A few weeks ago, daredevil Nik Wallenda walked untethered atop Orlando's 400-foot-high Ferris wheel -- as it was spinning. This is the same guy who traversed a tightrope stretched across the Grand Canyon, Niagara Falls and between two Chicago skyscrapers.

In an interview, he said he wants to be an inspiration for others. People don't need to risk their lives, he clarified, but they should push themselves to do better and be greater.

One of the reasons we admire people who take risks is that most of us are scared stiff at the prospect of taking risks ourselves. "I could never do something like that," we say. Sometimes it seems that the only people who can take risks successfully are the people who have nothing to lose.

Fortunately, most of us will never have to worry about taking monumental risks. Of course, we use that to downplay the importance of the risks we do face. If it's not something that involves real, measurable danger -- skydiving, for example -- it's clearly not important as far as risks go. What you really mean is that you think the fear you feel about your "small" risk is misplaced -- an overreaction.

The same fear that keeps you from taking a tangible risk like skydiving can also keep you from seeking a promotion. It keeps you from going back to school to get your master's degree, or taking a vacation without checking messages every 45 minutes.

You don't call it fear, of course, but that's what it is. It's amazing how the human brain can be so effective at using circular reasoning and rationalization as a way to avoid taking action.

In short, playing it safe isn't the way to get ahead. You've got to go out on a limb sometimes -- but not so far that you fall off. Intelligent risk-taking involves these steps:

-- Know your motivations. What do you really want to achieve? Why? Don't take major chances on something you're not enthusiastic about. You'll work harder on goals that are important to you. Failure at something trivial may make you reluctant to try something really important to you.

-- Define success at the start. Figure out what you want to achieve in specific, measurable terms. You don't have to account for every variable, but you should have a solid idea of the results you're looking for.

-- Look at the best and worst outcomes. To evaluate risks and rewards, try to determine what the worst-case scenario would look like, whether the payoff is worth that risk and how you could prevent it from happening. Consider the best-case scenario as well: How will you recognize success? What will you do next? This helps you prepare for contingencies.

-- Consider your timetable. Do you have to take this risk right now? How quickly do you need results? Don't rush if you don't have to. Breaking your plan down into individual segments can help you minimize risks and learn what's needed to succeed.

-- Focus on benefits, not dangers. Keep the hazards in mind, but don't let them overwhelm you. Think about the potential outcome, and you'll be able to stay the course even when the road gets rocky.

-- Get started. You can make all the plans you want, but ultimately you have to take the leap. Don't turn preparation into a full-time activity. Determine what you need to begin, and then do it. You'll feel more energized when you're in the midst of the struggle than when you're just getting ready.

-- Do what matters to you. Taking a risk to please or impress someone else will not produce the gratification or results that you had hoped for. What is important to Nik Wallenda is most likely not on your to-do list.

Mackay's Moral: No risk, no success. Know risk, know success.

A soldier in an ill-equipped revolutionary army lost his rifle, so he went to his group's leader for a replacement.

"What am I going to do?" asked the soldier. "We are going to have a big battle tomorrow and I don't have a rifle."

"Don't worry," said his leader. "The other side doesn't have very good weapons either, and they are so brainwashed that they believe anything they hear. Just pretend you are pointing a rifle at them and say, 'Bang! Bang!' It will have the same effect as if you fired a real rifle at them."

"OK," said the soldier skeptically. "But I lost my bayonet too."

"Do the same thing," said his leader. "When the hand-to-hand combat begins, just point your fingers like this and say, 'Stab! Stab! Stab!' You'll see it has the same effect as using a bayonet."

The soldier was even more skeptical of this advice, but there wasn't anything he could do about it. As the sun came up, the enemy came charging over the hill right at him. And he held out his imaginary rifle, saying loudly, "Bang! Bang! Bang!" To his amazement one of them dropped, then another and then another.

But suddenly he saw a particularly fierce, huge enemy soldier coming right at him. Despite his best imaginary efforts, the enemy soldier kept coming right at him until he was just a few feet away.

"Stab! Stab! Stab!" said the frightened soldier, waving his fingers right at his adversary.

But nothing worked. The enemy soldier rolled right over him, kicking him in the stomach and stepping on his face. As he went by, the enemy soldier grunted, "TANK! TANK! TANK!"

Self-confidence alone won't help you succeed, but it's hard to get started or push through the inevitable obstacles without believing in yourself first. Do you struggle with self-confidence? Almost everyone does at some point.

And while you won't likely come up against any real tanks, the obstacles can set you back if you let them. Before that happens, you need to do a few things.

