DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been married 45 years. We are both retired and have hobbies to keep us busy. My problem is, he has so many friends that he doesn't have time for any of the things I would like us to do together. I seem to be the last person he wants to do anything with. I don't mind some alone time, but after a while, I feel lonely and left behind. If a vacation is planned, it's always planned around his schedule. -- LONELY IN MINNESOTA

DEAR LONELY: Could you possibly develop an interest in any of the hobbies your husband enjoys? That way you could be alone less of the time. If that's not possible, tell him you are unhappy and the current arrangement makes you feel lonely and isolated. Too much time alone isn't healthy. If he's willing to do some compromising, your problem is solved. However, if he is inflexible, you will have to find more activities to fill your time that involve other people.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have two close friends. They were a married couple but are now in the middle of a nasty divorce. Last winter, while they were still together, they came over and brought along an outdoor heater for us to borrow. It broke while it was in our care, so we bought them a new one. They knew it was in our garage, but they never came to pick it up. (Back story: He cheated and is keeping their house. She kept a lot of the indoor/outdoor items, some over his objection.)

My husband called him last weekend to remind him, again, to pick it up. Coincidentally, today she asked me for it and wants to come and get it ASAP and beat him to it. In all fairness, I don't know who it should go to. I hate being in the middle, and I hate confrontations. My husband feels it should go to the husband because he called and reminded him. What should we do? -- CAUGHT IN THE MIDDLE

DEAR CAUGHT: Give these former spouses a deadline after which you want that heater off your property. Whichever one gets there first can have it. Do not involve yourselves further.

DEAR ABBY: There is a man I may be attracted to and have a lot in common with. The problem is that his teeth are crooked and yellow, and I can't get past that. He's quite a bit older than I am, so I'm not sure that we would get together even if he got his teeth fixed. But I won't know unless something is done. I'm not someone who likes confrontation, so I'm having a hard time saying something. How do I deal with this problem? -- FROWNING OVER HIS SMILE

DEAR FROWNING: It would be appropriate to wait until you are SURE you are attracted to this person. Then, if you decide you are, talk to him at a time when you are both relaxed. Smile and say something like this: "You know, 'John,' you are such an attractive person. Perhaps you should consider talking to your dentist about having a little work done. If you did, you'd be an absolute Adonis." His response should reveal if there is a path forward together, or give him something to chew on.

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I have been married for 17 years and have three wonderful daughters, ages 13, 10 and 5. Lately, I've felt like I'm the odd man out in a girls-only club. I wish I had a son I could share my interests with. I'd love to have someone I could take fishing, teach about classic cars and play football and baseball with. I have tried introducing those interests to my girls, but they're not into them.

Don't get me wrong. I love my daughters beyond words. I beam with pride at their cheerleading competitions, at their dance recitals and at family gatherings, and I thank God for them daily. I recently asked my wife if we could try to have one more child in the hopes of having a son. My wife is healthy, all three pregnancies went fine and we both make enough money to be good providers. She said she would "think about it."

I found out she mentioned this to her mother and sister, both of whom are livid. Her mom compared me to King Henry VIII. Abby, wishing I had a son doesn't mean I don't love my daughters. It hurts that such a thing was suggested. Am I in the wrong to want to try one more time? -- GIRL DAD IN NEW YORK

DEAR GIRL DAD: You are not wrong. Your feelings are your feelings, and you are entitled to have them. This decision is something that should be between you and your wife, not her extended family. If she feels three children are all she can handle, consider finding young males with whom to share your interests. Consider mentoring fatherless boys who need a role model. Go online and do some research. You may find there are opportunities in your community. However, if there aren't, contact Big Brothers Big Sisters of America because there's a need for the mentoring you could offer.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a high school student. I have many friends and acquaintances I consider near and dear to my heart. However, this year I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety, and both have impacted my relationships. I have this problem where I tend to "soak up" the emotions of my friends and loved ones.

If a friend is feeling sad, I do my best to make them feel better (I have been assigned the role of "therapist friend"), but no matter the outcome, I always end up feeling sad. If my friends are happy, I'm happy; if my friends are depressed, I'm depressed. My therapist has described me as an "empath" and a "sponge."

I have yet to find how to live my own, independent life. I'm sick and tired of feeling the way I feel because of other people. What can I do? -- STRUGGLING IN THE NORTHWEST

DEAR STRUGGLING: You are already working with a therapist. That's good news. Now that you know what your diagnosis is, you have someone who can help you manage your emotions so they won't swamp you. Be patient. Your therapist will help you find the tools to accomplish this, and they will be important for you later in life.

DEAR ABBY: I used to have a great relationship with my mother-in-law. I considered her one of my best friends, until her severe drug and alcohol abuse began to ruin her life. Her mental health issues came out in full force, and her lashing out reached a peak shortly before I married her son. After a barrage of nasty messages, she was no longer welcome at our wedding. I have blocked her from contacting me. She occasionally reaches out to my husband to talk only about herself.

We are thinking about starting a family in the next few years, and I'm terrified of her having access to our child. Do we have an obligation to let her meet our child, or even let her know one exists? She was a terrible mother to my husband (the authorities had to step in, and she was incarcerated) and she relinquished rights to her other child. This screams to me that she shouldn't have access to any grandchildren.

After she verbally attacked me, I don't even want her to know if I become pregnant. My husband isn't completely on board with keeping her in the dark, but he agreed not to tell her anything without us being on the same page. He is a thoughtful husband, but feels bad about being asked to keep such a big secret. I'm filled with anxiety about her even knowing about a baby. I would greatly appreciate your advice. -- ANXIOUS IN WISCONSIN

DEAR ANXIOUS: When someone becomes pregnant, they do better with as little stress in their lives as possible. While I admire your husband's compassion for his volatile, unstable and abusive mother, he needs to accept that involving her in this chapter of your family life might not be the best decision for you or his child. If you can't get through to him, enlist the help of your doctor and someone with expertise in child development to help him understand that everyone will be healthier if she remains out of the picture. She may find out eventually, but you will be safe in the short term.

DEAR ABBY: I host an annual party for many longtime friends. Some of them bring their (small) dogs, and that's OK. My problem is, one friend brings their giant dog. The last time "Brutus" was here, it was seen snatching food off the kitchen counter and the dining table. I love this friend, but I don't love that dog in my kitchen and dining room.

Normally I would just say, "Please don't bring Brutus," but I can't. My friend is now blind and says Brutus is their Seeing Eye dog. (Brutus doesn't act like any Seeing Eye dog I've ever seen. He's very undisciplined.) I'm at a loss about what to do or say. Do you have any advice for me? -- AWKWARD IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR AWKWARD: Yes. Service dogs wear a harness or a vest. They also are trained not to leave their owner's side. They never behave the way Brutus has, so it's safe to assume this person may have been less than honest with you about their own status, as well as their dog's. My advice is to omit this person off your guest list, and if you are asked why, be truthful.