DEAR MISS MANNERS: A friend calls out to you in a parking lot. You wave hello, and keep going to your destination. Is it OK just to wave to a friend when you are in a hurry? Or do you have to stop and talk?

GENTLE READER: In our current situation, you could actually be fined for it. That excuse will not last forever, however.

When things return to normal, Miss Manners assures you that as long as you make it clear that it is your schedule, and not your affection, that is in question, it will still be acceptable to keep moving. This can be accomplished by accompanying the wave with a gesture to a (real or imagined) wristwatch and a hurried, but pleasant and apologetic, facial expression. If you are able to follow up later with a phone call or email, it may quell any fears that the friendship was not worth stopping for. Unless of course, that is the actual case.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I often send texts and emails that need an answer, but I get crickets. If I’ve made a request, I’m totally fine with hearing, “Sorry, I can’t do this,” but hearing nothing puts me in a quandary.

I’m pleasant and friendly in tone, so I don’t think I’m putting people off. What’s going on here? Is this the new norm? How can I address these nonresponders?

GENTLE READER: It is endlessly annoying that people seem to find the time to regularly text pictures of goldfish that look like humans, yet somehow are unable to answer direct questions like, “Are we still on for parachuting tomorrow?”

Electronic correspondents tend to be selective in how they define “busy.” Miss Manners suggests that you try calling instead. Although she holds out little hope that this will be any more effective, it does tend to convey more urgency. She further allows you, after a reasonable amount of waiting time, to send a follow-up message that says, “Since I have not heard from you, I assume that you are no longer available,” and make other plans.

Enough rounds of this should either reform your friends -- or demonstrate that they may not be worth the correspondence.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was married for more than 50 years and have been widowed for two. I wonder how to refer to certain things and people.

We lived in “our house” and raised “our children.” I still live in the same place, and of course have the same children. But is it now “my house” or still “our house”? Are they “my children” or “our children”? Or are both acceptable?

Just because he is gone does not mean he was not an important partner and part of my life.

GENTLE READER: There must be someone in your life who thinks otherwise, and is helpfully suggesting that you “move on.”

Miss Manners gives you her permission to ignore such pressure. Indeed, the children and house were joint efforts and you may refer to them as such. You may continue to wear your wedding ring if you wish, and use your formal name (i.e., Mrs. Guiseppe McCann), if that is what you were previously called.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I’ll be receiving my degree soon. Since I am in a competitive field, I am applying to a lot of jobs. Naturally, some jobs are less desirable than others. I don’t want to lose any job offers I may receive, but I don’t want to accept a position if a better one comes along.

What is the proper way to postpone accepting a job offer so that it still remains a viable option, while allowing time for other potential offers? How long can I reasonably expect an offer to stay on the table?

GENTLE READER: This is a question of business etiquette, which, at least in this case, means your behavior should be businesslike: efficient, practical and honest.

You can reasonably expect a few days’ grace -- more, if your would-be employer already knows that it will require complex considerations such as negotiating with a spouse or moving to another city. Just as with salary negotiations, you are free to ask for what you want or need -- and the employer is free to reject the request or make a counter-offer.

There is no harm in explicitly saying that you are weighing it against other offers. Miss Manners warns strongly against untruths or going back on your word, but she promises not to inquire if those other offers have actually been made.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was sitting in a government office’s waiting room and a child sneezed several times without covering her mouth. Her parents did not remind her to sneeze into a tissue or her sleeve.

I was frozen between not wanting to be rude by chastising strangers, and fearing that I might catch a disease, so I said nothing.

I cannot always avoid public places. With influenza, colds and now coronavirus menacing us, what polite thing can I say to remind people how not to spread their germs?

GENTLE READER: Recent events have reminded us all of the damage that can be inflicted by infectious diseases. One can usually protect oneself in the situation you describe by moving out of range.

But your question is: At what point do we all become public health officials, who are not only allowed, but required, to override the etiquette dictate against correcting other people’s behavior?

In the situation you describe, it is possible for you, as a private citizen, to satisfy the requirements of both safety and etiquette: Say “Poor dear” and tell the parents that you would be happy to give little Norah a tissue.

Someone will no doubt correct Miss Manners, that public health is not to be trifled with by pausing to consider something as trivial as manners. She reminds that reader that etiquette is never more important than in trying times. And demanding that the family remove the sneezing child seems to her to violate another thing health professionals are telling us: Panic makes things worse.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have an older sister who continues to go out to socialize. She posts photos of herself with friends on social media, despite the current need for everyone to stay home. These are not outings to get needed supplies, nor is she going to an essential job.

I tried to gently mention how we should not be going out at all if it can be helped, and she insisted it was only to see a few people, so she was fine. I am worried not only for her own safety, as she is of mature years, but also for that of her 13-year-old daughter (who has a history of pneumonia), her friends who are seniors, and society at large.

She lives where there is a large population of senior citizens, and also where there have been less stringent preventative orders than elsewhere. How does one press such a dire subject for everyone’s safety to someone who isn’t taking the situation seriously?

GENTLE READER: Etiquette cannot substitute for responsible public officials in setting health policy during a pandemic.

Miss Manners does not say this to invalidate your all-too-familiar problem, but rather to acknowledge the heartbreaking results when we are forced to use the wrong tool for the job.

What she can suggest is treating the situation as you would an irresponsible health choice made by a close relative. Your sister is endangering herself, your niece and her friends: This is worth saying to her, even if you are unable to convince her.

When normalcy returns, we will just have to remember that such strong solutions are reserved for dire and imminent threats -- they are not a license to harangue passing strangers about their bad habits.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: When a friend’s daughter got married, I enjoyed seeing her photos on social media, and was very happy for her. I sent her (the daughter) a message and told her I would love to send her a gift if she could send me her address.

I was a bit stunned when she responded and said thank you, but that she didn’t want a gift. I am on a very fixed income, so sending her a present is not a simple matter for me financially, yet I had really wanted to do it to bless her in this happy period of her life.

I felt very slighted by her refusal. (At least I hadn’t purchased a gift yet.) Am I wrong for feeling a bit rejected when she said no gifts were necessary?

GENTLE READER: So frequently does Miss Manners hear from Gentle Readers about their frustrations at constant demands for gifts from friends, relatives and co-workers that she admits to surprise at your question.

Remember that your desire is to express your congratulations and good wishes in a meaningful and memorable way. Your message may already have done this, but if not, a longer, handwritten letter will surely do so.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)