-- Review your accomplishments. You've already achieved some successes in your life, right? List them, on paper if necessary, and identify the skills and strengths you've used to succeed. Consult your list whenever you feel doubt coming on.

-- Seek new knowledge. If you're lacking any of the skills you need to achieve your goals, focus on learning them. The process will remind you that you're capable of growth, and mastering the skills will give you a mental boost.

-- Face your fears. Too often, we sabotage our self-confidence by hiding from what frightens us. Identify and examine your fears so you can take action against potential setbacks. You are more powerful than what you're trying to avoid.

-- Adjust your thought patterns. Negative thinking never yields positive results. Reboot immediately if you catch yourself doing any of these: all-or-nothing thoughts ("If I don't get this job, I'll be a total failure"), seeing only the downside ("I finished the project, but what if people see how tough it was for me?"), jumping to conclusions ("Bob didn't reply to my email -- he dislikes me"), or putting yourself down. Look for the positives in every situation. You can find them if you try.

-- Pay attention to your appearance. You don't have to buy a lot of expensive clothes, but devoting some time to your wardrobe and overall grooming can make you feel better about how you present yourself. A neat, professional look inspires confidence from others, and helps you put your best foot forward.

-- Know what you want. Specific goals inspire your best efforts. You'll feel more confident and capable with a clear idea of what you want to achieve in your life and career, not someone else's idea of what's important.

My friend Norman Vincent Peale, who wrote one of my all-time favorite books, "The Power of Positive Thinking," offered this advice: "Believe in yourself. Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers, you cannot be successful or happy."

Mackay's Moral: You can't buy confidence, but you can sell it!

A son and his father are walking in the mountains. Suddenly, the boy falls, scrapes his knee and screams.

To the son's surprise, he hears his scream repeating somwhere in the mountains.

Curious, he yells, "Who are you?" He receives the same answer. Angered at the response, he screams, "Coward," and hears the same thing in return.

He looks to his father and asks, "What's going on?"

The father smiles and says, "My son, pay attention." And he screams to the mountain, "I admire you!" Again the man screams, "You are a champion," both times hearing his words echoed back to him. The boy is surprised, but does not understand.

Then the father explains: "People call this echo, but really this is life. It gives you back everything you say and do. Our life is simply a reflection of our actions. If you want more love in the world, create more love in your heart. If you want competence in your team, improve your competence. This relationship applies to everything, in all aspects of life. Life will give you back everything you have given it."

Graduation season is upon us, and today I will devote my column to those who are about to embark on a new chapter in their lives. That isn't limited to new grads, by the way -– every day is a new chapter for each of us.

Waking up every morning hoping something wonderful will happen or someone will appear who will change your life is the equivalent of letting something or someone else control your life.

You need to be in charge. You need to decide what actions you will take that will come back to you. And then, you need to integrate those actions into your daily life. That may be a tall order for someone just starting out in a career, but you do have choices.

Let me remind you of a few basic rules of life.

-- Life isn't fair. You've heard this over and over, and yet when someone else gets the promotion, makes more money or takes credit for your work, you beat yourself up wondering what happened. Don't! If the situation is beyond your control, get over it and move on to the next opportunity. Wasting time being bitter will never make you better.

-- Don't just let things happen to you when you can make things happen for you. If you need more training or education, find a way to make it happen. If you truly hate your job, figure out where the problem is and fix it if you can. If you can't, look for other employment or let your entrepreneurial instincts take over.

-- Sometimes it's risky not to take a risk. Making a dream come true only happens when you step outside your comfort zone and chart new territory. And a funny thing will happen: After you start taking small risks, you will become more comfortable taking larger -- and more rewarding -- risks.

-- Pay attention. Stay on top of trends, developments, technology and opportunities. If you can see changes ahead, you can plan and position yourself rather than reacting and regretting. Few things in business stay secret for long. Listen and observe so you can be prepared.

-- Give back. My father drilled this lesson into my head from the beginning. There is always someone somewhere who needs your help, financial support or expertise. Give without expecting anything in return. You'll benefit in ways you never anticipated.

These rules are simple enough. Following them is not. You need to decide what is truly important to you, what values you will live by. Give serious thought to how you want to live so that you can be content with what life gives you back.

For all the new graduates staring at their futures and wondering what's ahead, as well as students of life in general, my wish is that you will never feel like life just happened to you. I wish you success, happiness, wisdom in your decisions and the power to live your dreams.

Mackay's Moral: Life is what you make it. Make it great!