DEAR ABBY: I have hearing loss. My insurance isn't very good, and the monthly payments for hearing aids are the equivalent of a car payment, so I try my best and do without. People who know about my hearing loss will talk louder for me or let me know when they need my attention. Even strangers will repeat themselves or talk louder if I say I'm hard of hearing.

The problem is that my husband refuses to talk louder for me or make any attempt to improve our communication. He has gone as far as to threaten that he just won't talk to me anymore because he's sick of repeating himself. No matter how many times I say I can't hear, he practically whispers or will scream at the top of his lungs at me to make a point. It's like he's taking my hearing loss personally, as though somehow my hearing loss is my fault. I also feel he may have an ulterior motive for talking softer.

I feel depressed and isolated, and I'm not sure what to do. My marriage is falling apart. Any advice is appreciated. -- I CAN'T HEAR YOU IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR CAN'T HEAR: Of course you feel depressed and isolated! Your husband either doesn't like or hasn't accepted the fact that you have a hearing disability, so he's punishing you for it. What he's doing is emotionally abusive.

Please have your hearing checked by an audiologist to determine how much of your hearing you have lost. Take your husband along so a professional can explain it to him. And be sure to ask if there may be lower-cost options for an assistive device that won't bust your budget.

DEAR ABBY: When I was 17, I was engaged to a serviceman. I broke the engagement because my mother disapproved. I was young, naive, had no job or money, and I had never disobeyed my mom.

Big mistake! I have paid for it for more than 50 years. I have raised a family, but my heart is still with my young military man. I wake up in the middle of the night thinking of him. I've dreamt about him all these years. I still cry and feel I can hardly breathe sometimes. I still love him. Thoughts of him are consuming my life. I wonder if anyone else has had these feelings this long.

I don't want to risk disturbing two families by contacting him in another state to apologize. Please advise me about what to do. -- SEEKING CLOSURE IN THE SOUTH

DEAR SEEKING CLOSURE: There is no magic wand I can wave to make those feelings go away. I can, however, point out that your memories of that young man are from the perspective of a 17-year-old girl with little life experience. Viewed from that perspective, the life (and person) you have idealized may be far from reality.

Because these thoughts have become obsessive, it would benefit you to talk them through with a licensed mental health professional. Please don't put it off any longer, because it's clear from what you have written that you are hurting and need professional help.

DEAR ABBY: My husband's sister "Cassie" and I got along well until we had kids. Our children are months apart in age, and parenting has brought out the differences in our beliefs in a way that has made it hard for us to get along.

I'm a proponent of Western medicine. My kids are vaccinated. We take them to the doctor, give them antibiotics when their doctor prescribes them and emphasize a balanced diet.

Cassie is a proponent of alternative medicine. She doesn't vaccinate her kids, keeps a vegan house and uses homeopathic remedies and meditation to combat illness. This difference has resulted in heated arguments about what's best for kids, and we have not been able to "agree to disagree."

Recently she sent me a large, and probably expensive, set of herbal remedies as a "gift." If it were from someone else, I'd thank her and give the set to someone who would use it. But in light of our ongoing "debates," this feels like a passive-aggressive dig at my values. It would be like me sending her a grass-fed steak and a wheel of Brie. How should I respond? -- DIFFERENT MEDICAL BELIEFS

DEAR D.M.B.: Don't overreact. Write Cassie a sweet note thanking her for her "thoughtfulness" and give the unwanted gift to someone who might use it or toss it. Do not let this degenerate into another argument. And let's hope that her children continue to enjoy good health.

DEAR ABBY: I am mature for being 16. However, I have a few quirks that I prefer not to tell anyone about because when I do, most of the feedback I get is negative.

First, I don't like watching PG-13 movies, so my favorite TV shows and movies are for kids. My mom and sister keep telling me how dumb and stupid it is and that they're surprised I don't watch things "more my age." I don't call their shows stupid. I hate telling people my favorite TV shows because of the kind of reaction I get from the people close to me.

Second, I love stuffed animals. Last time I counted, I had around 60. All of them have value to me and make me happy. Is there something wrong with having that many? One of my sister's famous quotes is, "How come you have them if you don't use them?" Occasionally she has tried to take stuff from me because of her "philosophy."

Is there something wrong with me? Or should I ignore the nasty comments? -- KID AT HEART IN THE MIDWEST

DEAR KID AT HEART: There is no accounting for taste. Many adults still read the funnies. I know this for certain because I am one of them.

We all have our quirks, and that includes your mother and your sister. Yours harm no one, and if they bring you pleasure, I see no reason not to indulge yourself. Your mom and sister may be teasing you, so stop rising to the bait.

P.S. Your sister may think your stuffed animal collection is juvenile, but she shouldn't be taking them without your permission because that's stealing, and stealing is a serious problem.

DEAR ABBY: I am a man who owns a large four-bedroom home, and I have two tenants. One pays the rent on time, helps with cleaning and yard work, and is an all-around great roommate. The other has been here for four months, has never paid his rent on time and always disappears when we must clear off the driveway or do yard work.

The major problem I have with this guy is he sleepwalks -- at least he claims he does. He opens doors at night. Some mornings I have found the front door or garage door wide open.

Additionally, he raids the refrigerator late at night. He claims he doesn't realize he's doing it. It's really annoying to find food I prepared the night before to take to work has been eaten.

I have spoken to him about it on numerous occasions, and he claims that he can't control his sleepwalking. I feel he should have told me about his issues prior to signing the lease. None of the references he gave mentioned his sleepwalking.

Is it considered a disability? Would I be discriminating against a disability if I chose to not renew his lease because of his sleepwalking? -- LANDLORD IN WISCONSIN

DEAR LANDLORD: Because doors are being left open, it might be in your interest to install inexpensive security cameras. Sleepwalking (and sleep eating) can be symptoms of a sleep disorder, or possibly be caused by certain sleep medications. If your tenant is unaware of this, he should be informed and advised to be evaluated at a sleep disorder clinic.

Because he doesn't pay rent on time or do other things expected of him, you may not be obligated to renew his lease. My advice is to talk to a lawyer about how -- and whether -- you can get rid of this tenant.

DEAR ABBY: My ex-mother-in-law, "Blanche," takes my 14-year-old daughter, "Grace," shopping often. I was grateful at first, but now she buys her anything she wants.

Grace has a high school dance soon, and I was looking forward to shopping with her. But before I could go, Blanche took her and bought her a $299 dress. I wasn't consulted because Grace knew I would've said no. She's a freshman and that's just way too much money to spend.

I asked them to take the dress back, and Blanche said OK. A week later I called her to explain why I said no, but instead of listening, she told me it was her Christmas and birthday present for Grace, and she wasn't taking it back.

My daughter never spends that kind of money. Grace said she was keeping the dress, and I told her she was not wearing it. How do I explain this to my daughter who has become self-entitled because of her grandmother? -- ANYTHING SHE WANTS

DEAR ANYTHING: You have already explained it to your daughter. You told her it was too much money to spend. The problem isn't just Grace, it's also your ex-mother-in-law. You are Grace's mother, and your wishes should have been respected. I don't blame you for being angry.