DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a middle-aged woman and I live alone. Across the street from me lives a family with young children, whom I am quite friendly with.

During this pandemic, the kids have taken up baking as an activity to do at home. A few months ago, their mother began leaving trays of baked goods at my doorstep.

I was touched by the thought, but these items are, to be honest, not very good, seeing as they’re baked by young children. Plus, it’s an enormous amount of neon-colored icing and sprinkles! I thanked the kids and complimented them on their baking skills, as any friend would, but tossed the baked goods out.

My problem is that now the family brings me the kids’ creations in great volume, at least twice a week, with notes saying they are working hard to bake more for me since I like it so much!

Is there a kind way to gently refuse these gifts, or at least to cut down on their frequency? Or is the kindest thing to simply continue graciously accepting them and throwing them out?

They’re delightful neighbors and I am so grateful that the kids think of me.

GENTLE READER: Then let’s not insult them.

This can be accomplished, Miss Manners is confident, without submitting to a mountain of sprinkles and icing. It merely requires tact.

First, no hurtful truths. Neither the baking team of Jenna and Josh, nor their mother, needs to know that the cake batter didn’t fully set or that there was a button in the M&M topping.

Second, no accusations. We will not suggest that they are trying to kill you because you are diabetic or lactose-intolerant or neon-phobic.

Third, no extraneous information. What became of the last batch is irrelevant.

And finally, no lies -- at least, not ones that are likely to be exposed. We will not be confiding that your bridge group loved the cookies if your partner is the children’s third-grade teacher.

Call Jenna and Josh’s mother (we do not want the young bakers in on the conversation), thank her profusely, but explain that, grateful as you are, it is just more than you can possibly consume. And if you have neighbors of whom you are not overly fond, you could add that they might enjoy some treats.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Is it acceptable to mix up foods on your plate or in a bowl prior to eating them?

For example, if you have bananas, pudding and whipped cream in a bowl, must you mix each bite individually? Or is it acceptable to mix the bowl up and then take bites?

GENTLE READER: One of the functions of table manners is to help dinner partners ignore all the mixing, mashing and masticating going on in close proximity. Operations that can be carried out without drawing attention are likely acceptable.

But as Miss Manners realizes this is an imprecise directive, she suggests you avoid activities that may test its limits -- and learn to slice vertically through that bowl.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Degradation of the English language has become a prickly burr under my tail. While speaking with someone, if they say 6 times 5 equals 35, it is not considered impolite to correct them and say no, it’s 30. So why is it considered impolite to correct someone’s grammar?

GENTLE READER: Even in the halcyon days when we naively thought that facts were immutable and universal, there were problems with your premise. Miss Manners has no trouble imagining rude ways to correct a person’s multiplication.

As she is in the business of making the world more polite, not less, she will limit herself to one general example: delivering said correction in a way that belittles or embarrasses the recipient. It is to avoid such a result that etiquette has rules against correcting others. And of course, there are exceptions -- responding to a request, teaching, saving someone from a worse fate (like underpaying the dinner bill) -- many of which still require careful handling.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: We are throwing a small baby shower for my niece and would like to put a small note in the invitations requesting that everyone be aware and please make sure they have not been exposed to COVID-19. Any suggestions how to word this? Obviously in a polite way!

GENTLE READER: A small observation: Miss Manners sympathizes with your desire not to have your guests put your own, or one another’s, lives at risk. But this is not the way to accomplish it.

Guests who have been careful during the pandemic will be offended at the suggestion that they were not. Guests who have not been careful during the pandemic will be offended that you think they should have been. And no one will change their behavior.

Surely that guest list is small because it is limited to a very few people you know extremely well. Go over it again with your niece, and eliminate anyone about whom either of you has doubts. If this makes it impossible to assemble even a small party, surely that is valuable information.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I attended my daughter’s grade school program, an annual event that was completely reimagined in light of the COVID-era restrictions. I could tell that her teachers put in tremendous hours of preparation in order to make it a success.

After the program, I sent an email to her teachers expressing my gratitude and complimenting them on a job well done. I copied the principal and the headmaster of the school.

I did not receive an email in return. When someone takes the time to send you an email of praise and thanks, is it necessary to respond?

GENTLE READER: Ordinarily, thank-you letters do not require a response for the practical reason that even Miss Manners cannot spend all day writing thank-you letters for thank-you letters for thank-you letters.

She does, however, agree that it feels wrong not to have your spontaneous, unexpected -- and non-mandatory -- gratitude acknowledged. Note that this advice is only of practical use when you, yourself, are the recipient of such a letter. Being mad at the overworked teacher who did such a lovely job on your daughter’s program is unproductive.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I realize that delivery services send a notice when a package has been delivered. However, I also appreciate hearing from the recipient that the package successfully made it into their hands, undamaged and intact. The number of thefts from people’s porches has recently increased, so I don’t think it’s unreasonable to expect an acknowledgment that a package arrived safely.

When I didn’t receive an acknowledgment from my niece regarding a gift I sent to my 4-year-old great-niece, I sent a text, asking her if she got the package. I didn’t receive a reply for another week, and when I did, it was: “Yes, she loved it.”

That was the complete text. I don’t expect a follow-up thank-you note, but felt a little disappointed in her belated and curt reply.

I’m glad my great-niece loved it, but it almost felt like my niece was put out for having to reply. I know she is very busy, but it takes only a few seconds to add the words “Thank you!” And it takes the same amount of time to respond whether one waits a day or a week, so why keep the sender waiting and wondering if their gift was received? Am I expecting too much?

GENTLE READER: Some people are indeed expecting too much. Your niece evidently expects people to pay tribute to her and her daughter without their deigning to take notice.

You are expecting too little. Asking whether a present has been received long served as the polite way to complain that, rather, it is thanks that have not been received. As you point out, tracking and delivery notices have blown that cover.

But why are people -- it’s not just you -- ashamed to admit that they want to be thanked for their generosity?

The purpose of giving a present is to please the recipient. Why do gift-givers feel selfish if they want to know that it worked? The very company from which you bought it will probably pelt you with pleas to say whether you were pleased with the product and the service.

Miss Manners has always believed that people who do not acknowledge presents are annoyed at receiving them, and she respects that preference.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: How should an immediate family celebrate birthdays as spouses and grandchildren enter the picture?

We have a history of scheduling a celebration for every single birthday, moving it from the day-of to weekends or to whenever everyone can come. With parents, six adult kids, spouses and now grandchildren, this has become exhausting.

How does one gracefully change the tempo? And what (if anything) should it be changed to?

GENTLE READER: As these gatherings have presumably been suspended during the pandemic, you have an excellent chance to redesign them. The key is not to say that you are exhausted, but that you are afraid that others must be.

Some might protest, so Miss Manners suggests jumping in with the idea that you have monthly parties to celebrate all of that month’s birthdays.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)