DEAR ABBY: My husband of almost 40 years is not well. He has been a good provider, but his life stories are heavily laced with lies. That has been very difficult for me to live with.
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I believe he will die before I do, and I'm uncomfortable about holding a service for him. His obituary would be filled with half-truths and lies. Because of his work positions, it would be expected that we have a service. I wouldn't know what to say without the probability of repeating his lies. Have you any suggestions on how this could be handled? -- LIAR'S WIFE IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR WIFE: As a matter of fact, I do. When a husband dies, the person who is usually responsible for the creation of his obituary is his spouse. If you want it to be truthful, do not repeat his lies. State his age and place of birth. Mention his parents and siblings. Say that you and his children (if there are any) are mourning the loss of a loving, caring husband and father. Omit anything that has to do with his work life. As to having a public service, no law says you must. You can have a graveside service for family only.