DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have a business providing pet grooming services. While tips are not ever required, I would like to make clients aware that tipping is allowed and very much appreciated.

I would like to put something in an advertisement about tipping, but I do not want to come off as rude or make it seem as though I expect the clients to do so. I have thought about using a tip jar; however, there are several businesses sharing the same space, and I don’t want any of the other clients to think that the tips are for all of the employees.

What is the best way to approach tip awareness without being rude or seeming entitled to them?

GENTLE READER: By not doing it at all. You have just demonstrated why Miss Manners has always abhorred the practice of tipping. Asking patrons to make a subjective decision about the service they have received (haven’t internet reviews replaced that?) by putting it in monetary terms is unpleasant -- and the demand for it, rude.

You simply cannot make an explicit request for money -- especially while dictating its particulars -- and then act as if it is the customer’s choice to do it.

However, Miss Manners concedes its necessity, as long as business owners are unwilling or unable to pay a living wage. But in this case, you are the business owner. You are in a unique position to eliminate the unpleasant and confusing practice by adjusting the price of the service instead. Please do so and set a good example for the rest of the retail world.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have a name that people like to make jokes about. No matter how clever or original a person might think their comment is, I have heard it many times before! Even after someone meets me for the first time, they might continue to make the jokes whenever we see each other. What is the best way to tell someone that I hear this all the time, and I would like for them to stop?

GENTLE READER: “Yes, people keep saying that. What are some of the names that you get called that you find hilarious?”

DEAR MISS MANNERS: From time to time in conversations at social gatherings with people I’ve just met, someone will mispronounce a common word. While I overlook this whenever possible, it is often necessary for me to repeat the word as the conversation progresses.

If I mispronounce it in the same way, I risk others thinking I, too, am ignorant of the proper pronunciation. If I pronounce it correctly, I worry that I might come across as attempting to correct the other party, or even worse, embarrass/offend them. What is the proper way to handle this situation?

GENTLE READER: If you are required to reiterate the mispronounced word, do so correctly. This gives the person who got it wrong the pleasure of thinking that you have erred. But Miss Manners cautions you to avoid emphasizing it more than the other words -- or making any pointed or undue eye contact with its mangler.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: If a wedding is at 5:30 p.m. at a resort destination, and the invitation states “Black tie invited,” is a sport coat and tie or a dark suit acceptable?

GENTLE READER: To whom?

The wording of the invitation suggests that Miss Manners and you are not the only ones who are confused about the dress code. Having itself been invited, does the formal attire need to respond to the host separately about whether it will be attending? And can the black tie wear a guest of its own choosing?

You yourself may wear a dark suit (though not a sport coat), on the assumption that the host intended to say that black tie was not required.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband and I live across country from where we grew up, so we often receive our special occasion gifts from folks back home in the mail. When it comes to our immediate family and loved ones of our own generation (older millennial), we’ll typically respond immediately with a thank-you call, text or Facebook message. For everyone else, though, we send a handwritten thank-you note, which we drop in the mail within a couple of days (though it can take a week to arrive).

Several times, however, we’ve had anxious relatives contact us during the lag before the snail-mail note has arrived to check whether we’ve received the gift. This leaves us feeling like we have been negligent for not using a more rapid means of communication, and then we’re always unsure how or whether to express that our note is already en route. (Selfishly, we want to make sure the relatives don’t just think that we rushed the thank-you note off after they reached out to us, even though I don’t think we’d have necessarily been in the wrong if we’d waited a week to send the note.)

My guess is that this is more a matter of older relatives being uneasy about online purchases than it is about etiquette, but it is still leading to a lot of confusion.

Should we be erring on the side of sending both a quick confirmation and a more formal note? If so, how much should we be writing in our initial text or email? We don’t want to say so much that a real note seems redundant, but also don’t want to even temporarily give the impression that we’re only going to be sending a quick, informal message.

GENTLE READER: Dearly as she loves a good thank-you letter, Miss Manners does not require that you send two for the same present. Write your thanks as you have until now. If a relative asks whether the present arrived, say it did, expressing enthusiasm and gratitude. Then ask if they have received your letter of thanks yet, voicing concern about the mail service, as you sent it some time ago.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: What should one do when people meet-and-greet at the buffet table, becoming absorbed in conversation with each other and standing there, keeping others from getting at the food? I’ve even seen them stand around and graze off the buffet while they gab, oblivious to the starving multitudes who can’t get past them.

Short of carrying a sandwich in my pocket, how is this impasse to be handled? It’s usually obvious that the host intended that people would fill plates and take them to another room to eat, but a lot of people don’t seem to get that.

GENTLE READER: In the days before e-commerce, electronic supermarket checkout and online vehicle registration, standing in line was a daily activity. While this was not an enjoyable reality, it did mean that people maintained a sense of proportion about what constituted a national crisis rather than merely an inconvenience. The behavior you describe is inconsiderate. But it can be addressed with two words: “Excuse me.” Miss Manners is confident that will be sufficient to avoid mass extinction due to starvation.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Is it a breach of politeness to write “handwritten” cards on my phone?

There’s this mobile app that allows me to use my finger or a stylus to write a personal note, attach some photos, and then the card is printed out and sent from some printing shop. No one who’s received them has complained, and I’m saved the trouble of buying cards and a trip to the post office, but I’m wondering if there’s something I’m missing out on.

GENTLE READER: No doubt some entrepreneur somewhere is working on a site that will allow you to “pen” love letters without the trouble of knowing anything about the object of your affections, after which they will be printed on heavy stock at a remote location, dipped in a user-selected perfume, and airlifted to the recipient’s front door. Unless you are adept at calligraphy, what makes a handwritten note special is not the penmanship, but the appearance of effort. If your app can simulate that convincingly, Miss Manners makes no objection, although what you describe sounds more like the preprinted cards one finds in the pharmacy next to the balloons.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I asked my girlfriend to marry me. She accepted. After a year and a half, she called it quits. She gave the ring back.

Would it be proper to give this same ring to someone else when the time comes, and do I tell that someone about this?

GENTLE READER: Unless you can truthfully claim that the ring is a family heirloom, there is no good way to explain what you intend to the new love of your life. And Miss Manners cautions you that not explaining it may prove embarrassing if someone who has seen the ring before recognizes it.

If you are intent on keeping the ring, the best you can hope for is that your wife has a sense of humor, and likes the ring enough to accept it as something other than a token of engagement.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)