life

The Importance of Constructive Criticism

Harvey Mackay by by Harvey Mackay
by Harvey Mackay
Harvey Mackay | September 19th, 2016

Lucy, the constant critic of Charlie Brown in the comic strip "Peanuts," is one of my favorite characters because she always says exactly what is on her mind.

Peeved at Charlie, she told him in one strip: "You are a foul ball in the line drive of life."

She is just as tough on her little brother Linus.

"Why are you always criticizing me?" Linus asks Lucy.

"Because I just think I have a knack for seeing other people's faults," Lucy says.

"What about your own faults?" replies Linus.

Without hesitation, Lucy answers right back, "I have a knack for overlooking them."

Criticism, even when offered as a helpful suggestion, is often unwelcome. It's hard to accept that your efforts are unappreciated or fail to meet expectations.

One of my favorite sayings is, "No one ever kicks a dead dog," which means you have to be doing something to get criticized. My point is not to take criticism personally. When a coach or a friend or a boss is criticizing you, it usually means they really care, and even though it may not feel like it, they want to help you.

According to an old saying, "Criticism is something you can avoid easily -- by saying nothing, doing nothing and being nothing."

Obviously, that isn't an option for anyone who wants to be successful in business or as a leader. Good leaders are active, and their actions frequently put them out front. Of course, that often draws criticism.

Even when it is meant to be constructive, criticism is sometimes difficult to deliver effectively. When you have to correct a mistake or improve an employee's performance, it is essential to get your message across without creating bigger problems.

Before you offer any criticism, think about what results or changes you need. Telling an employee, "You were totally ineffective," may be accurate, but it doesn't communicate what your expectations are. Your goal is to correct the problem, so you must think through what the employee needs to do differently.

Employees need to know exactly what they did wrong in order to improve. Explain the problem in precise terms: "You didn't bring the right equipment, which meant you took longer than necessary to complete the work."

Point out mistakes and problems, but don't dwell on them too long. Then start talking about how the employee can improve.

When an employee's performance improves, make a point of recognizing it. Reinforcing improvement will reduce the need for you to revisit the problem.

Ted Engstrom tells a story about a group of bright young men at the University of Wisconsin, who were aspiring poets, novelists and essayists. They met regularly to read and critique each other's work in sessions that became progressively more contentious. So merciless were their criticisms that the members of this exclusive club called themselves the "Stranglers."

The women of literary talent in the university started a club of their own, which they christened the "Wranglers." They also shared their work with each other, but the criticism was softer and more positive, even encouraging.

Twenty years later, an alumnus of the university did a study of the successes of the Stranglers as opposed to the Wranglers. None of the Stranglers could claim any significant literary accomplishment. The Wranglers boasted six or more successful writers including Marjorie Kinnan Rawlings, who wrote "The Yearling."

The talent and education levels were comparable, so why the difference? As Ted concluded, the Stranglers strangled, while the Wranglers highlighted the best, not the worst.

Successful leaders know better than to strangle, because they understand that results reflect their management skills. Constantly belittling or blaming means that either the employee isn't a good fit, or that the criticism isn't being delivered effectively.

Instead, good leaders follow the example of the Wranglers. Positive results start with a positive environment in which employees know that they will be treated with respect even when they make mistakes.

Consider the advice from the late Mary Kay Ash, founder of Mary Kay cosmetics: "Never giving criticism without praise is a strict rule for me. No matter what you are criticizing, you must find something good to say ... Criticize the act, not the person."

Mackay's Moral: Constructive criticism should always build up, not tear down.

life

Helpful Hints for a Successful Life

Harvey Mackay by by Harvey Mackay
by Harvey Mackay
Harvey Mackay | September 12th, 2016

When a lesson can be summed up in a few well-chosen words, the message often stays with the student. A little tool to jog the memory, a clever saying to remind you what is truly important -- that's why "Mackay's Moral" appears at the end of each of my columns. All of my books also have aphorisms to sum up chapters, as I find it a great way to teach.

I file away helpful sayings and use them to drive home the point when the occasion presents itself. I know this method is effective, because my readers often cite these witticisms in their letters and emails to me. I love that they remember these little nuggets and find them so useful.

For today's column, I am pleased to offer up some of my favorite aphorisms not used in my columns or books. They are self-explanatory and can stand on their own without a longer explanation. If you prefer, think of it as 37 quick columns all in one.

-- Enjoy the little things in life, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

-- Goals are like stars; they may not be reached, but they can always be guides.

-- A mistake proves that someone at least tried.

-- If we are facing the right direction, all we have to do is keep on walking.

-- What you build easily will fall quickly.

-- When life gives you 100 reasons to cry, show life that you have 1,000 to smile.

-- A word and a stone once thrown away cannot be returned.

-- It isn't hard to make a mountain out of a molehill; just add a little dirt.

-- Of all the things you wear, your expression is the most important.

-- Friendship is like a bank account. You can't continue to draw on it without making deposits.

-- A positive attitude is a magnet for positive results.

-- The key to keeping your balance is knowing when you've lost it.

-- Remember: It's not what you have, it's what you do with what you have that makes all the difference.

