DEAR ABBY: A close friend and I usually take a girls' trip once a year -- a long weekend at the same place. We drive there because it's close to where we live. She has asked me again this year about going.

I don't feel like doing it for many reasons. She spends a lot of time on her phone, texting or playing on apps, when we should be socializing. I like to relax and have a couple of drinks when I'm on vacation; she doesn't drink. Our taste in restaurants and food is completely different, plus she's on a tight budget and can't afford to spend like I can. (I usually cover the cost of our stay in a condo.) She's also negative and enjoys feeling sorry for herself, while I prefer looking on the bright side of things.

I don't mind spending an evening with her, but that's it. She hates her job, complains about financial problems and taking care of her parents, and her marriage isn't the best -- but she does have a big heart. I would rather save my vacation days from work and stay home with my husband and animals.

I take multiple vacations year round; she does not. I almost feel obligated to go. I'm afraid I'll hurt her feelings if I tell her I don't want to do it anymore. I can't use work, money or the place being occupied as an excuse. What should I do? -- STAYCATION INSTEAD

DEAR STAYCATION: Frankly, if you can tolerate this woman's company for one evening only, your friendship may have gone from hot to temperate. Traditions don't necessarily last forever, and it may be time to make a change.

Tell her that this year you would love to spend an evening with her, but you prefer to stay quietly at home with your husband rather than take the long weekend trip. Be as diplomatic as possible and tell her you know she's carrying a lot on her shoulders, but the only person who can "fix" the things that stress her out or make her unhappy is her -- by talking with someone who is better qualified than you are to listen and advise her.

DEAR ABBY: This is hard to write. My mother-in-law constantly asks me how much I weigh, expecting me to give her an honest answer. I have been saying that my medical information is private, but she continues to ask, even going so far as to ask other people if they know my weight. She wheedles me for confidential health data every single time I see her.

Is she trying to steal my medical ID? Telling her it's private won't keep her from asking again. It really makes me not want to visit her anymore. Any ideas? -- PRIVATE INFO IN THE SOUTH

DEAR PRIVATE: Neither of us knows the intent behind your mother-in-law's persistence. She may think you are too thin or overweight and be trying to open an unwelcome conversation on the subject.

You asked me for ideas, and I do have several:

1. Turn the tables and ask HER, "Why do you keep asking me that? It's making me uncomfortable."

2. Say, "My weight is my business, not yours."

3. Tell her the next time she mentions your weight will be the last time she sees you.

DEAR ABBY: My husband loves to dance, and so do I. In fact, we met dancing many years ago. He takes Zumba classes despite his knee problems. I loved Zumba but stopped because it hurt my knees.

Many times women have come up to him -- oblivious of my presence -- to tell him how good he is. This has happened on cruises and just now in a restaurant. I love that he's a good dancer. But I don't like random women telling him so. It feels like they are flirting. Yes, I am jealous because he is my husband. Are my feelings normal? -- JEALOUS IN THE EAST

DEAR JEALOUS: As long as your husband acts appropriately in accepting the compliments, you may be overreacting. Instead of feeling jealousy, why are you not feeling a twinge of pride in his accomplishment?

Your feelings are normal -- for someone who is insecure. If you accept that you can't stop people from complimenting your husband, and that giving him a verbal gold star isn't necessarily flirting, you will both be better off.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are in our late 40s and raised three very successful sons. We had always wanted to adopt but were not able to until our boys were grown. Everyone has been supportive except my husband's parents.

Our daughter, whom we brought home 3 1/2 years ago, is now 7. Anyone who knows her adores her. She embraces family and has a beautiful relationship with her big brothers and their families.

My in-laws have other grandchildren whom they shower with affection. Our daughter, not so much. She doesn't seem to mind, so I know I shouldn't let it bother me. However, I want our in-laws to be fair with her. I know I can't make it so outside our immediate family circle. Am I being unrealistic? -- PERPLEXED IN THE MIDWEST

DEAR PERPLEXED: I think so. While you can't change your in-laws' behavior, you can make sure your daughter knows she is much loved by her parents, uncles, aunts and cousins.

DEAR ABBY: My fiance and I are being married next month in a private ceremony. We're having a small family/closest friends barbecue reception the following weekend. We do not want any uninvited guests, but we also don't want to come across as rude. What's your suggestion for polite wording on invitations asking that there be no "extra" guests brought to our reception? Our budget is very tight. -- NOT A BRIDEZILLA

DEAR NOT A BRIDEZILLA: Put nothing like that in writing. There is a rule of etiquette that only guests whose names are on the invitations should attend the event. If you feel your prospective guests are ignorant of the social graces, call them and explain: "We would love you to celebrate with us, but because our budget is limited, we are unable to entertain uninvited guests. We hope you understand."

TO MY READERS: I wish you all a very Happy Easter. -- LOVE, ABBY

DEAR ABBY: I am 28 and recently found my biological father through Facebook after more than 20 years of not knowing if he was still alive. Although I am happy that I found him, I'm scared to let my family -- my mom, my stepdad and my sisters -- know I have reconnected with him.

When I asked about my dad years ago (I even had a pic of him), my stepdad felt betrayed and upset that I was even curious. I had to rip up the picture because I felt so guilty that my stepdad was hurt.

I know my stepdad will manipulate the situation (that's just how he is) and con my sisters and my mom into not speaking to me again. On the other hand, I want to create a relationship with my father and start where we left off. I have two beautiful daughters I know he will love to meet, but I am scared because I know this will divide my family. What should I do? -- ANONYMOUS IN THE WEST

DEAR ANONYMOUS: I wish you had disclosed why, for more than 20 years, your birth father had no visitation with you. Whose decision was it -- his? Your mother's? If it was your birth father's, I would question his character.

That said, at the ripe old age of 28, you are an adult and should have the right to decide -- without coercion -- whom you wish to associate with. You shouldn't feel guilty for wanting to get to know your birth father. Those feelings are normal. It won't divide your family if you keep your mouth shut and your private life separate.

DEAR ABBY: My girlfriend, "Crystal," recently dumped me. We were madly in love, and she would constantly message me and tell me how I was perfect, she didn't deserve someone as amazing as me and how I'm the only one she wants in her life. We were talking about moving in together, marriage and our future.

Then all of a sudden a well-known creep with a shady past offered her a job in another state. Crystal's family, friends and I all told her not to take the job or talk to that guy because he's bad news. She took the job, moved across the country and left us all behind.

She has now cut me out of her life. I haven't heard from her, and her mom told me she checks in with her family only occasionally. My question is what did I miss? I know Crystal was always hard on herself and thought she wasn't doing enough with her life, but I was constantly reassuring and encouraging her.

I believe this guy manipulated her and made her think this was her last chance at the career she was seeking. I am afraid she's going to learn a hard lesson and get let down drastically. Is there anything we can do to help her see this? -- BAFFLED AND DEVASTATED

DEAR BAFFLED: No, I am sorry to say there isn't. You didn't miss anything; you were misled. Crystal told you she wanted a future with you when the truth was what she really wanted was a career, and you were Plan B. There's an old saying, "Bad pennies always turn up." If the man who hired her is as shady as you say he is, she'll be back. And I hope you will have moved on long before then.