DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a 13-year-old boy, and I’m bisexual. I don’t know how to tell my parents, although I think they might think that I’m gay (because of how I act and my obsession with nail polish). But I’m still very nervous to tell them.

I feel like if I do come out, they would accept it, but the topic is very awkward when I’m talking about it with my siblings. I already told my friends, but how should I tell my parents, family members and my parents’ friends?

GENTLE READER: Many a child has learned the effectiveness of scaring parents into thinking their impending news is going to be much more drastic than it is: “I’m pregnant! Just kidding, I failed biology.”

While there might be a temptation to oversell in the name of lessening the impact, Miss Manners cautions you against such theatrics. Tell your family members privately and simply, without apology or forecasting a negative response. Politely and patiently answer their questions and correct misconceptions, doing your best not to betray any annoyance.

And if all else fails? Skywriting.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I work as a property manager and I speak on the phone with dozens of people every day: tenants, prospective tenants, vendors and other employees of the company I work for.

It has been bothering me lately when people I am on the phone with will not hang up without a proper valediction. Before hanging up, some will just say “OK” or “thanks.”

Our regional accountant does that to me, and I feel it is rude. Sometimes prospects who called to ask questions about the property will just hang up when I am in the middle of talking.

The last time this happened, someone asked me how much the apartment rates were. I assume they hung up because the rates was too pricey for them, but I would have thought the polite way to respond would have been “Oh, that’s over my budget, but thank you for the information” followed by a “goodbye.”

I’ve been getting so fed up with this behavior from multiple people lately that I’ve considered calling back the people who hang up on me to say something along the lines of, “I’m so sorry, I think something happened to the phones, as I was talking and suddenly the phone line cut off.”

Is this just the new norm to end phone conversations, and I’m just being petty? Or do I have a real reason to be miffed?

GENTLE READER: You are justified in your miff-dom, and Miss Manners finds your proposed solution to be a polite and likely effective one. But it is also within the parameters of your job to talk to co-workers directly about their rudeness, particularly if they represent the company. “Isn’t it awful how customers just abruptly hang up on us? We should lead by example on this, and not do the same” would give them the benefit of the doubt, without placing any direct blame.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Unexpectedly, in a rushed public place, I met my son’s girlfriend’s mother for the first time. During the introductions and short conversation, the mother complimented our son, saying she liked him very much and thought he was a nice boy.

When I did not reply with a compliment about her daughter, the woman said, “At this point, you should say something nice about my daughter.”

I indicated that I thought her daughter was very nice and we thought a lot of her. I then made my way out of the conversation, because we were in a bit of a rush and I was a bit put off.

My son came to our house and perpetuated the situation, telling me they thought I was rude not to have immediately reciprocated but had to be asked to do so. Should I apologize to his girlfriend, whom we really do like, or leave it alone? I don’t want to cause any hurt feelings.

GENTLE READER: Like dirty dishes, etiquette infractions become less appealing, and more work to clean up, as time goes by.

Miss Manners understands from your description that your failure to reciprocate was not a lack of goodwill toward the daughter -- or even a disagreement that returning the compliment was the right thing to do -- but rather a side effect of your being surprised by the meeting and distracted by the time.

Irrespective of whether the mother’s comment was meant to be humorous or rude, it provided you with an easy way to repair the damage: Compliment her daughter emphatically -- so emphatically that no one could miss your surprise at the merest suggestion that you are not enamored of her.

This is a good reflex to develop, particularly for people who find they do not always say the right thing instinctively. Not having done that, a bit more soap will be required. Explain to the girlfriend what happened, apologize profusely, and tell her how much you like her. She will report this back to her mother, and since it was the daughter who, in theory, was insulted, the mother will have no further justification for being upset. And if the mother does a hold a grudge, at least you will have the daughter on your side.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: A neighbor who is a dear, helpful man helps cut down trees and even occasionally cuts the lawn, but ... he has the habit of coming over during dinner. We offer him food, but he does not want to eat with us.

Is it rude to continue eating in front of him, or do we let the food get cold and reheat it after he has left? He just comes to chat, but at an inconvenient time.

GENTLE READER: Explain that you were just eating dinner, invite him in, and ask him to sit down with you at an empty place at the table.

Miss Manners is not suggesting force-feeding your inconvenient guest, only maneuvering him into a position in which you and your family will be free to continue eating while the food is hot. If he refuses to sit down, say how sorry you are that he is unable to stay and how much you look forward to seeing him again.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Is it rude to leave food getting cold when someone cooks for you?

This is a point of contention between my boyfriend and me. It irritates me to no end when I take the time to make a meal for him, and he lets it sit there getting cold while he does stupid things.

GENTLE READER: Letting one’s food get cold is not, in itself, an etiquette violation. The “stupid things” may be.

Examples include leaving the table during a meal without a good excuse, answering emails instead of engaging in conversation, and arranging stick-figure scenes with your green beans.

Miss Manners notes that the reward for changing those behaviors will be lively conversation that will bring you closer together. Assuming the conversation was not the stupid thing.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: After a death in my family, I appreciated that friends of mine attended the funeral. But I was surprised when one friend questioned me -- twice -- on whether a lunch would be provided.

I told her beforehand, and again the day of, that it would not be, but that she could stop by the family house for a snack and a chat if she’d like.

She seemed to find it rude that we had not arranged for the entire group to have lunch together. I did not return any argument. I just reissued the offer to stop at my house. I was raised that people brought food for the bereaved because they were too upset to cook, and that the food was for the family and out-of-towners, not a catered buffet.

Fast-forward two weeks. The same friend had a parent die. She went out of her way to tell me that she was welcoming everyone to a local restaurant. I thanked her, but said I couldn’t come that afternoon. I would see her at calling hours and the funeral.

I went to calling hours and to the funeral, got flowers, and sent a small deli assortment to her house. She was not satisfied that I didn’t come to the buffet. Again, I didn’t return arguments, just said I was sorry that I had other plans (like still mourning my own relative).

Did I behave as poorly, as she seems to think? I didn’t in any way criticize her mourning ritual, and I tried to be thoughtful, but I didn’t go to the luncheon. Is a luncheon for all of the guests at the funeral (even in-town folks) now assumed to be a regular function that mourners should assume? If that’s the case, I’ll save up and make myself do it the next time.

GENTLE READER: Multiple and complex cultural customs -- as well as an unseemly societal haste to get funerals over with so people can proceed to something more fun -- confound expectations surrounding internment. The tradition you describe is that associated with the home visit.

Miss Manners makes allowances for different forms of observance. She would expect friends to do no less -- and scrupulously to observe the normal ban on correcting another person’s manners -- at such a time.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)