Pete walked into his boss’s office. “Ms. Smith, I’ll be straight with you. I know the economy isn’t great, but I have three companies after me, and I would like to respectfully ask for a raise.”

After a few minutes of haggling, Ms. Smith finally agreed to a 5 percent boost. When Pete got up to leave, she asked him, “By the way, which three companies are after you?”

“The electric company, the mortgage company and the phone company.”

We all have bills to pay. Our jobs are a good way to accomplish that. But if you feel like you aren’t receiving what you deserve, you have to muster up your courage and ask for a raise. That is a conversation you need to have with your supervisor, not your co-workers. They don’t make those decisions, and you will get a reputation for being the complainer.

Instead, prove you can perform the duties of your position and work your tail off making sure you’re the best hire your boss ever made. Then it’s time to ask for a raise. Here are some tips that will give you at least a fighting chance:

-- Pick your time carefully. When you asked your mom or dad for the car keys, did you hit them up when they walked in the door or wait until after they had dinner and were in a good mood? Timing is everything.

-- Be prepared. Almost everyone has an annual salary and/or performance review. But it’s amazing how few people prepare for it. Get your act together and present your case in an intelligent, well-organized manner.

-- Keep records. Keep a log of your accomplishments. Make notes in your daily calendar. That way, you won't forget anything, and you'll have the most reliable form of proof there is: written evidence.

-- Know the territory. One of the typical defenses against wage demands is, “You certainly deserve it, but we had a difficult year.” Is this true? If you work for a public company, check out the annual report. What are people at other companies getting paid for your job?

-- Ask for a specific number. This is the hardest one of all, because people are uncomfortable selling themselves. Put a number on the table, and make it realistic. Document overtime or special circumstances as evidence.

-- Don't threaten. Don't bluff. Don't be afraid to ask.

What happens if asking for a raise doesn’t work? Your short-term tactics may have failed, but your long-term strategy could still succeed. First, ask what it would take to get that raise next time. Other things that can help include:

1. Working longer hours, not shorter. Hours in new areas. Hours that give you more responsibility and greater challenges.

2. Training. You want the opportunity to improve your skills and learn new ones. Ask about the chance to attend a seminar or convention, or take some classes.

3. Hitting the mark. You want to know what requirements you must meet to hit your salary goals. Then ask for another salary review ahead of the normal schedule to chart your progress.

4. Career planning. Are your career goals realistic? Ask. Then also ask your boss for a long-term career path for you and a reasonable timetable for achieving it.

5. Making the move. Will management give you strong support in helping place you in another department where your salary requirements and career goals can be met?

The idea here is to get you ahead of the pack, away from the normal processes that the company follows to evaluate salaries. You want to be in the fast-track category. You’ve designed your own program.

Robert Herjavec from ABC's “Shark Tank” said: “You should never come out and say I deserve more money. Nobody cares what you deserve. It's about what you can do for the company. It's never I, I, I ... it's always what value you can add. Don't use the word I.”

Barbara Corcoran, also from “Shark Tank,” advises: “You've got to remember that asking for a raise is a sales job. It's how well-prepared you are, how you list your responsibilities. You should even have a category called ‘above and beyond’ on responsibilities and make sure the boss knows every little thing you're doing above and beyond. You know what -- you've got to sell! It's about selling.”

Mackay's Moral: If you want them to show you the money, you better show them the reason.

Baseball great Babe Ruth struck out 1,330 times over the 22 seasons he played.

“Every strike brings me closer to the next home run,” the Babe said.

And during those 22 seasons, he hit 714 home runs, a record that stood from 1935 until 1974, when Hank Aaron hit his 715th.

Babe Ruth’s attitude could have been defeatist instead -- after all, his mistakes were made in a most public way in front of fans who wanted nothing more than to watch him hit another homer. Instead, he went back to the dugout, refusing to lick his wounds, and prepared for his next at-bat.

That is what I call resilience.

Nearly all the successful people I know have dealt with defeat, slumps, failures, change and adversities of every nature. The reason they are successful in spite of all that is they had the confidence and courage to face those setbacks and find a way to overcome them. For some, it was pure stubbornness; for others, it was a refusal to admit defeat.

I’ve had my share of business challenges, which I have written about frequently. Bear with me while I refresh your memory: I have been in the envelope business for more than 50 years. Do people still use envelopes the same way or as often as they did in the 1960s? Not even close. That was before email, faxes, online bill pay, Facebook, Twitter and all forms of electronic communication. We could have easily closed our doors and given up.

Had we at MackayMitchell Envelope Company decided to live in the past, we would have defied our company motto: “To be in business forever.”

We needed to look at how businesses used our products in their changing environments. We had to retool machinery and retrain employees. We worked hard to introduce new lines of business and encourage our sales force to think of new ways to best serve our customers. It has been an ongoing process responding to every technological advance. Our only way forward was to be resilient enough to change with the times.

The only thing that never changes is change itself. Today, change comes faster than ever. To survive and thrive, the skill you need to master is resilience.

