DEAR ABBY: I've only had one boyfriend. For most of my childhood, he was my best friend. When we were 14, I got scared we might fight, break up and never forgive each other, so I told him I wanted to go back to being just friends without explaining why. In retrospect, I know how stupid it was, but when I was 14 it made perfect sense. When I said it, he got angry, but more than angry he was very hurt. I never saw him again.
My problem is, I haven't been able to put myself in a relationship since. Sometimes he resurfaces in my dreams. When it happens I always feel happy "seeing" him again. I don't know what to do about this nagging feeling and how I put off a love life because of it.
It's more than a decade later. He has probably changed so much and would want nothing to do with me, so I think it's better to leave him be. But I'd like to talk to the person he is now, whoever that is. Is there a way I can solve this? -- NERVOUS ROMANTIC
DEAR NERVOUS ROMANTIC: Yes. If you know where he is, contact him and tell him you would like to talk privately with him. Explain what happened so many years ago and see if he is willing to hear you out. And please stop beating yourself up over what happened when you were 14, because it was normal teenage behavior.