DEAR MISS MANNERS: What is the proper etiquette for an individual on the receiving end of a standing ovation?

The case in point was not a performance, but rather a time of recognition for an individual at a board meeting of about 30 people. All participants were seated, while the individual was recognized for lengthy service to the organization. At the end of the spoken recognition, the individual was given a standing ovation.

The recipient of the ovation remained seated while all others present stood and applauded, then, while still seated, thanked the group, at which point the rest of the group sat down.

Should the recipient have stood at some point to acknowledge the ovation, or was it proper to remain seated until the ovation ended and the rest of the group took their seats?

GENTLE READER: The recipient's job is to look bashfully pleased. This can be done from a sitting position, by first raising the head to show a huge smile, and then dropping it to the chin to show humility. (Note: Miss Manners does not advise declaring that one has been humbled by all that honor. Everyone does say that, but no one seems capable of doing so without a smirk.)

Standing up and spreading one's arms while murmuring "Thank you, thank you" can be charming, but it requires some drama to bring it off without looking as if one has won the Triple Crown. For the truly bashful, remaining seated may be the wiser choice.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband and I were invited to a neighbor's son's graduation party. These folks have hosted numerous wonderful and generous get-togethers this past year, so I assumed when I RSVP'd saying that we would be attending, that this might be another occasion where each neighbor contributed some food or beverage item. I inquired what I might bring.

The response took me completely off guard, and I was, and am, at a loss for how to politely respond. I was told, "Oh, you needn't bring a dessert. This is a graduation gift shower. As long as you show up with a gift, that will be sufficient."

I am torn. Had I not just said we would be coming, I'd likely have found a graceful way to decline such an offer, but had already given my word. I also think I likely would have spent a comparable amount on a food item to contribute had that been expressed as the desire of the hostess. But somehow, being left with a "gimme" has left me not wanting to give.

I assume I need to go because I already RSVP'd that I would. Is it appropriate to show up without a gift and say something like, "Oh, I assumed you were joking!" when asked for it? Or should I just bite my tongue and obediently show up with said gift but make a note to be more cautious in the future?

GENTLE READER: This is clearly a pay-to-enter occasion. Evidently, your neighbors believe that all their parties are. They apparently counted those dishes, which you thought of as neighborly contributions, as being the price of admission, which they are now waiving as long as you contribute to their son.

Miss Manners agrees that having accepted the invitation, you are stuck. But the next time you invite them and they ask what to bring, say, "No, no, we don't accept contributions; just come."

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I will be in a conversation with a friend, just the two of us, and she will pick up her tablet computer to search the Internet for some detail related to something one of us just said.

Then she will notice a link to something else of interest, and she never again fully rejoins the conversation. She continues to look at the computer and browse, while also continuing to approximate conversation or sometimes just narrating what she is viewing.

She is an adult, and, as Miss Manners rightly says, one must not attempt to teach manners to anyone but one's own children. Or at least, one must not appear to do so. So how do I gracefully say, "Stop that, or I am leaving"? I don't want to just leave without first giving her a chance to modify her behavior.

GENTLE READER: Ah, yes, a common hazard, unknown to Miss Manners' predecessors.

The seductive part is that disputed or forgotten facts that surface in conversation can now be checked on the spot. This is a decidedly mixed blessing.

The person who was right gets to triumph immediately, rather than resorting to the dismal choice between letting it go and reviving a dead dispute. Yet instant research has a discouraging effect on conversation and an encouraging one on pedants.

Your friend has compounded the problem by veering off into the unfortunately common rudeness of snubbing an actual person in favor of playing with her own toy. You can find something else to do, if you say, "Well, I won't disturb you. We'll talk when you have finished your research." It might even be best to leave before she says, "Oh, I can do both."

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My nephew and his wife recently had a baby boy. A baby shower was given to them a few months prior to the birth of their son. Their requested gifts were, I deemed, a little bit extravagant, and about 90 percent of the guests just gave them clothes and other minor items.

Since the birth of the baby, my nephew has been posting pictures on Facebook. He recently added an application for people to give him gifts. When I click on the application, no suggestions are given for gifts for the baby; instead, the suggestions are for gifts for my nephew.

I feel my nephew is taking advantage of friends' and family's potential generosity, as he seems to take any and every opportunity to request gifts. Am I out of touch with today's social norms regarding gift-giving, or is it now completely acceptable to ask friends and family to even pay for a wedding (which he did, much to my shock!)? Please advise.

GENTLE READER: Taking advantage? Your nephew is a panhandler.

Miss Manners is sorry to have to tell you this, but the chief difference between begging on the Internet and begging on the street is that street beggars can't afford computers and actually need assistance.

Her advice is to treat these solicitations as you would any other spurious appeal and find worthier objects for your charity.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: We have a growing stack of invitations to the high school graduation parties of our friends' children. As we have children of this age, we are well aware of the practice that has taken over in recent years of nearly every family hosting a graduation party for their child during the early weeks of summer.

The result: dozens of parties per day, at times, for the graduating class of this one school (families at all schools in our area have the same practice), with party-time slots filled many times over.

I have heard many of the students and their parents speak about the amount of money "raised" at these parties, and it seems to be the main driver in having a party, which I find extremely distasteful. It has become an exchange of a hotdog for a check.

None of our children had high school graduation parties for this reason -- I don't want to invite people to my home and have one hand extended with the expectation of receiving a check in exchange for our hospitality. My daughters' friends are telling her she's crazy not to have a party, as she'll miss out on all the cash.

Please note that nearly all of the students are going on to college, so this isn't the only achievement expected in their lives.

While I'm all for congratulating the students, I don't know how to handle the "gift" situation. We are of limited means and are already scrambling to help our kids with college tuition.

I'm sure you'll say to decline the invitations if we don't want to write dozens of checks, but I feel as if we'll be slighting some of our closer friends who expect us to come to their parties. Any advice on how to handle what we see as a money-grab by our somewhat misguided friends?

GENTLE READER: Yes, but it requires you to do two things you wanted to avoid: skipping others' parties and giving one of your own.

The difference will be that your party will not be for your daughter alone, but explicitly for the senior class -- the entire class, if that is a reasonable number, or at least for those members who are friends of your daughter's or children of your friends.

That would be such a show of goodwill that your declining others' invitations will not be held against you. Besides, your friends will be too busy worrying whether presents for everyone are expected (and if asked, you can reassure them that no, this party is just for fun).

Mindful of your plea of limited means, Miss Manners excuses you from inviting the parents, on the grounds of not subjecting them to a teenage party, which is the nice way of saying that the teenagers will have more fun without them. That means that you won't be serving liquor and sophisticated food. It should be a lot cheaper than those checks you might have written.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Are great-aunts and great-uncles supposed to respond to high school graduation announcements?

GENTLE READER: Everybody who receives a graduation (or wedding or birth) announcement should respond with congratulations and good wishes. Miss Manners hopes you are not mistaking announcements for bills.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)