DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend of four years (the father of my two little boys) and I have decided to separate. We got along, but when we did argue, it escalated. We bought a home together a year ago, but two weeks ago he moved back to his parents' house. We alternate the boys every two or three days.

Our issues could have been fixed, but we were too prideful. Now I'm starting to have regrets -- what have I done? We could have been a family for our little boys. I wanted this separation in order to work on myself and repair our relationship. But he seems happier now and is enjoying the separation, while I cry myself to sleep hoping that one day we will get back together. How do I move forward to truly be happy for myself and my boys? -- SAD MOMMY IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR SAD MOMMY: People move forward by learning from their mistakes. Wait another week or so and ask your former boyfriend how he feels about relationship counseling to settle your issues. If he is truly happier living with his parents and unwilling to do the work necessary for a lasting relationship, give yourself time to heal from this breakup, and when you are emotionally balanced again, start moving on with your life.

DEAR ABBY: Sixty years ago I had a brief extramarital affair that resulted in the birth of a son. For a multitude of reasons I have never revealed the identity of his biological father to him or anyone else. I recently learned his daughter is doing some DNA testing, and I'm afraid my long-ago lie will be discovered. I do not want my son, my granddaughter or anyone else to discover it this way. Do you have any advice on how I should handle it? -- HOLDING ONTO A SECRET

DEAR HOLDING: If possible, meet with your son in person and tell him the whole story. Do it in quiet, private surroundings. I am sure he will have many questions, and you should be prepared to answer them honestly. I agree with you that he should hear this news from you rather than his daughter.

DEAR ABBY: I don't think I've ever seen this suggestion in your column, but maybe it's just too obvious. When a reader sends a letter and receives advice from you, why doesn't that reader give that "Dear Abby" column to the "problem" person? No confrontation, no interpretation -- just counsel straight from Abby's mouth, so to speak. That's what I would do if you gave me advice. -- LOGICAL IN FLORIDA

DEAR LOGICAL: I hope not. The most unwelcome "advice" in the world is that which is unasked for. Some readers have clipped my column and sent it anonymously to someone they thought "needed" it, but I think the practice is cruel and cowardly. If you have a friend you think has a problem, "suggest" the person write me for an unbiased opinion if you wish. But to do what you are suggesting could be considered a breach of someone's privacy and cause hurt feelings.

DEAR ABBY: My sister "Darby" and I are in our 20s and confused about the relationship she is in. She's 23 and has been dating a 22-year-old man. They fight a lot because he can't stop talking about her ex-boyfriend. He says he visualizes her having sex with him, and is frustrated with himself for not being able to get the images out of his head. Is there a name for this particular problem, and how can Darby work with it? -- SUPPORTIVE SIS IN THE WEST

DEAR SIS: Yes, actually, there are two names for this "condition." They are obsession and jealousy, and both are signs of potential control issues. Stay close to your sister and be there for her, because this young man's behavior is a red flag.

Darby and her boyfriend are both adults. I assume neither came to the relationship wrapped in cellophane. His fixation should not be hers (or yours) to fix. Because he can't get the images out of his head, he should schedule a few sessions with a licensed psychotherapist, since his problem will continue the longer he is in the dating world.

DEAR ABBY: I moved in with my boyfriend six years ago. A year ago, his adult daughter decided she would have all her internet purchases sent to his home. Abby, these packages arrive every day, all week long. I'm tired of it. I think she's a spend-aholic.

I told him at the beginning of our relationship that I would never come between him and his daughter. But it has become a bit much. She calls him for every little thing. Now she has started asking him to help with his granddaughter's homework. I have two adult children of my own and grandchildren. Am I overreacting? I'm ready to move out and on. -- OVER IT AND OUT

DEAR OVER IT: Before moving out and on, discuss this with your boyfriend of six years. His daughter seems to be unusually dependent for an adult. Is there a reason why she's doing these things? Could she be fearful that the packages she's ordering could be stolen from her porch? Does her daughter need more help academically than she is able to provide? The answers to those questions could be enlightening. After you get those answers, there will be time to make a rational (rather than emotional) decision about the status of the relationship you have with her father.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 52-year-old single, straight male. For some reason, only men seem to be attracted to me. If I sit at a table in a restaurant or bar, a man will come over and sit next to me. If I go to the park, a man will sit next to me on the bench. Walking down the street, random men approach me. It's terrible. I'm straight! Please help! -- UNIQUE PROBLEM IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR UNIQUE PROBLEM: Because you're not meeting women, try to put yourself in situations where you will meet them. Because you are consistently approached by men and you're not interested, consider asking them if they have a female relative who's single. And when you encounter a woman you think you can click with, speak up and introduce yourself.

DEAR ABBY: I have been dating this guy seriously for a year. We have talked about marriage and we were even looking at rings. Due to certain recent events, I have come to realize that my hope for his Christianity to grow stronger is probably never going to happen. I love this man with all my heart, but I also need a husband who will pray with me, have a heart for God, who will want to go to church and make decisions by praying and leaning on God.

We have talked about this and what my needs are, but he's not sure if he will get there. Do I hold on and hope through my actions and life, he will learn how to walk with God fully, or should I let him go and try to find someone else? -- BROKENHEARTED BELIEVER

DEAR BELIEVER: If you can't accept this man just the way he is, let him go. You shouldn't marry anyone hoping to change him because it wouldn't be fair to either of you. If faith is your No. 1 priority, it would be better for both of you if you look further for a life partner.

DEAR ABBY: My friend "Gina" and I have known each other for many years. The other day she got into a heated discussion on Facebook with several other people we've known for years. It was about politics. When I read her post, I was shocked. She belittled and bullied those who didn't share her opinion. I have since deleted my FB account because I don't want to see such hatred. What do I tell her when she asks why I'm no longer on social media? -- SOCIAL MEDIA DISTANCED

DEAR SOCIAL: Tell Gina the truth. Say you deleted your account because you were shocked when you saw people with differing political opinions being bullied and demeaned, which you found shocking and offensive. If she's foolish enough to push you for more detail, tell her how her post affected you. It's shameful that adults in this day and age cannot calmly discuss their differences without resorting to those tactics.

DEAR ABBY: I am torn between two guys. I have known the first guy for a year, and we had some ups and downs. Six months ago he had a heart attack, but he pulled through, thank God. But since then, things have been very hard. Our relationship went sour and we broke up.

I met the second guy online a month ago. He seems very sweet and down to earth and treats me like a princess. The first guy and I ended up talking again, and the problem is, I'm still in love with him. I think both of them are wonderful and I don't know what decision to make. Please help me. -- CHOICES, CHOICES IN DELAWARE

DEAR CHOICES: Before making any decision, it's important you fully understand why your relationship with Guy No. 1 went sour after his heart attack. Could it be related to his near-death experience? You need to have all the facts before jumping back into a romance with him.

You haven't known Guy No. 2 long enough to really know who he is yet. Do not pull the plug on this one until you have more answers than you were able to put in your letter to me.