Susan Dunn, a clinical psychologist, has observed that people who can bounce back after failure and confront new obstacles without losing their nerve generally do these essential things:

-- Learn from experience. Resilient people reflect on what happens to them, good and bad, so they can move forward without illusion.

-- Accept setbacks and losses. You’ve got to face the reality of what has happened in order to get past it.

-- Recognize emotions. Resilient people don’t hide from their feelings. They identify what they’re feeling and express their emotions appropriately.

-- Keep time in perspective. Past, present and future are separate. Don’t mix them up by letting what’s in the past determine your choices in the here and now.

-- Think creatively and flexibly. Look for new ways to solve problems and face challenges.

-- Take care of yourself. Resilience is based on good physical and mental health. Get enough rest, eat sensibly and spend time with people who support you.

-- Ask for help. Resilient people don’t try to do everything themselves. Accept that you’ll need to ask others for assistance, and learn how to do so graciously and effectively.

I can’t think of any business that can’t adapt somehow. Kids who have never seen a manual typewriter are well-schooled on computer keyboards. Rotary telephones are relics, but how many of us are constantly connected to our smartphones, and can’t function without them? While Grandma looked forward to the iconic Sears catalog, online shopping provides a 24-hour marketplace. That’s how resilient businesses respond.

Former British Prime Minister Sir Winston Churchill was also a good example of resilience. He failed sixth grade. He was defeated in every election for public office until he was elected prime minister -- at age 62.

His best-known quote was also a rallying cry for resilience: “Never give in, never give in, never, never, never -- in nothing, great or small, large or petty – never give in except to convictions of honor and good sense. Never yield to force. Never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of the enemy.”

Mackay’s Moral: You don’t need a trampoline to be good at bouncing back.

Three men were in a pickup truck driving in the woods when they got stuck in the mud. The driver became angry and began to shout and curse. He pounded on the steering wheel and then sat fuming about their bad luck.

The second man climbed out of the truck and took refuge in the shade of a large tree. “I’m going to hang out here until someone comes along who can tow us out,” he said. He fumbled with his cellphone, getting more and more frustrated when he couldn’t get a signal to call for help.

The third man retrieved an ax and a saw and found a felled tree. He cut pieces to wedge under the tires so the truck could drive out of the mud.

We all get “stuck in the mud” at times as we travel down life’s road. Will you melt down, walk away and do nothing? Or will you embark on a course of action for getting unstuck?

The key is how to get unstuck. I’m referring to the times you feel uninspired or overwhelmed, lack focus, feel anxiety or consider giving up. Do you wait for someone else to shake you out of your funk? Do you ignore the situation and hope it goes away? Or do you reach inside to discover what works for you and use it? Here are some ideas I’ve heard.

Ever heard of power posing? American psychologist Amy Cuddy did a study that found if you stand for 120 seconds like Superman or Wonder Woman, your body chemistry changes. Testosterone increases and cortisol -- the stress hormone -- decreases, which make our bodies and minds feel better and more powerful.

Life coach Tony Robbins also believes the best way to get unstuck is not with your mind, but with your body. He stresses movement, breathing and shifting your body.

Clinical psychologists suggest that before you can get unstuck, you must figure out what the problem is and then deal with it. Studies show that paying more attention to your experiences can help you to gain greater control and insight into your emotions. It can increase your tolerances and help increase awareness. Paying attention to your experiences is a skill, just like riding a bicycle. The better you get at this, the less likely you will get stuck.

From time to time, even the most creative minds get stuck. Like a baseball player who can’t get a hit or a salesperson who can’t close a sale, someone in the midst of a slump can’t imagine the possibility of overcoming it. But ballplayers and salespeople who don’t give up usually manage to work their way out, and so can you. Try some of these strategies:

-- Take some time off. In other words, seek a change of scenery. Instead of increasing your frustration, back away for a while. Go to the movies, visit a museum or attend a sporting event. Taking your mind off the problem can give you a chance to recharge.

-- Talk to people. Don’t isolate yourself. Go out and talk with friends, family members, co-workers, whoever. You don’t have to ask for suggestions or advice. Just open yourself to other conversations and ideas, and allow your mind to shift out of the rut.

-- Change your routine. Shake up your day by taking on tasks in a different order or switching things around in your workplace. Delegate jobs you always do yourself and take on projects that you usually hand off, for example. Or start your day with long-term planning and end it by checking your email if you typically do the opposite.

-- Engage all your senses. Approach the problem from a different angle. What would a solution feel like in your hands, sound like as a song, taste like if it were a beverage? Don’t limit yourself to what you can see. Extend your mind in different directions, and you may find a dimension you hadn’t considered before.

-- Work out. Do something physical to get the blood flowing through your body and your brain. Hit the gym, lift some weights, go swimming or just take a long, brisk walk. Pay attention to your surroundings instead of thinking about the work you’re not doing. You may find a fresh idea right in front of you.

Mackay’s Moral: Don’t let getting stuck leave you out of luck.