-- Life is a continuous process of getting used to things we haven't expected.

-- There's only one endeavor in which you can start at the top, and that's digging a hole.

-- You have to take it as it happens, but you should try to make it happen the way you want to take it.

-- Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

-- The trouble with self-made people is that they worship their creator.

-- If you always give, you will always have.

-- You can't get ahead when you're trying to get even.

-- The will to win is not nearly as important as the will to prepare to win.

-- No matter how much dirt you throw at someone else, you'll always be dirtier.

-- Judge other people's faults by their effect on the work, not by their effect on you.

-- The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails.

-- Too many people stop to think and forget to start again.

-- If you're not sure where you're going, you'll probably end up somewhere else.

-- Ten out of nine people don't realize they're weak in math.

-- Try not to become a person of success, but rather a person of value.

-- The grass isn't greener over there. It's greener where you water it.

-- Hire for character; train for skill.

-- You know you need a change when all you exercise is caution.

-- The person who makes no mistakes usually doesn't make anything.

-- Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing him- or herself.

-- Nursing a grudge is bad for your health.

-- Life is a bumpy road, and laughter is your best shock absorber.

-- Whether you think you can or think you can't, you're right.

-- We could learn a lot from crayons: Some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, some have weird names and all are different colors ... but they all exist very nicely in the same box.

Mackay's Moral: In the end, we only regret the chances we didn't take, the relationships we were afraid to have, and the decisions we waited too long to make.

life

Your Branding Should Be Outstanding

Harvey Mackay by by Harvey Mackay
by Harvey Mackay
Harvey Mackay | September 5th, 2016

"You can't stand out if you're trying to blend in." That's the message Sally Hogshead drives home in the updated edition of "Fascinate," her how-to handbook for making any brand impossible to resist.

"In any crowded marketplace, you have to make a choice," she writes. "Either have the biggest marketing budget ... or be the most fascinating. Otherwise, your messages will be ignored and forgotten."

Her research shows that a product or service can charge up to 400 percent more, without changing the product, by identifying how to fascinate buyers. She goes on to demonstrate how anyone can make anything fascinating. Her book gives the tools to prove it.

In her original version published in 2010, Sally explained how our brains become captivated by certain people and ideas. She shared the seven ways in which brands fascinate people, or as she puts it, "the why, but not the how."

The new version of her book includes more than 60 percent new content. Most exciting is the introduction of her Brand Fascination Profile, a process that enables you to measure the advantages of your own service or product.

Another new feature is TurboBranding, a step-by-step process that shows you how to create branding messages in about an hour.

Sound like useful information? You can't begin to imagine how many ways you can apply this advice. After all, as Sally writes, "Corporations don't create brands. People do."

What attracts people to certain branding messages and not others? "Every day, in every relationship, you're 'marketing' your ideas to be heard," Sally says. "You want clients to hire you, or customers to recommend you. ... Your influence will be measured by your ability to fascinate."

The word "fascinate" comes from the Latin "fascinare," which means "to bewitch or hold captive so that others are powerless to resist." Fascination is the most powerful force of attraction, drawing customers into a state of intense focus.

How do you harness this fascination? "If you master the forces that influence human behavior, you win," Sally says. "You can win bigger budgets, more time, better relationships, greater admiration, deeper trust."

But if you don't attract people, you lose the battle. She cautions: "As a business, if you can't persuade customers to act, you might as well donate your entire marketing budget to charity."

You will know that your brand is fascinating if you are provoking strong and emotional reactions, creating advocates and inciting conversation, or forcing your competitors to realign.

The examples and stories that Sally shares offer convincing evidence. One describes how women who were given the choice between sunglasses with a designer logo and plain sunglasses were willing to pay more for the logo, although the functionality of the product was the same. The experiment showed that they weren't concerned about buying something that was better, but something that was different.

"That's the heart of differentiation," she writes. "It's tough to be better. But far easier to be different."

Fascination goes beyond rational thinking, she says, "transforming customers into fanatics and your brand's products into must-have purchases."

But what if your marketing budget is limited? "The goal here is not to spend more money on marketing. It's actually to spend less money by marketing more effectively," Sally advises.

"Spend less, but see better results. Outthink instead of outspend. If you don't have the biggest budget, then be the most fascinating."

The real meat of this book comes in Part II, "The Seven Fascination Advantages: How to Make Your Brand Impossible to Resist." Here, Sally describes the creativity of innovation, the emotion of passion, the confidence built by power, the new standards set by prestige, the stability of trust, mystique's language of listening and the rules of alert.

She next moves into tactics, a practical system to customize your message. The seven advantages are coupled with specific tactics to position your message more effectively. Sally also shows how to combine the seven advantages with each other to customize your branding.

The closing section sends you on your way with a five-step action plan. The "Fascinate System" is not a "substitute for a full-service agency," she says. But "it condenses the time-honored marketing process into a streamlined and straightforward process for identifying your brand's message and key competitive advantage."

In a nutshell, "Fascinate" is fascinating. Your brand can be fascinating too.

Mackay's Moral: Big-time branding doesn't require a big-time budget, just a commitment to fascinate.

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