DEAR ABBY: My best friend and I are middle-aged women. Throughout our long friendship, I have been one of the few people in her life who was there for her as she dealt with boyfriend problems, elderly parents, serious illnesses, deaths, etc.

She became engaged for the first time recently, and asked me to go out of town with her to check out a potential wedding venue. While we were there, she looked away (wouldn't even look me in the eye) and announced that only her sister (with whom she doesn't get along) would be in her wedding party.

Although I was deeply disappointed, I said nothing. I was more disappointed about the way she made the announcement.

Since then, she has asked for my advice on everything from invitations to wedding etiquette, etc., instead of asking her sister, who lives out of state. At this point, I just want to be a guest at the wedding and enjoy seeing her get married. How do I bow out of this untitled role she has given me? -- BOWING OUT IN THE WEST

DEAR BOWING OUT: If your friend had felt good about making the announcement, she wouldn't have hesitated to look you in the eye. I suspect that she included her sister -- who she doesn't get along with -- in her wedding party because of pressure from relatives.

Because you feel her questions should more appropriately be answered by the sister, tell your friend -- as kindly as possible -- she should be asking her maid of honor, who is "only a phone call away."

DEAR ABBY: I fell in love with my first crush 30 years ago. We both felt the same way, but because I was six years younger than him, my parents didn't approve. We lost contact, and over the years, I would sometimes wonder what had happened to him. Last week his cousin found me on Facebook, and I was able to video call him. We were filled with emotion and realized our feelings haven't changed.

We both have families. I'm divorced with two young adults. He's married with three young adults. I don't want to cause him any problems, and yet, I'm willing to let it play out and see what happens. All I want is just to see him again, but I'm afraid of what will happen. Please tell me what to do! -- FULL OF EMOTIONS

DEAR FULL OF EMOTIONS: The problem with making important decisions when we are "full of emotions" is they're usually impulsive and the wrong choice. Consider this: You and this man are adults with responsibilities to others. If you see him and he still feels the same as you stated, it may be the start of an affair and the end of his marriage.

If it's an affair, you will be his side dish and unable to form a meaningful relationship with anyone else for years. If divorce is involved, his wife and children will be collateral damage. Because I'm not sure you have the strength to keep your distance if you meet him, ask him to include his wife and family when you do, and bring along your children.

DEAR ABBY: My son has taken it upon himself to get romantically involved with two different married women. He's newly divorced after a long marriage and hates the idea of being alone. He says he loves them both, but realizes there's no future with either one, so he's trying to extricate himself from the jam he's gotten into. The problem is, the women refuse to let go, and it's causing all sorts of problems. Any ideas? -- DAD IN THE MIDDLE IN NEW YORK

DEAR DAD: If you are smart, you'll stay out of this mess. Hasn't it occurred to you that if your son was truly unhappy with the situation, he -- not you -- would have sought help for his problem?

He doesn't love either of those women; he loves what he's getting from them -- attention, companionship, sex. Because they are married, he doesn't have to worry about them wanting a commitment from him as a single woman might. If he really wanted to stop these dolls from "stalking" him, he would threaten to make their husbands aware of what's been going on, and that would be the end of it.

DEAR ABBY: I am 15 and my mom was recently diagnosed with cancer. My two older sisters are away in college, and my dad works all the time. How should I balance taking care of Mom, doing schoolwork and playing field hockey? I wish I could give each task my full attention, but I'm not going to be home much because of school. -- JUGGLING IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR JUGGLING: I am sure your mother's diagnosis has caused stress for every member of your family, including those who are away, and for that I am sorry. You are so young, and I can only imagine the stress you are feeling.

If you were discussing this with your mother, I am sure she would tell you -- as I am -- how important it is that you keep up with your schoolwork and activities. You cannot assume the entire responsibility for her care by yourself. Who will help her during her treatments, and how much time you should realistically devote, is something both your parents should help you to determine. None of you will really know how much assistance she'll require until the process is started, so be flexible and take things a step at a time.

DEAR ABBY: My mom owns two successful women's clothing stores near my hometown that she's had for more than 10 years. The problem is, she named them after me, and I hate it!

I've tried talking to her about it many times, but every time I bring it up she gets sarcastic, says things like, "This is a fun conversation," and doesn't let me get a word out. I have tried talking to the rest of my family about it, but they don't consider it a big deal and tell me I'm being ridiculous. I have run out of ideas about what to do, so if you could give me some advice, it would really help. -- ANGRY DAUGHTER

DEAR ANGRY DAUGHTER: Many daughters would consider what your mother did to be a compliment. However, because it bothers you so much, consider going by your middle name. And, if that doesn't satisfy you, and you feel strongly enough about this, go to court and legally change your name to another one you like when you reach adulthood.

DEAR ABBY: I have been in a relationship with "Mason" for almost two years. I moved in with him a few months back, and things have been very good between us. I know he's The One, and I'd marry him right now if he'd ask.

My problem is his roommate, "Ryan." Mason has hinted about a proposal in the near future, which is something I used to want until recently, when I brought up a concern of mine about his roommate.

Ryan has lived with Mason for more than 10 years. Ryan is a grown, healthy man who hasn't had a regular job during the entire 10 years he's lived with my boyfriend. Mason says he depends on Ryan's $500 monthly rent payment to keep up with the lifestyle he's used to having. I want to go further in our relationship without a third person, but when I brought it up, I was made out to be the bad guy and accused of not liking Ryan -- which I consider a red flag.

Would it be unfair to break up with Mason because he's so fond of -- and dependent upon -- his longtime friend/roommate and the $500 rent? I don't want to give him an ultimatum. I adore him and wish he was as fond of me as he is his roommate. I want us to depend on each other and experience life like a normal couple without a third party. We both work, and I'm starting to resent Ryan, who I feel has no intention of moving on. Should I move out and walk away because I find it weird? -- "BAD GUY" GIRLFRIEND

DEAR B.G.G.: Before moving out and walking away, have another discussion with Mason. Ask him if he envisions a future with all three of you in it, and what that means. And while you're at it, ask him why he feels he needs Ryan's $500 since both of you are working and there should be no reduction in his lifestyle if Ryan moves out. In fact, there should be an improvement if you split all the bills. If Mason still can't agree to part with Ryan, then move out and walk away because he's already taken.

DEAR ABBY: My mother has dementia. My sister came to visit. The day after she left to return to Georgia, I noticed a picture was missing from the wall. When I called and asked her about it, she said it was "her inheritance" and Mom had given it to her "a long time ago." I think it was stealing. Mom has no idea it's gone. What do you think? -- THROWN IN MICHIGAN

DEAR THROWN: If it wasn't theft, your sister would have discussed it with you before she took the picture rather than "disappear" the item. However, in the interest of family harmony, it's important to carefully pick your battles.

I wish you had mentioned who will be in charge of your mother's estate after her death. Because you live closer to her, I assume it will be you. If it's a family lawyer, in the interest of a fair division of the assets, that person should be notified so the picture can be properly appraised.