DEAR ABBY: My daughter has two boys who treat her like crap. They swear, call her a b----, whore, liar and the f-word. They break things in her house and have no respect for anyone.

The problem started after she broke up with their biological father and married her new boyfriend. The father brainwashes the boys to do these things to make life a living hell with her new husband.

What I cannot understand is why my daughter goes out of her way to please these two ungrateful kids and still cannot see how they are destroying her present household. This is killing me. What can she do to solve the problem? -- ANGRY IN THE WEST

DEAR ANGRY: The first thing your daughter will have to do to solve her problem is acknowledge that there is one, and she may be part of it. Then, she will have to quit trying to ingratiate herself with the boys and act more like a parent than a doormat, which means she will have to institute consequences when her sons misbehave and treat her disrespectfully. Unless she is prepared to do that, nothing will change.

DEAR ABBY: My husband is a physician with a heavy call schedule. For years I have struggled with how to RSVP to invitations to cocktail parties and/or dinner. Many times I can go and would like to attend, but I can't be sure my husband will be able to be there. Many times I decline for us both because I worry that it might be awkward for the host/hostess if I accept for myself, but say I'm "not sure" for my husband. How would you handle this? -- REALLY WANTS TO GO IN KANSAS

DEAR REALLY: If I wanted to attend the gathering, I would call my hosts and explain that I would love to come but couldn't guarantee my husband would be able to because of his practice. Then I would add that he might drop by later (if that's feasible). Gracious hosts will welcome you.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a longtime reader and I'm curious. Do you ever receive letters from "the other party"? Has anyone ever read your column, realized the letter is about them and written to tell you their side? Would you ever print it if they did? There are always two sides to every story. -- WONDERING IN HOUSTON

DEAR WONDERING: The answer is yes. It happens rarely, but it does happen. Last year I published a letter from a woman who was upset because her ex-husband had promised their daughter a large sum of money for the daughter's wedding. He had told the daughter her mother would pay half the amount. She felt she should have been consulted first. (I agreed.)

I then heard from the ex-husband, who wanted me to know he had "apologized to her profusely" for not discussing the wedding budget beforehand and that he had offered to lower the budget, but the mother "only wanted to be responsible for paying for the bridal gown." He closed by saying, "I'm not looking to get this published, just thought you'd like to know the other side of the story and allow myself to blow off a little steam." I hope this satisfies your curiosity.

DEAR ABBY: I just found out that my husband of 37 years is having an affair. I have supported him in every way I could -- raising our daughters, taking care of the household and holding a full-time job while he traveled for business and his many hobbies.

We both work hard and have developed a good life. We have been discussing retirement and maybe a move to another area. In recent years he has become evasive and has improved his appearance noticeably.

While it's true that I fell out of love with him several years ago because of his selfishness and lack of respect for me, we have still been good partners and parents and enjoyed doing things together. I do not like him spending our money on another woman and don't want this to get back to the children as it will really, really hurt them.

Should I continue to pretend I don't know, or do I confront him? I doubt he would end the affair completely even if he knows it has been found out. And yes, there are a lot of assets involved if this comes to divorce. -- KNOWS THE SECRET

DEAR KNOWS: What a sad story. You say you fell out of love with your husband several years ago. Is it possible that he sensed it?

Because there are "a lot of assets" involved, consult an attorney about what your spousal rights are in the event that a continued partnership is not what your husband wants for the rest of his life. Then tell him you know what has been going on and offer him the option of marriage counseling so the two of you can repair your marriage. His reaction will tell you what you need to do next.

DEAR ABBY: My mom and I had a very close relationship until two years ago when I found out she was hanging out with my ex-husband. This man ruined me financially with his gambling habit, and Mom was first in line telling me to divorce him. From day one she never liked him. My ex went on to make my life a living hell for many years by not paying child support or spending time with our three kids.

All these years later, they now go to the casino together, and she's got him going to her church. I feel hurt and angry. She sings his praises -- "he's a changed man!" I had to finally stop my daily calls and the many texts we shared all day long because, even after I told her how much this behavior hurt me, she told me she was sorry I felt that way. She claims there is nothing to their relationship except friendship. How do I get past feeling replaced and disrespected? -- MISERABLE IN MINNESOTA

DEAR MISERABLE: Your mother may consider your ex to be "changed," but I have to question how much someone with a gambling problem has changed if he is accompanying her to a casino. She must be desperate for company to befriend someone who treated her daughter -- and grandchildren -- so badly.

The way to get past feeling replaced and disrespected is to get on with your own life and spend as little time as possible looking back. Your mother has made her choice, and she isn't going to change. Now it's up to you to find things to fill the void she left.

DEAR ABBY: I am a working stay-at-home mom with a successful career. I am also the primary breadwinner. My husband doesn't work so he can take care of our baby girl full time.

To give me quiet time, my husband often takes her to the mall or someplace fun so I can concentrate. A problem has arisen, though. Since he's alone with our daughter, he's run into problems with security guards who think he's kidnapping her or doing something suspicious. We're not sure what to do about this.

I obviously don't want there to be problems for him, especially since I am not physically able to drive and come to meet him if there's a misunderstanding. Can you tell me the most reliable way to prove that he's our daughter's father and holds no nefarious intent? -- CONCERNED WIFE AND MAMA

DEAR CONCERNED W&M: While this scenario seems incredible to me, if he isn't already doing so, your husband should start carrying family pictures of the two of you and your daughter when he takes her out. That way, if there is any question that your husband is her father, it can be quickly resolved.

DEAR ABBY: My sister invited our mother, who is in her 70s, to my wedding dress fittings. I did not invite her.

I have forgiven my mother for the crappy environment she created for us while I was growing up. I always invite her to family gatherings although she remains demeaning, demoralizing and bitter. My mother can last about an hour in my company without saying something negative and snarky, and I don't want her to ruin this fun occasion.

She knows how I feel about her attitude around me. I don't call or talk to her unless there is a family emergency. I normally grin and bear it on holidays for my sister's sake. My sister has a mental illness, and our mom is an almost daily presence in her life, which I appreciate, as I live in another state. Must I suck it up again for my sister's sake? -- GETTING MARRIED IN MINNESOTA

DEAR GETTING MARRIED: Permit your mother to be present for the first fitting. If, as you predict, she becomes negative and snarky, concentrate on the fitting, then inform her -- and your sister afterward -- that she will not be welcome to join you for another one.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a 23-year-old senior in college. I came out as gay at 21, but still haven't found a boyfriend. I had a crush on one guy and thought he liked me back, but a few weeks ago he told me he has a boyfriend. I was heartbroken.

People have always told me it's great to be single, but the truth is I'm just not happy. I'm lonely and I want a boyfriend. I'm having no luck, and I don't know what to do. Help, please. -- SO READY IN TEXAS

DEAR SO READY: Look around and scope out what opportunities there are for an LGBTQ person in your college town. Get out and be sociable. Join an activity group if you have the time. If nothing suits you, go online and research dating sites and apps. However, if you don't find someone there, you may have to be patient for another year until you can move to a community that offers greater options.