DEAR MISS MANNERS: At social gatherings, I often take photos. I am an avid photographer, and spend time retouching to ensure dark photos are lightened and light photos are darkened so that the final image is better. I often restore old photos to a better quality -- removing dust, dirt, etc.

At a recent family event, I took many photos, which I brightened and enhanced to the best quality and posted on my social media account. My relatives have saved them to their phones and reposted the photos as their own, instead of sharing a link to mine.

This got under my skin so much. I know social media is a no-win situation, but I spend time to make the photos their best, and then someone else gets the credit. I thought of watermarking the pics, but I’m sure my relatives would think I’m being high-maintenance.

GENTLE READER: There is good news and there is bad news: Your relatives already think you are high-maintenance.

Why this is bad news, Miss Manners thinks you already know. Why it is also good news: because you have nothing to lose by imprinting a photo credit (“By Gary Gummidge”) onto the image. Such an insertion, unlike a watermark, does what you want -- it gives you the credit -- without the implication that it will be used later for legal purposes. But beware: Instead of stopping the spread of your photos, it may only encourage distant acquaintances to request more.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Several years ago, I had a small etiquette dilemma that I still wonder about occasionally. Since it’s the kind of thing that could happen again in some other form, I’m curious what Miss Manners would recommend.

While in college, I spent a school break with my roommate, Jenna, and her family. After dinner one evening, Jenna went to wash the dishes, and I joined her (there was no dishwasher).

As we were finishing up, Jenna’s mother picked up a dish from the drying rack and scolded Jenna for not washing it properly. Well, I was actually the one who’d washed the dish badly. (I’d been spoiled most of my life by dishwashers and, more recently, the college meal service.)

I didn’t say so, though, and neither did Jenna. Maybe I didn’t want to own up to my mistake, but I also thought it would embarrass Jenna’s mom to find out she’d accidentally scolded a guest.

Was I right to keep quiet and let Jenna take the fall for the poor dishwashing, or should I have admitted it was my fault?

GENTLE READER: You did the right thing in the moment, and Miss Manners agrees it was not an easy call. But she is sorry to say that you missed the extra credit: apologizing to Jenna privately later, and explaining why you did not come to her defense. This would have diffused any betrayal Jenna might have been feeling. But more importantly, it would have given her the satisfaction of then complaining to her mother that she embarrassed a guest -- which might have stung, when embarrassing her daughter evidently did not.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My parents started their family about 20 years after their siblings did, so our first cousins have several years on us.

At family gatherings as a young adult, I remember my cousins calling their aunts and uncles by their first names. My sister and I were expected to address our relatives using their titles, so for us to say “Mary, would you pass the salt?” rather than “Aunt Mary” never even crossed our minds.

My family could be very outspoken if they did not approve of something, and my elders never said anything about my cousins’ not using the titles. Still, I continued to address relatives by title through my 50s (I am now 60) and when reminiscing with my first and second cousins now.

Some of my second cousins have now stopped using the “aunt” and “uncle” titles. While it does bother me a bit in reference to my own parents, it didn’t bother them, so I shake it off as my being overly sensitive.

Does there come a point at which adult children are free to drop the titles when speaking to or about their aunts and uncles?

GENTLE READER: There came a point at which many aunts and uncles decided that being shown respect made them “feel old” -- as if they could otherwise disguise their ages -- and asked to have these titles dropped. Or parents who felt that way stopped teaching them.

Miss Manners finds those forms as charming as you do, and joins you in regretting that they are now infrequently used.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My daughter is planning, and paying for, a lovely but expensive wedding this fall. She would like to include a note in the information packet accompanying each invitation, whose wording we seek your help with.

She wants to indicate she and her fiance are staying up to date on social distancing recommendations, and would understand if people do not wish to attend the wedding for reasons of safety. But she also wants to state, in a polite but direct way, that the RSVP is essential to their planning so that they do not pay for guests who don’t show.

Have you any suggestions as to how she can word the note for maximum effect?

GENTLE READER: Here is how people interpret any attempt to say, “We’re inviting you, but you don’t have to come”: “They don’t really want me; they only want me to send a present.”

So forget that. It is up to your prospective guests to decide on their own whether to attend the wedding. They are certainly obligated to let you know their decisions, but as you and Miss Manners sadly know, many people rudely ignore invitations, sometimes even when they do actually intend to go.

Encouraging them to attend is, however, charming. In an informal letter, sent after the invitations, your daughter can note that she will be arranging social distancing and practicing other health precautions. That is the place to add a gentle nag to scofflaws: “We are hoping you will come, but haven’t yet heard.”

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My co-worker and I have been friends since she began working at our office several years ago. Our office has no windows, so, historically, when she would go outside for a cigarette break, she would invite me to stand with her and get out of the office for a few moments. (I do not smoke, so I stand upwind of her.) We have been very close and our friendship was very meaningful to me.

I was out sick for nearly a month with what was initially thought to be COVID (though I tested negative for it). That was probably the sickest I have ever been in my life. I was out of work for three weeks, trying to recover -- the longest I have ever been out of work due to sickness.

I have been back to work for over a month now, but since my return, this co-worker has been very cold and will not speak to me. She makes a point of asking someone else, within my hearing range, to walk outside with her for her smoke breaks. She goes out of her way to avoid me, and I have no idea why!

She had made vague mention of my illness, so I assured her I was much better, and that my antibody testing indicated I had not been infected with COVID.

She continues to be chilly and nearly rude most of the time. I have been as kind as possible and continue to speak nicely to her, and try to ignore the obvious slights at work.

How on earth do I handle this? I thought whatever she was upset about might blow over, but this behavior seems to be here to stay.

GENTLE READER: The prudent habit of social distancing should not be confused with an older, uglier propensity to shun the unfortunate, out of the feeling that misfortune of any kind could be contagious.

Your co-worker is practicing the latter. Were she seriously only afraid of contagion, she would be concerned about your health and anxious that you not interpret her distancing as callous.

As she has made no such moves, Miss Manners suggests that you cease imagining that this person is your friend and deal with her, to the extent necessary, in a formal and professional manner.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: When meeting a woman for the first time in social circumstances, is it appropriate to give a quick handshake, a crisp smile and say “Charmed”? Or is such a phrase no longer considered charming?

GENTLE READER: The smile is still necessary and the handshake is at least suspended until better days, when it may or may not be resumed. But as for saying “Charmed,” that was never right.

Miss Manners assures you that it is more flattering to declare a lady charming after you have begun to get to know her than to label her so automatically.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)