Pressure. The very word strikes fear into many people. Winners thrive on pressure, while losers fear it.

What is pressure? My definition of pressure is when you absolutely have to do something you are not prepared to do. If you have to kick a field goal to win a big football game and you aren't prepared to do it, you are going to be nervous. You're going to feel pressure. But if you're really prepared for it, you can't wait to show people how good you are.

That's why winners look forward to pressure. It brings out their best. People who welcome pressure are more successful.

Conversely, pressure can cripple you if you're not prepared. When pressure is self-inflicted, it can control you. Pressure is an attitude. It's 10 percent of what is happening and 90 percent of how you handle it.

Don't be like my friend Mark. They used to call him "Jigsaw" because every time he was faced with a problem, he went to pieces.

To be a champion in sports, business or any realm of life, you have to learn to handle pressure. If you've prepared mentally and physically, you don't have to worry.

During my corporate speeches I repeat one of my favorite aphorisms: "Practice makes perfect -- not true. You have to add one word: Perfect practice makes perfect." I wish that I had coined that phrase, but I didn't. It's often credited to legendary pro football coach Vince Lombardi.

This is why, over my lifetime, I've had numerous coaches to help me develop whatever natural talent I have. I've had coaches for public speaking, writing, ideas/creativity, running marathons, golf, tennis, water skiing, swimming, bowling and basketball, to name only a few. I've even had a dance coach ... thanks to my wife.

Why do I have all of these coaches? Because whatever my God-given talent is, whatever my God-given potential is -- that's it. I can't do any better. But I will still try to do the best I can, with the best help I can get.

If I have a project, I'll have a time and action calendar, get the best coaching I can find and then try my hardest, focus and give it all I've got.

Should I feel pressure? Yes, but I will use it to my advantage. I'm as prepared as I can be. I can't do any more.

Research shows that one of the key ways to deal with pressure is to have a feeling of control. And what better way to be in control than to be prepared and experienced?

Take NASA as an example. NASA puts all its astronauts through situations they might encounter in space. Who can even begin to think about what might happen out there in the starry void? The moon is more than 238,000 miles away from Earth! Pressure? You better believe it. But they are prepared. If you are familiar with what is happening to and around you, you will have a powerful feeling of confidence.

Let's face it: No matter what, you are going to be in high-pressure situations. No one is free from pressure. It can't be avoided. Don't panic. Don't lose your cool. Concentrate. Return to fundamentals. Get your confidence back.

As simple as it sounds, try taking deep, relaxing breaths. Pressure often causes people to breathe more quickly and shallowly. Deep breathing allows oxygen to more efficiently enter the blood and the brain, which will help you think more clearly.

Don't stress over what you cannot control. Everybody gets a curveball now and then. Shake it off the best you can. Be flexible and appreciate adversity. It will help you grow stronger.

As Jacques Plante, a former professional hockey goalie for the Montreal Canadiens once said, "How would you like it in your job if every time you made a small mistake, a red light went on over your desk and 15,000 people stood up and yelled at you?"

Try to relax. Things could be worse.

Mackay's Moral: A diamond is a chunk of coal that made good under pressure.

One of the most important traits of any person is the value system by which he or she lives. I wonder how many of us ever take the time to sit down and really think through the moral precepts that consciously or unconsciously guide our lives.

I stumbled across this personal creed of 12 values -- often attributed to writer Robert Louis Stevenson ("Treasure Island") and certainly based on many of his writings -- many years ago, and I've always wanted to write about it because it is as true today as it was whenever it was written.

1. Make up your mind to be happy. Learn to find pleasure in simple things.

2. Make the best of your circumstances. No one has everything, and everyone has something of sorrow intermingled with the gladness of life. The trick is to make the laughter outweigh the tears.

3. Don't take yourself too seriously. Don't think that somehow you should be protected from misfortunes that befall others.

4. You can't please everybody. Don't let criticism worry you.

5. Don't let your neighbor set your standards. Be yourself.

6. Do the things you enjoy doing, but stay out of debt.

7. Don't borrow trouble. Imaginary things are harder to bear than the actual ones.

8. Since hate poisons the soul, do not cherish enmities and grudges. Avoid people who make you unhappy.

9. Have many interests. If you can't travel, read about new places.

10. Don't hold postmortems. Don't spend your life brooding over sorrows and mistakes. Don't be one who never gets over things.

11. Do what you can for those less fortunate than yourself.

12. Keep busy at something. A very busy person never has time to be unhappy.

What a terrific list! Can you imagine what the world would look like if we all followed such a code?

