DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a very private person and have had issues with stalkers in the past. I am not on any social media, nor do I want to be.

So when the usual, casual, get-to-know-you questions are asked in a social setting, I lie or tell half-truths about where I live and work. And I give my nickname instead of my legal name, or any other identifiable information.

I think it is much better to just make up this info than to say, “I’m not going to tell you.” I have zero intention of explaining my painful past, and anyway, why does some random person need to know?!

My sister thinks this is a terrible idea and thinks I should just politely tell them I don’t want to give out that information. What do you think is the best way to answer these types of social questions?

GENTLE READER: First, let us clarify your own question. You seem to be asking how to behave at getting-to-know-you gatherings when you don’t want anyone to get to know you. In that case, why attend?

It is not that Miss Manners believes that you are required to give your address to strangers. Even without your unfortunate experience, that seems unwise. It is also unnecessary.

But you have to give them something with which to start a conversation. And the none-of-your-business dismissal your sister suggests is not going to do it. Nor should you be lying.

But for that matter, bare facts, even if you were willing to provide them, would not serve the purpose, either.

You should use those questions to provide information you don’t mind sharing: “I live in town, but I have a tiny patch of land because I love to garden. Do you?” Or “Oh, I just work to support my tennis habit. Do you play?”

DEAR MISS MANNERS: We frequently have my sister-in-law’s family over for family dinners. She and her husband have always allowed their 12-year-old son to choose not to eat any vegetables, and almost no fruit. He refuses to eat them because “he doesn’t like them.” This has gone on his entire life.

At Thanksgiving dinner, he will eat a small amount of turkey and probably several rolls. Dessert is always allowed, which he eats in full. This is bothersome not only to my wife and me, but to her other sisters and extended family members, also.

When they are at our house as our guests, are we on any valid ground to insist the kid eat a couple of green beans or carrots and some potatoes?

GENTLE READER: No. In fact, double no, because you should not attempt to train other people’s children unless specifically authorized to do so, and you should not be monitoring what any of your guests eat.

You will, of course, protest that the child is a relative and that you are concerned for his health. That is a topic that can be raised only by a relative who is on confidential terms with the parents and can do so without criticism of their child-rearing -- and far away from the dinner table.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: A friend of mine asked me to join her and another friend in starting a podcast. This was about 10 months ago. I did join, somewhat reluctantly.

I told them in the beginning that I did not like discussing my private life on a global platform. Eventually, I started becoming irritated with my friend, which led to my leaving the podcast abruptly, via text.

She was upset with me and I think we are no longer friends. I did apologize, via text, that I was sorry for the way I handled the situation. To be frank, I think I should not have started the podcast in the first place.

But anyway, if I come across this friend in social circles -- we have some friends in common, who occasionally go out to dinner together -- what should I do? Should I approach her and smile, as if nothing happened? Should I cower in the corner, afraid she will throw a drink in my face? Should I pull her aside and say “Look, I just want to make sure we are OK”? Should I wait for her to make the first move?

And what do I tell our mutual friends? I am worried they will choose sides, as people often do in situations like this. Should I try to get them to see my side, or just not bring it up?

GENTLE READER: Public feuds are not much fun, so Miss Manners would advise you not to start one. Especially as you are the one who abruptly walked out, and thus unlikely to inspire sympathy. Apologizing by text is minimal for leaving someone in the lurch.

So not only should you avoid starting a scene, but you should be careful not to provoke one from your former friend. The demeanor to follow is Proceed With Caution. Greet her pleasantly, but be prepared to back away if she is cold to you.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am attending a bridal shower for which the bride is registered online. The request is to directly ship gifts to the couple, as they are intending to move, and would like to pick the shipping date of the gifts.

Because I am sending the gift to their home, what do I bring to the shower? A card? A gadget for their kitchen or tool kit? Nothing? Is it appropriate to walk in empty-handed? That seems a little weird.

GENTLE READER: If people are going to insist on taking all of the spontaneity out of present-giving not only by dictating the merchandise, but also by setting its timeline and means of delivery, Miss Manners can hardly muster sympathy for them when their guests obey their rules and show up empty-handed.

Miss Manners realizes that this couple is probably not deserving of her wrath -- and that they are merely being practical. But since “practical” is what has led others like them to register for everything from mortgages to funeral plots, she is rapidly running out of patience.

A card with a heartfelt note would be lovely. (But do not be insulted if you witness them shaking it down to see if there is a check inside.)

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I found myself in an awkward situation on a business trip with a colleague whose mobility is impaired due to bad knees. Our hotel was just a block from our workspace, so we did not have a car.

Midweek, we met up with some other colleagues for dinner at a restaurant about a half-mile away, which is quite easily walkable for me, but not my colleague. She asked if we could split a cab, and I said yes, suggesting she get the fare on the way to the restaurant and I get it on the way back.

However, had it been just me, I would have walked both ways and saved the money. How could I have told her politely that I would have preferred to walk and that perhaps she should get the fare both ways?

GENTLE READER: By telling her from the beginning that you preferred to walk, before any unseemly talk of payment became relevant. But Miss Manners would have taken the cab, just to avoid calling attention to your colleague’s problem.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: An artist that I met once long ago and bought a painting from contacted me through social media. He said that he wanted to send me some small items, as he was thinking of me, and asked for my address. Although I didn’t want anything from him and tried to gently dissuade him, he was adamant, so I did send my address.

When I received the package he sent, it contained some tea that his community makes, along with a thick stack of postcards of his work -- and a note asking me to sell the postcards in order for him to make money to print more postcards.

Although the postcards of his work are very nice, I have no way or desire to sell them for him, nor do I really want them for myself. Could you please suggest what I do with them? I am at a loss.

What seemed at first to be a gift is now a burden of time and finance. Do I return the postcards and the tea? Send him $20 and wash my hands of everything? Do I write him a polite note and tell him I have no way to sell anything for him, and ask what he’d like me to do with everything?

I don’t wish to hurt his feelings or burn a bridge, but this “gift” seems onerous. Help! What is the most polite way out of this situation?

GENTLE READER: Express thanks for the tea and leave it at that.

You owe this person nothing, Miss Manners assures you, except the money that you have already paid for his painting. These postcards were sent under false pretenses and are therefore not your problem.

When thanking him for the tea, you may add: “If anyone asks me about where I got the painting, I will give them one of your postcards to contact you. But I am afraid I am not in the business of brokering talent.”

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)