DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have been in a relationship with a woman for six months now. Things have been really great; we get along well, make each other laugh a lot and are mutually supportive.
The thing is, she goes on business trips once or twice a month that range from a couple of days to a full week. Don't get me wrong -- it's kind of nice because I get to do things I'm not normally allowed to, like go out for wings with the boys or sit on the couch in my underwear and watch the shows I want to.
But lately, I've started to wonder if the trips are really for business, like she says, or if they might be short getaways. She gets really excited leading up to these trips, and when she gets back, she always seems a little disappointed. That sounds a lot like vacation to me, and I am not OK with her taking vacations without me.
Am I overthinking this, or should I go ahead with my plan to give her an ultimatum about taking vacations without me?
GENTLE READER: There are many bright red flags here, not the least of which is what you and your lady friend do and do not "allow" one another to do.
The possibility that she is lying to get away from you twice a month, her being disappointed when she returns, the stability of her job if she is vacationing this much -- these also come to mind. As does your plan to give her an ultimatum.
Miss Manners suggests that you two share a talk in which, in a non-accusatory way, you ask if she would perhaps like to go on vacation with you, as she enjoys traveling so much.
Her answer will likely be telling, no matter what it is. And if her response is not satisfactory, at least you will once again be free to watch TV in your underwear.