While I agree with all of these thoughts, I suspect we could all add a thing or two to fit our own needs. And I would encourage you to take some time to do just that in the near future. See if doing so doesn't help you define your goals and dreams.

What is really important to you? How do you want to conduct your life? What are you willing to do -- or not do -- in order to have the life you want? Is there a line you will not cross?

It is reasonable to expect that most adults would do their best to do the right thing. And that has taken on a new importance in the world we live in, where our words and deeds are often subject to cameras and shared online for the world to see. But having an established value system goes beyond that -- it takes the guesswork out. Because you have already thought about how you want to live and be perceived, your responses and reactions can often be automatic. You won't even have to think about them.

A remarkable book by retired Navy SEAL Mark Divine might provide the inspiration you need to organize your thoughts. In "The Way of the SEAL," Divine recalls his own experience of defining his purpose at officer candidate school.

His SEAL commander asked him what he stood for. His answer: "Justice, integrity and leadership," was not enough for the commander.

After some reflection, Divine wrote his personal stand:

-- "Destiny will favor me if I am prepared in mind, body, and spirit."

-- "I must work harder than expected and be more patient than others."

-- "Leadership is a privilege, not a right."

-- "As a warrior, I will be the last to pick up my sword but will fight to protect myself, my family, my country and my way of life."

-- "I will find my peace and happiness through seeking truth, wisdom and love, and not by chasing thrills, wealth, titles or fame."

-- "I will seek to improve myself, my team and the world every day."

So there you have it: two shining examples of personal values that -- even though separated by multiple decades -- still ring true. I challenge you to take some time and take a stand.

Mackay's Moral: If you live by a great value system, your life will have great value.

I love golf -- both playing and watching the pros -- so you can imagine my delight when my wife, Carol Ann, surprised me for my birthday with a trip to watch the Ryder Cup in Glasgow, Scotland, in late September. What a memorable experience, one that's been on my bucket list for a long time. The only thing that would have made it better would have been a victory for the USA!

Along with the spectacular scenery and outstanding golf, the thing that struck me most was the focus of all the players.

It's easy to have focus when everything is going well, but great athletes keep their focus when they are staring at defeat. A sure way to fail is to lose focus.

I remember when my close friend Lou Holtz was asked to speak to the American team at the 2008 Ryder Cup by then-captain Paul Azinger. Holtz told the players to remember the acronym WIN, which stands for "What's Important Now."

Holtz told the American athletes to evaluate the past but focus on the future. If you just made a bogey, what's important now? Your next tee shot. If you make a birdie, what's important now? Your next tee shot. You play one shot at a time and stay focused.

He finished by telling the players to enjoy the competition and what they were doing, but to stay focused. That team won, the last time the U.S. team brought home the Ryder Cup.

I watched Holtz do the same with many of the football teams he coached: Minnesota, Notre Dame and South Carolina. As Holtz said, think only about the next play or point, not what just happened. You can only focus on what will happen next. Don't look back and don't complain. If you maintain your focus on the future, anything can happen.

Years ago, when I played golf for the University of Minnesota, my coach, Les Bolstad, drove home a similar point about focus. I remember practicing and getting ready for the NCAA Golf Championship Tournament at Purdue University. Les told me to focus on each shot as if it were going to be my last. I would say to myself, "This is the last drive I'm ever going to hit, so it better be good. This is the last putt that I'm ever going to make," and so on.

I've carried that philosophy through to my work life. "This is the last speech I'm ever going to give, so it better be good. This is the last book I'm ever going to write ... This is the last acquisition I'm ever going to make. "

It takes that kind of focus to succeed. I'm convinced that one of the top things that keep people from getting what they want is lack of focus. People who focus on what they want to achieve, prosper; those who don't, struggle.

Forbes Magazine recently did a story on the nine habits of productive people. One of them was focus, specifically using your morning to focus on yourself and ignore the demands of other people.

I couldn't agree more. I make my to-do list every morning by working backward: What do I need to accomplish by the end of the day, week and month? That tells me where to focus.

But what about getting your work team focused on the right goals? The Change Management website offers this simple test: Ask everyone in your group what the organization's mission is, how it affects their jobs and how they contribute to it.

If a significant percentage can't provide a persuasive answer, you need to either communicate your mission more consistently and effectively, or change it so people understand their roles better. A business can't succeed without a common focus.

This idea predates modern business culture, as evidenced by this old fable: A martial arts student approached his teacher with a question. "I'd like to improve my knowledge of the martial arts. In addition to learning from you, I'd like to study with another teacher in order to learn another style. What do you think of this idea?"

The master answered, "The hunter who chases two rabbits catches neither one."

Mackay's Moral: Stay focused on one thing. Trying to get everything will get you nothing.