DEAR ABBY: I have been in love with a married man for more than 16 years. It started before he married, but I was married at the time, so he married her. He always told me he wouldn't leave his wife, but I hoped he would.

Three weeks ago, I told him I could no longer go on this way and to have a great life. Two weeks later, he emailed me asking if he was still in my heart and said he was having doubts about his marriage. We live 400 miles apart, but I drove to see him last weekend.

He told me he loved me, which he's never admitted before, and said he isn't sure what he's going to do. Now I don't know what to do, either, or how to act. Do I keep moving on to find someone else in case he doesn't pick me, or contact him so he doesn't lose sight of me? -- HURTING HEART IN VIRGINIA

DEAR HURTING HEART: This person told you he would never leave his wife, and for 16 years he has stuck to his word. He told you he loves you because you drew the line. This is his attempt to reel you back into a relationship that is headed nowhere. Please, for your own sake, keep moving and do not contact him again.

DEAR ABBY: Nine years ago, I severed all ties with my mother-in-law after she accused my husband of sexually assaulting his sister when she was in her teens. His sister died nine years ago from starvation after she was diagnosed with schizophrenia. Since then, I have not spoken to his mother. However, two of my children are recently married. I'm starting to feel guilty for not telling her that her two grandchildren got married. Should I say something to her? -- FEELING GUILTY IN ILLINOIS

DEAR FEELING GUILTY: I do think you should speak to her. It is a shame that she has lost both of her children. If you think it would make her feel better, you and your husband could tell her about the weddings -- but only in the context of healing the breach that may have been created because of a delusion suffered by your late, mentally ill sister-in-law.

DEAR ABBY: My 21-year-old grandson is a dramatic and arrogant know-it-all. My issue is that he's disrespectful to me, especially in social situations. He'll roll his eyes or flap his arms around as if I have two heads. He's actually mean-spirited. I'm not sure how to handle it. Should I simply ignore him, or should I confront him with how I feel? -- MISERABLE GRANDMA IN OHIO

DEAR GRANDMA: You should definitely tell him how you feel if you haven't already done it. He's acting like an overgrown adolescent. If his behavior continues, avoid him, if possible, as you would any other person who treats you with disrespect.

P.S. Also give serious consideration to "avoiding" him on his birthday, at Christmas, during graduation and any other gift-giving occasion.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a gay man who is best friends with "Carl," a man who is straight. We are everything you'd expect of a normal friendship. On a surface level, there is no difference. He goes well out of his way to make me feel welcomed and accepted, and I appreciate it.

Recently, Carl found a significant other. I'm happy for him, because he really does deserve it. The problem is, I am jealous. I know without a shadow of a doubt that my relationship with Carl will never be anything more than platonic. I think I know why this bothers me so much -- Carl is nice, smart and attractive, and we get along amazingly -- yet someone other than me is with him.

Abby, the thing is, I never wanted to be with him before. (My darkest secret: I recently stole one of his shirts because I wanted part of him with me.) Now I feel like I betrayed our friendship, and I am a thief. I have so many mixed emotions. How should I handle our friendship going forward? -- LOST IN ARKANSAS

DEAR LOST: Your feelings under these circumstances are not unusual. You are afraid that because a third person has been put in the mix, your special relationship with Carl will be lost or diminished. It doesn't have to be that way. You were always friends, and you can continue to be.

However, you may have to branch out and build new relationships, which will not only fill any empty time, but may also lead to you finding a special someone of your own. If you do not feel better after branching out, and there's an LGBTQ center near you, please consider talking to a counselor there to help you through this. If there isn't one, search online for emotional support.

DEAR ABBY: My husband recently lost a substantial amount of weight. He's 30 pounds lighter and has been maintaining it with up to a 10-pound fluctuation. Before he lost the weight, his family constantly commented on his weight and would ridicule him. They'd poke his stomach and say, "What's this?" in a not nice way. After he lost the weight, they continued with comments like, "Where'd your stomach go?" They never seem to cease. If he's on the heavier side, they comment about him gaining the weight back (it isn't true; the scale doesn't lie).

My husband is tired of being picked on and beaten down. He is at a healthy weight and happy with his body when he isn't being degraded. How should we let his family know we don't appreciate these comments? To clarify, this includes not only his immediate family but also his extended relatives. What would be a good way to tactfully say -- in the moment -- that we don't appreciate their commentary? -- PICKED ON IN OREGON

DEAR PICKED ON: I'm not sure you should handle these relatives with kid gloves. It might have more impact if your husband tells them, calmly, that he has tolerated their comments about his weight, but he finally has a handle on it and doesn't need their constant "weigh-ins." They are neither helpful nor funny, and they should stop. If not, they'll be seeing less of the two of you.

DEAR ABBY: My sister-in-law "Bethany" has been diagnosed with PTSD from her military service. For the past 15 years, Bethany has picked fights with my wife, her sister, over anything and everything. She feels my wife "changed" after she married me.

Bethany didn't like how we treated their father after we moved in four years ago so we could take care of him. (He recently passed.) She also doesn't like that we are living in the house that was her childhood home. She starts fights that escalate into screaming matches, while making herself out as the victim. She keeps reminding us that she has PTSD. My wife screams, cries and sobs during these conversations.

My wife won't cut Bethany off because they're siblings, but I'm sick and tired of seeing her in tears trying to figure out what she did wrong. Whenever Bethany comes to visit, she ends up staying at our house. The fights are unbearable. I have begged and pleaded for my wife to cut her off. It's affecting me now. Any advice would be appreciated. -- POWERLESS IN MICHIGAN

DEAR POWERLESS: Please share this with your wife. Has it not occurred to her that she has done nothing wrong, and that Bethany's rages may have less to do with PTSD than plain old jealousy? By now, the two of you must have realized that the price of having a relationship with her sister is too high. That your wife would allow herself to be repeatedly abused this way mystifies me.

When Bethany starts up again, your wife should hang up the phone. If Bethany shows up and can't control herself, she should not be allowed in. If she's already in, she should be told to leave immediately. Until the two of you draw a firm line, nothing will change, and it could very well destroy your marriage.

DEAR ABBY: After 28 years, I found out my husband, "Jerry," was having an affair. While we were in the middle of the divorce, my nephew was getting married, and I told Jerry that, considering the circumstances, it was improper for him to go. I also told him that although he was denying everything and telling our daughters he had done nothing, my family knew everything.

Jerry insisted on going, but I told him he would not be in family pictures and wasn't invited to the reception. Abby, he insisted on sitting in the pew with our daughters and me, and even tried to walk my mother in. Was what he did in bad taste and improper etiquette? To me, it felt like another slap in the face. -- DIVORCED BUT NOT DONE

DEAR DIVORCED: That your almost-ex-husband would force his way into the wedding and sit with you and your daughters was gross bad manners. Was he invited by your nephew's family? If he wasn't, I hope he didn't show up uninvited to the reception, which could have caused a major disruption. I think you will be well rid of this man.