DEAR ABBY: I have been dating a great guy for two years. We each have two kids from a previous marriage. I am still legally married (separated almost three years) and am in the process of divorcing. My ex is stubborn and vindictive. He's dragging this whole thing out for no good reason other than to spite me.

I brought up the issue of moving in together with my boyfriend, but he told me he isn't ready. Clearly, since my divorce isn't final, we aren't getting engaged or married anytime soon, but I think it would be the next logical step in moving forward in our relationship.

We see each other every weekend, our kids get along great, and I yearn to blend this already blended family under one roof. I love him, and he says he loves me. He says the fact that I'm still legally married doesn't bother him.

I'm wondering, because after two years he still isn't ready, if he'll ever be ready. What if my divorce isn't final for years? Must I wait until then to be living together?

Honestly, I just want to go to bed with him and wake up with him every morning. Should I set myself a time limit for him to move forward, or should I quit now? We get along in every way, and this is the one worry in the back of my mind. -- WAITING IN NEW YORK

DEAR WAITING: You and your boyfriend need to have an honest conversation. It's possible he may want to avoid the present drama in your divorce. It's equally possible that he doesn't want to move in together because he likes your relationship just the way it is -- living independently from Monday to Friday while enjoying the pleasure of each other's company on weekends.

If this is the case, you need to know that things may not change if and when your husband decides to finalize the divorce. This is something you may also want to discuss with your divorce lawyer. There may be a way to sever the tie that binds. You should not be held captive for years because your spiteful almost-ex is dragging things out.

DEAR ABBY: One of my close friends' 37-year-old daughter was recently married. One hundred and fifty people were invited to her wedding, and I was not one of them. I sent a gift to the bride and groom before the wedding. We have been neighbors and close friends of her parents for 25 years. Needless to say, I am hurt.

My friend keeps sharing all the particulars and photos with me, which I gush over, but she doesn't realize my heart is broken. I thought we were the best of friends. She has other close friends, and I know them too. They were all at the wedding. I am sad and clueless about why I was snubbed, and I can't get over it. Help! -- HURTING INSIDE

DEAR HURTING: It was not your friend's wedding you were eliminated from but her daughter's. If there were 150 guests, half may have come from the groom's side -- friends, relatives, etc. Also, the happy couple may have wanted to include their own contemporaries. Level with your neighbor about how you feel and ask why you were left off the guest list. You may not have been snubbed at all.

DEAR ABBY: My companion of many years and I are retired and live a few hours away from some of his family. When one of them plans a visit, she always insists on taking us out for a meal. She doesn't ask if we would like to eat out but rather "commands" it. Then she insists on paying for the meal.

I enjoy cooking and visiting with family during and after meals. I know what our dietary restrictions are, and most restaurant meals do not meet those requirements, which include low sodium, fat and sugar and no gluten. According to my companion, I'm a good cook, and he enjoys everything I make.

I know I should say something, but what? I need a suggestion on how to deal with the situation without hurting anyone's feelings. -- THANKS, BUT NO THANKS

DEAR T.B.N.T.: This relative may not mean to seem overbearing and may only be trying to be nice. Thank her warmly for wanting to take you to dinner, but tell her no. Explain that because of medical reasons, both of you must strictly limit the sodium, fat, sugar and gluten in your diet, which is why the two of you have decided it is "safer" to eat at home, where you can control what goes into your food. Then invite her to join you because you would love to see her and spend time with her while she's in town.

DEAR ABBY: I am in a difficult situation. My dear friends and bosses, "Rebecca" and "Caesar," are selling their home. They had offered to sell it to me and, at the time, I was interested in buying it. Then I did the one thing I never thought I would do. I found love. Because it's no longer just me, their house won't work for us. I was honest with my friends. They have been giving me the silent treatment ever since, and it's causing problems at work. What is a girl to do? -- IN LOVE IN THE MIDWEST

DEAR IN LOVE: Recognize that Rebecca and Caesar are understandably upset that what they thought would be a quick and easy sale has now become more complicated. Explain to them again that you didn't mean to cause them a problem, but your circumstances changed. And if they continue to take out their disappointment by punishing you at work, look for another job.

DEAR ABBY: I agreed to pay for a cellphone for a friend's daughter while she went to school in the U.S. She was supposed to be here for three years. WELL, it is now year four, and she's planning to stay here after graduation. How do I tell her that I am not willing to continue paying for her phone after graduation? -- TRIED TO HELP IN TEXAS

DEAR TRIED TO HELP: You have several choices. You can tell her parents, write to her or call her on the cellphone you have so generously underwritten. And after you deliver the message, you should be thanked for your generosity not only by her but also her parents.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year. He's amazing, and I can see myself marrying him and having a family one day. There is only one problem. We are healthy in our arguments EXCEPT when his job is brought up. He's applying to go into the police academy.

I have always told people I would never be with a cop because of my own anxiety. We fight about this all the time, and while I don't ask him to find something else to do, it's kind of implied. I don't mean to be like that (or do I?) because I want him to be happy and do what he wants, but I also am terrified his job won't end well.

He asks why I am even dating him, and the honest truth is because he is an amazing man who truly does right by people. I love him. But do you think he is right? Is this something that can be overcome? -- JUST ONE THING IN MASSACHUSETTS

DEAR JUST ONE THING: It takes a particular kind of person -- a very strong one -- to marry a partner who is in the military or in law enforcement. The physical danger can create additional stress in relationships.

You cannot and should not dictate what your boyfriend's job should be. If he thinks he can find emotional satisfaction in police work -- provided he completes his training -- he should give it a try. If you don't think you can handle the stress of kissing him goodbye and being unsure that he will come home from work, then you are not the woman for him.

DEAR ABBY: My friend of 30 years had knee replacement surgery 15 years ago. She is fully recovered, goes to the gym three days each week and walks three miles on the treadmill. She still has (and gets renewed each doctor visit) her handicap parking card. Whenever we go anywhere and park, she always whips out her card and uses the handicap parking spots, even when there are multiple other spots available.

She's extremely religious, and I cannot understand how she doesn't realize this is morally wrong. I have spoken to her about it, but she still does it. I am not a perfect person either, but this really bothers me. What do you think? -- STYMIED IN THE SOUTH

DEAR STYMIED: I think your friend should be ashamed of herself for abusing the privilege. And I also think the doctor who is aiding and abetting her in this fraud is equally at fault.

DEAR ABBY: I have been married for 22 years. My husband is 60 and retired from the military. Ever since I have known him, he has always needed recognition and pats on the back, which I have tried to supply. However, over the past three years, it has become hard to put up with. He wants lots of applause for any accomplishments and posts daily announcements on Facebook, which have become an embarrassment. It's childish! I suspect his Facebook friends feel obligated to affirm how good their friend is. Should I mention that he needs to go lighter on his praise-fishing expeditions or remain quiet? -- EMBARRASSED IN OKLAHOMA

DEAR EMBARRASSED: For the time being, remain quiet. If your husband starts to notice that he's beginning to lose Facebook friends, suggest it to him then -- gently. And encourage him to diversify his activities so he spends less time on Facebook.