DEAR ABBY: My husband is tired of paying to keep my eggs frozen. He has seven children of his own. I know utility costs are through the roof these days, but I can't disagree with him more.

He meets up with his friends at the breakfast joint every weekend, and they drop a lot of money there. If he just reallocated his spending money, we could afford to continue freezing my eggs. I keep telling him, "You're spending money on the wrong eggs!" I'd like to have a baby within the next year. What should I do? -- FREEZING IN FARGO

DEAR FREEZING: If your husband doesn't already know how important having your own child is to you, now is the time to impress it upon him. I am sorry you didn't mention how long he has been paying for freezing your eggs, but if you hope to conceive next year, he can afford to continue paying a few months longer. Would his preference be that you remain childless? If that's the case and you have been misled, you might want to consult a family law attorney.

DEAR ABBY: I was invited to the wedding of my friend's daughter, "Alexa." Alexa and her fiance's registry requested only money to go toward a honeymoon. About a week before the wedding, I sent a monetary gift via their online wedding registry.

The next day, I heard the wedding had been postponed indefinitely, although they are still together. I feel the right thing for them to do is to return my money, but it appears they don't intend to do so. Should I ask for my gift to be returned? What is the protocol? -- TRICKED IN TENNESSEE

DEAR TRICKED: In light of the fact that the wedding (and honeymoon to which you contributed) have been canceled, you have every right to ask for your gift to be returned. Suggest it first to Alexa, and if the money isn't forthcoming, tell your friend. What her daughter did could be considered fraud.

DEAR ABBY: My girlfriend of 17 years is constantly coming at me looking for an argument lately. I can't figure it out for the life of me. We have built a nice life. We have a child together, a house and two dogs. She has recently been saying something about perimenopause, which I know nothing about. I love what we have and I don't want to lose it, but I have no clue how to fix it. Please advise me so I don't lose my family. -- FEARFUL IN NEW JERSEY

DEAR FEARFUL: Go online and search "perimenopause." This is a time in women's lives when our hormone levels are changing, which can affect sleep, mood and body temperature, among other things.

This is something every woman experiences sooner or later, and it's important you understand it. Volumes have been written on the subject, which will help you gain empathy and insight. Because this is causing challenges in your relationship, don't procrastinate. Start now.

DEAR ABBY: I lost 15 years of my daughter's life when her mother left the state we were living in without my knowledge. We had a boy and girl during our 15 years of marriage and had agreed to joint custody. We weren't supposed to move more than 50 miles from each other so the kids would be close to both of us.

Once my daughter turned 10, I didn't see her again until she was 25. When I finally located her, I realized they had moved down South. When we reunited, I learned that some of my relatives knew where my daughter was, and said nothing.

I recently went through a bout with cancer. Because my son thought I was going to die, he decided to clear his conscience. He admitted that at age 13, he told my ex to go ahead and leave the state so I couldn't have a relationship with my daughter. I love both my kids equally, but now I feel betrayed by my son. Any suggestions? -- SAD DAD IN THE MIDWEST

DEAR DAD: So your spouse used advice from her 13-year-old son to take your daughter and disappear, and even though some of your relatives knew you were searching for your child, they kept mum? I have heard of dysfunctional families, but yours takes the cake.

Was your son's motive for telling his mother to leave while he stayed behind with you because of sibling rivalry? Although he was immature at the time, from my perspective, I agree it was a betrayal. Getting past this may involve many months of counseling and the help of a licensed family therapist. If that's what you want, start now.

DEAR ABBY: I have a young adult neighbor who is a talented mechanic. He builds model autos and tries them out up and down our street. His latest is a three-wheel motorcycle, which he drives in the wrong direction, without a helmet. He also revs its motor constantly. I'm worried our street will become a hangout for more motorcycle enthusiasts.

I'm also concerned that if I ask him to stop, he'll get angry. I approached him once and reminded him of safety issues, but at that time he wasn't racing his motor. It's worse now because the noise is distracting, and he repeatedly passes my home. What would be a good neighborly response to this? -- IRRITATED IN MISSOURI

DEAR IRRITATED: Ask your other neighbors if they, too, are bothered by the noise. If the answer is yes, then approach the young man as a group and explain that, while his mechanical abilities are admirable, the noise when he revs his engine is distracting, and it would be appreciated if he didn't do it in the area of your homes.

If this doesn't remedy the problem, check the noise ordinances in your community to see if he is violating any of them. (The answer could be as simple as the young man installing a muffler on his bike.)

DEAR ABBY: I have been married to my husband for 23 years. We are both originally from Europe. He hasn't seen his brother in 25 years, so we are planning to go on vacation near where his brother is currently living with his girlfriend. My husband will pay for them, as they can't afford a trip, and they'll be staying with us for two or three days.

My dilemma: My husband expects us ALL to share a two-bedroom hotel suite. Abby, I do not know these people. I'm anxious about sharing a suite with people I have never met and with whom I do not share a common language.

I have expressed my unease to my husband and asked if we could have two separate hotel rooms. He was very upset at my suggestion and said it will cost him more to arrange two rooms. He now wants to cancel the trip due to my "selfishness." Am I being unreasonable? -- NERVOUS IN NEW YORK

DEAR NERVOUS: Because your husband feels he cannot afford to pay for completely separate accommodations, tell him you will agree to his plan with certain ground rules in place. First, he must translate for you any conversations he has with his brother and the girlfriend in which you are present. (This is time-consuming, hard work!) Second, you will be free to take excursions on your own if you wish, so you aren't trapped the entire time listening to conversations that are Greek to you.

Give it a try, and you may be pleasantly surprised to find you like your brother-in-law and his lady friend. If it turns out you don't, you do not have to go along on your husband's next visit, which may not happen for another quarter of a century.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been together for six years. Until about 18 months ago, my mother-in-law and I got along swimmingly. Unfortunately, that relationship has become troubled. The cause is her deep involvement with her church, indoctrinating our toddler with her religious beliefs and, finally, (ironically) her deep physical attraction to her priest. She believes this last topic is acceptable to confide to me. Needless to say, it has made me very uncomfortable, and I have begun avoiding her.

This is difficult because she and my father-in-law live in the downstairs apartment of our home. My husband, thankfully, understands my position. We both have spoken to his mother several times, to no avail. I've reached the end of my rope, and I'm asking for any advice you may have as to how to handle this awkward situation. -- ROUGH WATERS IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR ROUGH WATERS: Because you can't change your mother-in-law, the most direct way to handle this would be to tell her that her confidences have made you uncomfortable, and you don't want to hear another word about her physical attraction to the cleric. I assume your father-in-law is aware of all this? If not, she should inform him.

I will further assume that because your in-laws are family, you don't plan to ask them to move. Putting an end to her attempts to indoctrinate your toddler is as easy as hiring a babysitter.