DEAR ABBY: My husband had a medical event that left him unable to drive. He is very isolated despite my efforts to keep him connected. His children live an hour away, and it's up to me to drive him to them. They rarely call him. He has a stepdaughter who lives only a few miles from us. We reach out to her, but she also doesn't have time for him. It's ironic because she regularly ministers to strangers through her church while her stepfather languishes in loneliness.

How deeply appreciated an offer to take this lonely old gentleman shopping, for a drive, or giving him a visit or a weekly phone call would be. What else can I do about this? -- FRUSTRATED IN FLORIDA

DEAR FRUSTRATED: I am sorry you didn't mention how close your husband was to his children before the medical event. If they were close and have abandoned him, then shame on them.

I see no way for you to force them to make more of an effort to give their father the emotional support he needs. You can, however, depending upon how impaired he is, try to involve him in activities that don't require being driven an hour away. If there's a senior center near you, you might have more luck in keeping him less isolated if you reach out to them.

DEAR ABBY: A group of friends and I go out for dinner. When the check arrives, we all have cash except for one woman who wants to pay her share with a credit card. She claims she "doesn't know how much she owes" and tells the waiter to use her credit card to pay her share. Abby, she then pays only for her food and beverage, no tax and no tip! I have told her in the past to bring cash, but she won't.

I think it is unfair to the waiter to have to figure out how much she owes. When we tried to talk to her about it, she reacted like she was being attacked and went to other friends and got them to agree with "her side." If anyone disagrees with her, she goes on and on until she either loses a friend or the person gives in and tells her she's right. How do we deal with someone like this? Should we just give up on her and end the friendship? -- CHECK, PLEASE

DEAR CHECK, PLEASE: I see no reason to give up on the friendship. Just stop having dinner with her if her behavior bothers you.

DEAR ABBY: I'm 12 and I'm depressed. I have been depressed for a year now. I have not told my mom that I cry in the shower. Please guide me on what to do and help get me out of this dark hole. -- SAD IN SAN DIEGO

DEAR SAD: I'm so glad you wrote. It's very important that you tell your mother or some other trusted adult that you are depressed, and how long this has been going on. You may need counseling or the intervention of some other adult to fix this problem. Please don't wait, and please do write again and let me know how you're doing. I care.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 17-year-old girl and somewhat spoiled. My mother delivers breakfast in bed to me daily. My dad eats a burger for dinner, but Mom cooks a ribeye steak with a loaded baked potato for me.

I don't know how to cook, but Dad says I must cook a complete Thanksgiving dinner with no assistance! My smartphone will help, but do you have any ideas? -- WORRIED ABOUT TURKEYS

DEAR WORRIED: Mastering the basics of cooking is an important skill you will need when you no longer live with your parents. Your father has the right idea, but he's going about it the wrong way. Expecting you to go from not knowing how to boil water to producing an entire Thanksgiving dinner without help is unrealistic, to say the least.

You and your mother should prepare the dinner together, and she should guide you as you prepare one or two of the dishes. This will ensure that there will be a home-cooked feast rather than a disaster after which your family will wind up in a restaurant.

DEAR ABBY: I am an adult student in my late 20s. I had multiple "jobs" and careers before I finally settled on teaching. Until I finish my degree, however, I am working in a customer service job to pay the bills. This, combined with my youthful appearance, has meant I must deal with people who assume I am a teenager and who treat me with disrespect.

My late grandmother always said that polite people should hold their tongues, so can you please inform your readers that because the person tending to their needs may look like "a kid," it's no excuse for saying things like, "I don't want to talk to some kid; where's your supervisor?" By the way, Abby, I am the supervisor. -- OLDER THAN HE LOOKS IN IOWA

DEAR OLDER: I'm pleased to remind them, but an appropriate response to the person demanding to see the supervisor would be, "I am the supervisor. Now, how may I help you?"

DEAR ABBY: Next year my boyfriend and I will have been together for 15 years. We are not married and feel no urge to do so. We plan on spending the rest of our lives together; we just don't plan on a wedding.

My question is, I'd like to have an anniversary party. Is it unheard of for a unmarried couple to have one? We love each other and would like to celebrate our relationship with friends and family. What do you think? And would it be wrong to have a dance to "our song"? Any ideas would be appreciated as well. -- UNMARRIED IN MICHIGAN

DEAR UNMARRIED: Fifteen years together is something to celebrate and there's no reason why you shouldn't. You can do anything you want at the party -- including dance to "your song." An anniversary of the day you became a couple is fine. Advertise it that way and there should be no criticism.

DEAR ABBY: I have been friends with "Martha" for 40 years. We live a few hundred miles apart, so I like to call her and chat. The problem is, her husband always answers the phone, and he likes to give me a hard time.

When I identify myself and ask to speak to Martha, he says he doesn't know anyone by my name, or says there's no Martha living there. Once he told Martha to ask me how my ex-husband was. (I have not seen my ex for 40 years, since our divorce.)

The last time it happened, I told Martha her husband was annoying and that she should call me from now on. She said he was just trying to be funny. I haven't heard from her since, not even a birthday card. Was I wrong to speak up? Should I apologize or just lose this friendship? -- PROBLEM HUSBAND IN FLORIDA

DEAR PROBLEM: Martha's husband doesn't strike me as being particularly witty. After a few repeat performances of his lame material, I can understand how someone would become annoyed. I don't think you owe Martha an apology for being honest about how you felt. Because you left the ball in her court, it's possible that since you did all the work staying in touch, your 40-year friendship was not as close as you assumed or you would have heard from her.

DEAR ABBY: A friend and I belong to a book club and have regularly gone to lunch and a movie afterward. We have occasionally mentioned a movie we liked while chatting prior to the start of the book club meeting. This has prompted other people to invite themselves along or ask if they can go with us.

If we wanted to spend more time with these women, we would have invited them. The two of us feel that this afternoon outing is our time together and we would prefer it being just us. We changed the day, which was a bit inconvenient but preferable to the alternative. How do we handle it when future inquiries come up without hurting feelings or sounding snobbish? -- OUR TIME TOGETHER

DEAR OUR TIME: Your mistake was in talking about your movie dates in front of the other women. In the future, handle it by refraining from doing that, and your problem will go away.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend and I have been together for two years. We are in our 50s and have both been married before. My problem is I don't know how to respond to his friends and family when they talk to me about his first wife. They tell story after story, and it makes me uncomfortable. I feel disrespected but smile politely to not be rude. Any thoughts? -- GIRLFRIEND IN NEW JERSEY

DEAR GIRLFRIEND: I am sure no one does it out of a desire to make you uncomfortable or disrespect you. How you respond would depend upon whether your boyfriend's marriage ended in death or divorce.

If his former wife is deceased, a way to change the subject might be to say, "It sounds like she was a wonderful (mother, daughter, woman)." However, if the marriage ended in divorce, all you need to say is that you'd rather focus on the present than the unhappy past.