH LANGUAGE EXPERT: That's a great point that I didn't consider. Indeed, a whole industry exists to support people who want to tell their stories but who aren't actually writers. Help is near for those who want a ghost writer or who simply need assistance in developing their writing skills.

DEAR HARRIETTE: If "Writer's Block" is hesitant about classes, I suggest finding a copy of "English 3200." It is self-paced, although as a high school freshman I had only the first semester to complete the book. -- By the Book, Shreveport, La.

DEAR BY THE BOOK: There are many books that can help new writers, including the one you recommend. There also are online options. I believe your voice adds inspiration, because it proves that even at your young age, fear can set in, but you don't have to succumb to it!

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a slightly different response to "Writer's Block," who was concerned about putting her "million and one" ideas on paper because of potential grammatical errors. The single best way to overcome a phobia of writing is to simply write. A trick that I use is to write or type as fast as possible, without reading what goes down on the screen or the page. Then I put the pages aside to cool -- no reading them until four or five days have passed.

If "Writer's Block" will try this for a few days, she will discover that the power of a million and one ideas trumps any grammatical errors every time. There is plenty of time for correcting and editing, and lots of tools to help once something is on the page. -- Just Do It, Salt Lake City

DEAR JUST DO IT: I love your idea. I often "just write" when I know there's something in me that needs to come out but I can't express it in the form I would like. A good editor can help with grammar. Everyone should learn grammar, in my book, but a great start is to write.