DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are raising our 7-month-old daughter together, and we generally get along well. I love him very much, but he has a habit that worries me. He's constantly on the lookout for a new job. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but every couple of months he says he's bored and wants to work somewhere else. These are decent-paying jobs, but they never pay much more than what he's earning now. They are also not always located in the same city or even the same state we live in.

I don't oppose moving away or moving up, but I don't want to move clear across the country when the benefit won't significantly add to what we have now and the relocation creates a burden with moving expenses.

Recently, my father made an offhand comment during a conversation about a business that offers good pay, benefits, etc. -- nearly the same benefits and pay my husband is receiving now. It would require that we move out of state, and I'd have to search for a new job.

My husband has been at his current job less than a year, and I have been at mine less than six months. We just signed a new lease on our apartment. He wants to break the lease and move. What can I do to convince him that this is not a strategic move for our family at this time? -- STRESSED-OUT WIFE AND MOM

DEAR STRESSED-OUT: I don't recommend breaking your lease and moving at this point because it will damage your credit. I don't know what your husband's problem is -- whether he has trouble getting along with his co-workers or attention deficit disorder -- but things won't improve until you determine the cause.

Neither of you has a solid job history. In a few short years, your daughter is going to be in preschool, and you do not want to constantly disrupt her education or socialization. Stay put until a move will be more financially beneficial.

DEAR ABBY: An elderly couple moved in next door. They once mentioned that they believed mothballs would keep ants away. That's not all. Every time they open their garage door, we get blasted with the stench. It is so pungent we must retreat inside our house, which is about 80 feet from their property. We can't open our windows, sit on our deck or do yard work outside until their garage door comes down. I don't know how they stand it. How can we let them know it's affecting our quality of life without causing a permanent rift? -- STUNK OUT IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR STUNK OUT: Contact your local health department to report what you are enduring and to share your concerns. Mothballs are not supposed to be used in the manner you have described. If you live in an area with a homeowner's association, it also may be able to help. However, if there isn't one, you may have to bite the bullet and ask these neighbors to close their garage door more quickly because the scent of mothballs is making you ill.

DEAR ABBY: I am a longtime divorcee and a retiree with grown kids. What is troubling me is I've always had an issue with taking a shower and all the oil and dirt flowing down my body. I think it's gross, so I usually wash my hair in the kitchen sink. I also don't get in the shower to wash my body. I hate getting out of the shower and feeling cold, or trying to get dressed partially wet.

When I've been in relationships, I force myself to shower or wipe down with hospital-type wipes. (I still wash up this way, just not regularly, and I know it's gross.) I dry shave my legs and underarms when needed, but this is really an issue for me. I brush my teeth twice a day. I use a light perfume and often get compliments, but I know from reading your advice that seniors lose their sense of smell and I could be ripe.

I don't know how to overcome this, and, for obvious reasons, I don't have a friend I can float this by. I'm healthy and, like everyone, struggle with depression, but I don't feel it's bad enough to seek professional help. I'm on a fixed income.

Just curious as to what your thoughts are on this. It's been a good six weeks since I've had a proper shower, and I find no justification for it other than I don't enjoy it. -- UNSHOWERED IN ILLINOIS

DEAR UNSHOWERED: If I thought your quirk could be solved as easily as buying a portable heater for your bathroom, I would suggest it. You state that you suffer from depression "like everyone else." From the mail I receive, people do have problems interacting with interpersonal relationships, workplace issues, etc., but they do not "all" suffer from depression.

Although you live on a fixed income, you could benefit from discussing your issue with a licensed psychotherapist. Help is available on a sliding financial scale through your county's department of mental health or your local university with a department of psychology. While medication might help you overcome your depression, getting to the root of your shower avoidance will likely happen once you start talking.

DEAR ABBY: My question is about dating among older adults. I have been on a dating website for a while now. Most of the profiles are fake. I finally encountered a legitimate profile of a nice-looking man, and we are now talking. After one week, we are finally going to meet for dinner. I'm thrilled, but he stated that he has "baggage." When I asked him what kind, he replied, "It's physical." What does that mean?

We have discussed being intimate and, at our age, we are no longer virgins. I intend to go on the date and be gracious and kind, but I am more than a little confused. What are your thoughts? I thought we clicked or I wouldn't be going on a date with him. What did I miss? -- PERPLEXED IN FLORIDA

DEAR PERPLEXED: The nice-looking man who has made a date with you could have been alluding to any number of physical problems. He might be missing a limb or need assistance getting around, or he may be impotent. Because he didn't give you the laundry list he included in his "baggage," you are just going to have to find out for yourself and take this a step at a time.

DEAR ABBY: I have been in a relationship for seven years. My significant other, "Gabe," and I bought a home together. We are also raising three of his grandsons. I pay half of the mortgage, utilities, food, maintenance and personal necessities. We both pay for our own insurance, car loans and gas.

Abby, there are four of them and one of me. This means utilities and food are used more by them than by me. I'm always after the boys to turn off the lights when not in use and to shut the doors after entering and leaving the house. We live in Arizona, so you can imagine electric bills during the summer, especially in a very large home.

Because Gabe earns more money than I do, I have tried talking to him about the cost. I feel he should pay a higher percentage. Each time, I give him the monthly amount that I spent. He then goes through it with a fine-tooth comb and pays only what he thinks he should pay for. We argue about it every single month. It's driving me nuts, and the upfront costs are breaking me. Please advise. -- PAYING MORE THAN ENOUGH

DEAR PAYING: That Gabe earns more than you do should have been taken into consideration at the time you began living with him and his grandsons. Financial counseling might help you to determine what such an adjustment would mean in terms of dollars. The National Foundation for Credit Counseling is a reliable resource. Because these monthly financial disagreements could erode your relationship, please consider couples counseling in order to work out a plan that is fair for all parties concerned.

DEAR ABBY: I'm having problems dealing with the death of my fiance, who died by suicide 10 months ago. I blame myself partly for his death. While I realize I didn't buy the medicine that killed him, I did move out of the house we shared because of his attitude toward me.

I can't seem to come to terms with his death. I feel responsible because I left the home we shared. I am seeing a counselor, but I'm not making the progress I was wishing I could. Do you have any advice for me and others who've gone or are going through this? -- SPIRALING IN FLORIDA

DEAR SPIRALING: Please accept my sympathy for the loss of your fiance. When someone dies by suicide, survivors are often shocked and traumatized. You didn't mention if your fiance suffered from depression, job loss, a physical ailment or some other condition that may have caused him to act out. If he was abusive to you, you did the right thing by moving out. This is nothing to feel guilty for.

I'm glad you are receiving counseling. Many survivors have been helped by talking things through with a licensed psychotherapist. The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, established in 1987, lists worldwide suicide bereavement support groups as a public service to loss survivors. It can be accessed at afsp.org. Please don't wait to reach out.